Eu recentemente comecei a namorar a mulher mais maravilhosa que já conheci, com quem tenho um relacionamento há anos. Bem, moramos em estados diferentes, então fui visitá-la. Antes disso, fiz um teste como precaução. Bem, tivemos relações sexuais pela primeira vez e eu tive uma queimadura por fricção devido a uma peça de roupa que tentei mover para o lado. Nós dois sabemos a causa da queimadura, pois ambos vimos acontecer e eu senti. Antes disso, nunca tive nenhum sintoma. Quatro dias depois, ela está tendo o que parece ser uma erupção. Eu estou em casa neste momento e descobri que tenho HSV-2. Não fiz nenhum teste antes deste. Bem, agora, por causa da minha queimadura, tenho certeza de que a transmiti. Eu não sabia que tinha isso até agora, o que eu imediatamente contei a ela. Bem, ela me odeia, diz que “eu arruinei a vida dela”. Ela está tendo um mau “OB”. Ela não pode fazer o teste para ter certeza até sexta-feira, mas nós dois temos certeza de que é isso mesmo. Tenho uma enorme sensação de culpa e estou loucamente apaixonado por essa mulher. Estou tentando dar espaço a ela, mas também não consigo imaginar a ideia de ficar sem ela. Também sou diagnosticado com TEPT e ela foi a única mulher que me fez sentir seguro e feliz por um tempo. Não sei o que fazer, pois não tenho muitas pessoas com quem conversar além dela. Ela não sabe se pode continuar comigo porque me culpa por isso, mesmo que eu não soubesse que tinha isso. Tenho certeza de que é só tempo que ela precisa, mas minha ansiedade está muito alta. Só estou procurando palavras de sabedoria, suponho, obrigado!
Sorry to hear you're going through this. I believe you've come to the right place though! Seems like lots of people find the words they need here.
When I self diagnosed while I was waiting for my dr appt to arrive (5 days later), I was devestated when I realized the bumps turned to blisters and what that meant. I was in ROUGH shape for about 2 days. From what I read in forums (mostly here and Reddit), people are strangely nearly universally devestated to the point of thinking their life is over, myself included. In fact, this is one of the things that helped me through it, that and reading forum comments from people who are beyond that stage (weeks, months, years, decades) who have felt that way and now feel it's no big deal at all.
So, here's what else helped me? :
Time (diagnosed Oct 17)
My supportive boyfriend who sees no reason to change our sex life, but is also fine if during ob, we just 'make love with my undies on' if things are sensitive. I told him how this made me feel better and how I'm happy he doesn't find me unattractive and I felt even better he seemed confused I questioned he would find me attractive.
Education on transmission rates, how to reduce them to nearly 0% chance and treatments
Education on how many people have GH 1or2 (25%) and 60% oral hsv1.
I would hardly care at all if I already had kids, or didn't plan on having any. maybe she can find comfort in that if she doesn't want or already has kids?
Online stories of people who go on to have kids, keep or find love and live happy lives.
My suggestion: if you feel she needs space, and any of this strikes a cord with you, pass it on to her. So she has space if she wants, write her a letter. Sounds to me, you don't find her any less attractive, be sure to let her know. Tell her some of how you feel comfortable and safe with her (saying something good about her might make her feel better and also to assure her you're still at her side and in this together). Tell her, even if it is HSV, it's not the end of the world. Tell her you're not happy about it either, but you don't see any reason for your relationship to change and you see many great days ahead for you two, if she will allow it. If you haven't already, be sure to say you're sorry if you did give it to her.
Hope some of this helps! Hang in there, keep your chin up.
Obrigado, Sarah.
Eu ainda não processei realmente o fato de eu ter HSV. Eu ainda não tive um surto, então talvez quando eu tiver, isso mude minha visão.
Eu me importo mais em ajudá-la a passar por isso. Não, ela não é menos bonita para mim aos meus olhos. É difícil dizer, mas mesmo que fosse algo que ela tivesse antes e me contasse, eu ainda a amaria da mesma forma. Encontrar uma conexão com alguém é muito mais profundo do que isso, na minha humilde opinião.
Fico feliz que você e seu namorado consigam passar por isso e sejam felizes como nunca!
Yea, it sounded like you were either handling your diagnosis very well, or not yet processed it. :-). My boyfriend was pretty calm about it too, though he has never had symptoms and didn't know he had it till my ob.
A couple things I forgot to mention might help your lady:
I've read Oragel is good for numbing ob pain. Apply right to genitals, apparently. Would help her out till she gets to a doc.
If her urine burns, make sure she's drinking enough water, around half her weight in oz... For ex: she's 140 lb = 70oz water.
Keep the area dry. Pat dry after shower. I've read of using baby or talcum powder or cornstarch.
There's other homeopathic remedies too, such as lemon balm tea wash, salt baths, lemon balm/Melissa officinalis essential oil (diluted with carrier oil), olive leaf oral supplement, neem plant supplement, eccinacea herb supplement.
She will also find relief with ingesting Cayenne or Licorice (oils mixed with water). This helps as well as the ounces of water equal to half your body weight. This is a hard thing to deal with but if you communicate your way through it things will brighten up.
Stay true ♡♡♡
Your story was particularly touching and I'm hoping to hear things are going better? Best wishes