My name is Melanie and on January 9, 2014 my mother passed away very unexpetedly. My mom and I were extremely close, we were best friends, mother and daughter, soul mates! So as I'm sure you can imagine and I'm sure you already know being that you've probably also suffered a traumatic loss, my heart has yet to mend. I've always suffered with depression, but after my mothers death is has taken over my life. I don't leave my house that often at all, unless I absolutely have to. I can go months without showering and even brushing my hair or teeth. I have lost all desires to even tend to my house, the little energy that I do have left I use in the mornings getting my ten year old and five year old fed, dressed and off to school then after that I feel beat, as if I ran a marathon. I literally have nothing left to give after that. I don't have any energy or excitment in me, I don't play with my kids like they want and need me to, and I know that my depression is making my relationship with my babies suffer greatly!!!! On top of the depression I'm also fighting against my addiction which I am in treatment for. I am in a methadone program, which I've been in about three years, I have been clean since I started the program over three years ago, I haven't relapsed or even had any desires to use which is a great thing!!! However, I am in the class of what you would refer to as a duel diagnosis, my depression and addiction go hand in hand and they feed eachother. I don't know why I waited this long to persue help for my depression, maybe it was because of my depression that I just couldn't force myself to get up and go, maybe it was fear, because ever since I got clean the motion of even taking a pill and putting it up to my mouth makes my skin crawl. Or maybe it's because of my mothers death, because the autopsy came back with slim traces of methadone and xanax in her system, which those two drugs togher even at a very low does is a DEADLY combo. She literally could have only taken one pill of each drug and it could have kiled her. The medical examiner didn't say that, that is what ultimately killed my mother but it's obvious it played a huge part in her illness in life and in her death. OR maybe I didn't go because of all of those factors put together, I don't really know why, and I know that I can't beat myself up trying to figure it out either, because I'm a worry wart enough as it is I don't need any added stuff to think and worry about on my plate. But anyway, I started seeing the psychiatrist FINALLY this past Tuesday and he started me on 50mg of Zoloft a day. For the first week he has me taking 25mg just to get it gradually introduced in my body then next Tuesday I'll start taking a whole tablet. The doctor told me that it will take a good month for it to start really working not to get discouraged and to really give it a fair chance and wait it out the four to six weeks. He also stated that after the first month I may need an increase in mg, which I'm hoping wont be the case, but if it is then it is. Anyway, I am just trying to get a feel for the drug from other people that are also on it, and see what their experience is or has been. How long did it typically take for other people to start feeling the medication was doing it's job? Was there any unbarable side effects that people dealt with while starting the medication? Are there people out there that just didn't like the medication at all it just didn't work for them? I just want to know what to expect, you know how the doctors and pharmacists are about telling you about the drug and stuff, they tell you text book info, but most of them aren't actually on the drug themselves and they never have been to technically they can't really tell me what I really need and want to know. So I'm reaching out to people who like me are on the medication in hopes of hearing their personal accounts of the medication both good and bad. Thank you in advance and God bless!
Hi
Melanie,
You have to be so careful how you put things so before I say anything, please be aware, and I'm sure you are, I am not advising on you what to do...just giving you a taste of my experiences.
I think I am a sensible person and an, myself, taking Sertraline to help me with my CFS/ME.
I only take the lowest dose, 50mg a day, (in the am on a full stomach). I was advised not to take it at night as it would keep me awake possibly ??
I asked to go on it and doc agreed. I chose to take 25mg for 2 weeks, first of all, because I wanted to give myself the best chance of continuing on it.
After 2 weeks the nausea subsided and I felt some changes in my eyes; They seemed wide open and I had a really good feeling inside; all positive.
Week 3 I increased the Dose to 50mg and I have been on it for nearly 45 weeks now.
Because I am sofa bound most of the time, I have had leg cramps; I'm not using my legs that much as I struggle to stand on them. That's the ME.
I want to start doing small walks with the dog but you need your legs !!
On a good day, I shall try it.
I lost my Mum too in 2011 and cared for in the last year of her life. Like yourself, I was devastated at the end because I had tried so hard to take care of her and in the last month of her life she was abused at a care home and then at the local hospital in the last week. I never thoughtI would get over it but, you know, my husband and my children brought me through it and somehow, I now only have happy memories.
Life goes on and we are here for our chikdren now.
They need us to best there for them in any way we can.
I talk to my children every week without fail because they are now going through pressures too, studying.
Hang in there as you are doing...
There are some wonderful people on this site who will share their experiences with you and I am sure you will appreciate reading them and keeping in touch just as I do
best wishes
Jinny 💝
Sorry Mel
Typing error!
5 weeks I've been on Sert.
Hi Melanie
first of all I am so sorry about your loss, secondly well done on being clean for three years you should be very proud of yourself.
your heart will mend and you will come to terms with the loss.
your children need you to be a mum they need you to play and love them, you must take care of yourself for their sakes as well as your own.
i am on 100 mcg daily Zoloft sertraline, the first few weeks were awful side effects were worse than the depression, but I got over it, I didn't shower or brush my teeth, I was so ill, I had horrible thoughts and didn't want to be here, that's now gone, I still have really bad buzzing in my ears , wether that's down to the medication or the menopause I don't know, used to get very dry mouth and sweating was really bad, but I have made it through and can now function on a daily basis, I go into supermarkets and pubs and have a social life again, I am 80% better than I was which is great.
you will get through this, you have proved to yourself that you got of your addiction, and you will get through this.
i wish you all the luck in the world, and keep posting on here, there is a lovely bunch of people. 😃