i am a 19 year old girl with extreme anxiety. at the very least, generalized anxiety disorder. i am going insane. i want to be so many things and i want to be creative and artsy and read lots of books, but i can never find the motivation (this has been happening since i was probably 13) and it is so frustrating. i want to be a creative person and i just feel stuck. i want to be smart. i want to know movies. i want to know politics. i want to be as knowledgeable as i know i can be. i feel like i am insane. i have for as long as i can remember. i don’t know why i’m like this. i’m scared of my own mind. i get so anxious i dissociate and completely lose touch with reality and when i snap back into it things feel so weird and i get this weird tingly feeling. i have terrible thoughts about death all the time and other weird things that i don’t know why i think about and my mind is against me. i’m scared to drink for fear i am going to say something super f*cked up. or being given drugs for my wisdom teeth making me say something really f*cking weird. i don’t know what to do. i have seen therapists and they all don’t understand. medication simply doesn’t help. i want to be normal and i want to know things and read things and every time i try i give up immediately. it takes almost as much energy as running a marathon i swear. i don’t get it. please help.
Hey Madsun I to am only 19 and right now I too have been struggling with anxiety although my symptoms are physical which leads me to believe I have health anxiety I also come here seeking help I to suffer thoughts dying and I'm always worrying bout health now and can't see a therapist or get a primary care for medication due to me being unemployed broke and living with my aunt but I'm still gonna try to fight these symptoms and feelings as I don't wanna give up anyways all I can offer is the reassurance that you your not alone I wish you the best of luck and hope you can overcome your anxiety as I to am trying
hey! i hope that things get better for you too. my anxiety is very physical too, it’s hard to sleep at night with it because i am so tense, and i can’t relax. you don’t have insurance? it should cover therapy! thank you for your comment, i really appreciate it. things will get better!
Unfortunately no I don't have insurance otherwise believe me id try and get therapy also would have tryed to get me a primary care but that doesn't stop me from trying everyday at night most of the times I try to listen to meditations on YouTube to help me sleep I also come to this site for reassurance if even if it barley helps its better than nothing thanks reply
hope things do get better