With all the doubts and anxiety I have it’s hard to see my gf suffer and support me. She’s been there for me every step of the way and this depression has been going on for 5 months I’ve been in and out of the psychiatrist office and I’m starting therapy Monday.. I don’t wanna lose this girl but with all the doubts it’s hard to seperate my real feelings from the depression. I don’t know what else to do I try and put on a smile for her and act like everything is okay but I’m just fighting inside my mind with all these unwanted thoughts. It’s really hard for me to love her fully when I’m dealing with all my mental problems. Before the depression I was so damn happy with this girl and we planned our lives out together I’ve been feeling this way for so long that it’s become a part of me and I absolutely hate seeing it mess with my relationship. I feel like sometimes I don’t deserve her she’s been so damn supportive for me and everything was perfect before the depression. I go from good days to extremely bad moments I’m going on my 7th week of my AD and it’s been so hard.
I am the partner of someone suffering the at you are and it’s very hard to watch someone you love suffer. She loves you like I love my man and I’m so hoping it’s the depression and not real as we were so happy before this. It’s just like my partner has had a mental block on his feelings for me but he does show me love physically which really does help. Some days he’s not the man I fell for but others he is, I guess it’s just time that will tell. I hope we all get sorted as I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. If you can’t show your love perhaps but her a gift to show you appreciate her support at this awful time 😔
Things will get better I’ve read on this forum so many times how much relationships are so hard with depression. With that being said, I’ve read how people are in my position and after the depression has cleared feelings and thoughts go back to normal and they are in their happy relationships again. In my experience it’s like a numb feeling where you can’t feel the love which is a scary place to be. Hang in there because I know my girlfriend has suffered quite a bit with this and for her to stick by me through one of the hardest things I’ve ever gone through says quite a lot.
I am doing my best. Keep me updated on you too