Living in Misery

Sexual health
1

Dont mean to sound so dramatic, but about five days ago I had pain while urinating, after 2 rounds of antibiotics and a second trip to the ER for what everyone though was a UTI, cultures and samples all negitive. I was diagnosed with genital herpes. The kicker, is I was with someone for 22 years and we split over two years ago. I had sex with one other man about 2 years ago we had a few trysts. Other than this I have remained non sexually active for a year and a half now.

I have never felt so much pain. I was prescribed Valtrax and was told this will most definitely help alleviate symptoms. But may take a few days. I am on day 6 of this and can barely pee with out feeling like I might throw up and or pass out. This is the worst I have felt ever. I am taking Advil for pain but todays poking has inflamed everything.I have just a few lesions.. I meant to ask for a cream that could do some numbing, but forgot. Please please any home remedies while I deal with this physically. Im in so much pain I cant even deal with the mental turmoil I need to face . I was told blood work and swabs take 10 days to confirm, but two drs said it looked textbook. She said that I may have gotten this ions ago and never felt the outbreak?

swollen lymph glands the burning, the pain, difficulty urinating, lesions

I feel so awful..agony to be honest

Thanks

2

I am a 33 year old woman who was also recently diagnosed a month ago. It took two weeks to three weeks for the pain to subside and I was just like you , crying while peeing, it is no joke. I was lucky, my doctor gave me strong pain meds like Percocet. I suggest only taking one of those a day, do not exceed that amount, but that's just my opinion. The Percocet defiantly took the sting of out the pee. However, after a week, I threw my Percocet's away because I knew I was going to have to learn how to start dealing with the pain on my own with no help, so all I did after that was put Vaseline and Neosporin. Please wash hands after you do that thoroughly and make sure no one else ever use's the Vaseline that you use. I also took the Valtrex everyday.

More so than anything, what I did was, use my nutribullet that I bought a long time ago. It cost me $100.00 and was the best investment I ever made, however, I never used it. When I got herpes, I started using it. In the recipe book that you get for free is the immune strengthening chapter. I did the recipe of orange, collard greens, almonds (all fresh) because it has the most vitamin A and it's the cheapest out of all the recipes. It is a BLAST of vitamin A that we need. Drink one of those every single day and you will see how fast it clears up.

Remember, your first outbreak is always your worst. It's not your fault that you got herpes , and in a few months, you won't even think about it anymore. RELAX. It's not that big a deal.

3

ugh, I just saw so many typos in my comment. 'Defiantly' is suppose to be definitely. Hopefully, the rest you can just figure out.

4

Hi

A Shallow warm bath every time you need to >.< if you can't do this pour warm water over yourself whilst you are urinating.

and DW! I only suffered once! like that, that was the first outbreak.

Get better soon x

5

As for mental trauma, I first contracted over 20 yrs ago now. Mostly I have found info through the GUM clinics and doctors, as the internet was not so in our lives back then......

I am a little distraught having found some discussions today on this topic! at the content and myths I am reading!

You basically have contracted a virus that is from the same family as Chcken pox. It lives in your spine and lays dormant mostly. just like Chicken pox does! some folks are unlucky with Chicken pox and that re occurs too! (shingles in later life!)

Herpes "can" reoccur and is contagious by delicate skin contacting a lesion (i.e. skin to skin contact) NOW by my very painful experience (long story won't bore you!) the GUM are very unsuccessful of being able to cultivate a swab of this virus UNLESS the swab is taken in day 1 - 4 of the lesion breaking out and quite often gives a negative result as it didn't cultivate. That to me screams out the period in which you are contagious is far far less than I thought for over a decade!

Herpes only affects me in the sense of................ from time to time ( and years can pass in between!) ,,,,,,,, I have a herpes headache!..... and I abstain from sexual contact below my waist for a couple of weeks..... Thats it no big deal tbh. I also generally pick up the symptoms of the outbreak before the lesion appears which gives me confidence in its control.

The only other advice I would like to add is talk to the Doc and GUM clinics don't be shy ask if any of the doctors at the clinic specialize in this Virus (generally only one does!) If swabs come back negative seek out a blood test / actually tell em to stuff the swabs! they only cause more pain, more lesions! go seek out how to obtain a blood test kit and march in there with that >.< (UK - nhs will not blood test - in fact one clinic denied it existed - i took much pleasure marching in there, kit in hand - for them to draw blood for it, for me to send off - with a little verbal education to them from me to them, as well! ...... So if your in the UK the test exists but you have to buy/source it privately)

Don't believe all you are reading on the net! seek good sound advice from professionals and / or support groups. Honestly those that have had it for years probably know more than the Doc's and I have had Docs tell me this is so! It was a support group - UK charity where i was able to source a blood test from.

It really isn't as bad as we think! and when we learn not to think of it as being bad we get better and it stays dorment!

Salt washes if u can handle it will get u thru this first bout the quickest (tho have a non salt wash ready! in case the salt wash is too much for you just now )

6

Just re read Abby, can i reassure you

(tho i agree keep the vaseline etc away from others - just on a hygiene / cleanliness thought!)

The virus cannot survive without the body, it cannot survive on sheets, towels, soaps etc it is only passed by skin to skin contact without the body the virus dies.....

7

Thank you so much a hundred times over. I am trying to process all of this best I can. I have children and was worried if I somehow passed it to them. Im just shocked really.. I understand its like having a cold sores down there but its still scares me..especially when I see more developing and no relief in sight.. I cant barely walk

The pain is brutal! If it wasn't so painful I could deal with this better..I wished I had read this before but of course I did not know I was in this spot of trouble.. Since she swabbed me today I noticed a few more sores spread now to my vulva and some nasty bigger ones where she poked around, I am not sure but I think I even have one in my arse..Is that possible!!??. I have been using a warm bath with epson salts, and polysporin. Taking advil for pain for now. Its awful. I try to make sure hands are clean and i use sanitizer also. I am about five days into this.. I am trying to wrap my head around the thought of being in pain like this for the next three weeks. The dr seemed to think the antiviral would help in a day or two.. Im so desperate for relief I swear Every time I pee I will pass out from the pain.. Im at a point where I am certain to develope a long term fear of bathrooms!!! I just can't believe this happened...

8

The pain IS brutal. That's why I suggested asking your doctor for stronger pain meds. I had the sores all over my vagina , my arse and my thighs, that's how bad I had it. Guess what? After three weeks of treatment, Valtrex and doing the nutribullet, they were completely GONE. Not even a trace. Even without doing the nutribullet, they still would have cleared.

9

Also Valtrex takes a while, but just think if the medicine didn't exist. It would last much longer than a few weeks. Plus, your's could go away in less than three weeks. You have to stop freaking out, lay in bed all day, every day until it clears up if you can. Do you have a fever? I had a 103 degree fever , that was horrible. Your immune system is trying to fight what you got, the herpes. Give it time.

10

I truly understand, that first hit is terrible! so long ago but I remember not being able to walk! Do they not give a cream that is a local anesthetic anymore? thou tbh I did the bath thing every time! once i found its relief, then you are showering / washing afterwards and the routine of cleaning really helps! to a fast recovery.

The other idea they gave me was a straw! which did sort of work, i guess... i prefered the bath tho. (just nuff water to cover your genitals not a full bath I use to have my top still on!)

Let me assure you after this occurrence, you will never again suffer this much! One lesion may pop up and you will tell it to F right off and deal with it stop it from creating more and be over any discomfort in 2 - 3 days if not sooner. You probably won't suffer them in the areas that are affected when you take a pee either so this pain will hopefully not reoccur for you in the future like this. The anti Viral should help with the pain in your glands.

For now that probably doesn't help - if you can take it salt wash - pint of warm water with salt dissolved pour it over yourself and pat dry (plse don't forget a back up of plain water, just in case!) and where possible stay at home and repeat hourly / often. This is the quickest way to dry out the sores and come back to normal. If you can spend the day in just a towel / skirt and let the air circulate too this will help to dry them out quicker. If you can't salt wash just warm water every hour will help as you wash the active virus away and stop the spread of more.

Ok I am remembering the first time for me and perhaps salt wash would be too harsh! just warm water even dousing and pat drying often will help. But remember salt washes in the future, at first signs this method works x

Yes it's quite normal for lesions to be near/around/ your anus, DW

My child is now a teenager, I gave birth to him naturally tho I had an outbreak at the time of delivery (ofc under medical advice). I have been swimming with him often when he was little and didn't let a small outbreak stop me, after researching it was ok he has never contracted Herpes from me.

Don't put to much pressure on yourself, take time off get yourself back to health, eat well, sleep well. concentrate on healing and let your head work out the rest once your better. x

11

Hi id just like to share my story with you im 24 years old and got diagnosed about 3 months ago i had a big infection in my mouth and no one knew what it was i was prescribed 3 different kinds of antibiotics that did nothing but cleared up after 2 weeks the next day i started to get blisters and ulcers on my lady parts i counted 6 on my own but i though oh it will go its just bad thrush because of the antibiotics i coped with 5 days on my own in absolute agony i couldnt take no more so i went to docs and explained but they took a look and said its herpes. They sent me to gum clunic the next day to make sure and get swabbed i was in that much pain being swabbed i was screaming the nurse said i actually had around 10 sores but knew it was herpes before she even done any swabs.

I broke down there i have been with the same partner for almost 5 years and never had so much as a coldsore but my partner used to suffer with them i was told i most likely got it from him through oral sex but because he has antibodies againt the virus already he would most likely never get blisters or sores for genetal herpes that i would have past on to him.

Although i knew how i had got it i felt so dirty i pushed him away and blamed him in a way for giving it to me but with lots of research and him always being there even though he was taking the brunt of it all i realised its not all that bad it could be worse it took me about a month to get my head around it but after 3 days of being on meds and having instillagel the pain was so much easier to cope with.

Salt baths are so good they sooth and clean your sores i have a 3 year old girl and was so scared of passing it on iv became a little ocd especially when i have an outbreak so i got some hand gel that i take everywhere but the nurse reassured me and said i would have passed on antibodies to her phew :-)

Teatree oil helps with healing it does sting a little at first but does really help and so do putting cold wet teabags on your sores.

Now to have a pee i got a new washing up bowl and filled it with warm salty water and squatted low enough so my bits were covered by the water and had pee in that so i always have that bowl just incase.

Iv found i have an outbreak everytime i have sex but it lasts about 3 days and its gone again usually without having to take meds.

The mental and physical side do get better just give yourself time to heal and come to terms with having herpes you learn when you are about to have an outbreak so you can start meds straight away they really do help but you should have been given some cream to numb painkillers did nothing for me.

Its not nice to have herpes but it could be so much worse theres people out there that do have worse so keep your head up put your feet up and rest for a while resting helps mental and physical side. But you will be ok hun xx

12

Hey there

Thanks again for all the advice. I have tried the tea tree oil and find it oddly soothing rather than burning like I thought it would. I have just 3 sores that are making it difficult to urinate but the pain is so intense nothing seems to help. I prob have about 8 to 10 sores in a variety of places down there all together. Tried Vaseline, polysporin with numbing agents, zinc cream, nothing, and everything. I have twisted my self into positions that no one should have to try to simply void. I keep the area clean with antibacterial soap, I use a hair dryer to dry and lose pants, lay around in bed because I feel like crap anyway. How long does it take the sores to finally start to heal or go away. Ive been this way for a week. I thought for sure I would se some relief. I am taking the valtrax and Advil and tylenol. I am also eating kale, and carrots for extra vitamin A

I find the sore lymph glands in my groin area painful as well. I realize this is partly has to run its course thing but how long till I can expect to see improvement.

I am sometimes dealing with the mental aspect of it, but don't think I can till i get through a healing process physically first. I think right now hearing from everyone and knowing I am NOT alone has been my saviour. I read and re read so many of the stories here.. Thanks for listening to me..

13

I started to feel a difference in pain after 3 days of meds but it was very slighty and im on different meds to you so im not sure if yours could take a little longer resting is good though so your not over doing anything its good for your body to just focus on healing.

Iv been taking vitamins for my immune system you can get bassett vitamins that focus just on your immune system to help build it up thats good for future outbreaks apart from anything i said in my previos comment im not really sure of another way to help you but salt baths are good and relaxing just a handful of normal food salt in a warm bath and just lie there

I really hope it starts easing off soon although the first outbreak can last for 4 weeks i hope for you it doesnt though and you can start working on mentally dealing with it xx

14

I have herpes and it was so so so painful in the beginning that was 3 months ago and I have had a ob every month since and I would take 3 days worth of valtrex and it clear it up! But I don't like taking meds so I been experiment and I found the best thing ever that works it's called witch hazel the kind for face and skin it really cheap you can buy it at walmart are dollar stores what you do is at the first sight of a ob , feeling dirty are that tingle are burning feeling soak some in witch hazel in some cotton balls are toilet paper I mean have it dripping wet and apply to your prix area now if your female like me it will burn for just a second then the burning stops and you feel itch  free and clean feeling now don't wipe bcuz u can spread the ob just day if using cotton balls you can squeeze the witch hazel out and onto skin! This will block the ob from every getting bad and can prevent it from coming on ! I started to get on and did this the min I first started a ob and I will use witch  3 times a day for like 3 days so far it's working!  And no meds 

15

Hope your all better now sad I've never suffered with anything like that & just wanted to ask you if Condoms would have prevented this ? Or is it just contact with skin with someone who's already ? but If theyre already infected wouldn't you see the evidence like your describing?

16

I just want to share my experience with you all. I was diagnosed with this this week. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about a year now. We are both very safe and neither of us showed symptoms. He had been tested (blood) in the past and it came up negative. I have a feeling this was passed on to me through him via cold sore during oral sex (a small one that he didn't even realize he had).

I have been on Valtrex for three days now and have seen my lesions have gone down immensely. To describe my symptoms and how it all started: last weekend my right inner labia became really itchy in one spot (the area where hair didn't grow, yet I thought it was because hair was growing back after I had shaved down there) and didn't think much of it. A day later I noticed that same area had been bleeding a bit. I figured it was because I scratched so hard.

The next day I started noticing white little bumps. Thankfully it was just on the right side of my vagina, nowhere near my opening though. I went to the clinic and the doctor said it was most likely a yeast infection and prescribed me Canes Oral. I took that thinking it would go away. The next day the lesions started flaring up more, with no signs of healing. That night I went to sleep and realized that I was actually in a lot of pain, so I thought ok this isn't right. I took the day off and went back to the clinic and saw a different doctor as my original doctor wasn't working. At this point the right side of my vagina was double the size of my left, and it was hard to sit without feeling as if I was going to puncture or hurt myself. 

One look at me and she said "Yes that's herpes". I immediately started crying. I couldn't believe the words. It has been a very hard and traumatic experience for me. However, she prescribed me the meds and I can honestly say after 3 full days on it along with some pain killers, I haven't felt any pain. It is now still swollen but the lesions are going away and I know I will feel like myself again in a few days.

What really helped me in these 2-3 days is ice packs. I would sleep on the couch with an ice pack between my legs (the couch helps because it forces you to sleep with your legs a bit open), and it gave me the ability to sleep without feeling much pain. Drink lots of water. Get a lot of rest. I do not wish the pain on my worst enemy at all, but as soon as you feel something is wrong, go to your doctor asap so you get the medication. Thankfully I have a strong immune system so it started fighting it with the meds soon after I started taking them.

For me now the difficulty is coming to terms with this. What has helped me get through this is the support of my boyfriend. He had been there for me since Day 1 and understood what I needed and took the days off from work with me so he could be by my side. In all honesty this has made our relationship stronger. And this virius/skin condition (because it really is just a skin condition) is going to make my body even stronger. It's giving me the opportunity to kick ass.

I think this is all about having the right perspective. You have this now and there's not much you can do about it, but the support from others/loved ones is what really helps you get through it. Keep your head high, and remember that this will pass.

 

17

This post is from a year ago. How are you today Nodeal?

18

I have found manuka raw honey amazing, also using tea tree oil. The both sing initially, but I think the honey really works. I also place a black tea bag that has steeped on the sore skin. It is soothing. Google the honey, it's been used alot for this with good results

19

To ease the pain of peeing, I bought a plastic bottle, the type used for hair coloring, and fill with water. I spray the area with water, which dilutes the urine and takes away some of the sting. I've also read to drink a lot of fluids, which also dilutes the urine. The bottle was the best solution for me.

20

If you still have it something is definitely wrong ...why am I even getting alerts for this posts this sits is impossible to get rid 😁