Hi all,
Hope you are all coping well and managing as best you can.
I sometimes write on here (quite irregularly) just to write about what im thinking and get it off my chest. At the moment things are pretty good. I have been sleeping without alcohol for the past week, been productive at work, been to the gym, took my first trip abroad (Norway, lovely) etc. I write because although its something i have known for a while it seems to weigh heavy on mme recently. I have no friends!
Over the years my problem (and it still is a problem although at times i have it under control), or due to my general personality (i hope not) has meant that i have lost girlfriends and friends and workmates regularly. it's my fault as i can be argumentative, embarrasing etc when drunk (not always), but still it hurts when people who act like friends don't invite you places they are going.
Extremely lonely at the moment and am drinking tonight alone again. Sometimes when i feel strong I i don't care about what others think. I know I'm a nice person but sometimes i don't fit into the caucasian middle class millenial box that people around me seem to be in. But it does hurt when people shun you. Over the years i have been disinvited to weddings, funerals and any other gathering you can imagine, as i might get drunk and say the wong thing/fall asleep.
Anyway just rambling. People can do one if they can't see what we have to offer. More fool them x