Hi,
I am going to try and keep this as short as I can because I could potentially say so much but i dont want to bore you all. I am 24 years old and it all started last year when i had a ‘lump’ in my throat and difficulty swallowing and slight pain. I had never experienced this before so i made the biggest mistake of my life and googled. Obv i had cancer and being an ex smoker i thought it to be 100% true. I went into a very rapid downward spiral of googling and literally doing nothing confined to my bedroom filled with so much sadness and dread. I was depressed and felt helpless. anything the doctor would say i would doubt because of course i’ve read diagnosis stories!! And seen how people get misdiagnosed!
A bit of background I’ve have 7 very close family members have cancer so when that statement of cancer is ‘rare’ appears in my mind it just does not register.I feel as if my chances are high. Since last year i thought i had all these illnesses:
Mouth cancer
Throat cancer
MS
ALS/MND
seizures
brain tumour
pancreatic cancer
stomach cancer
bowel cancer
nose cancer
Hip cancer
blood clots in leg
And my current one cancer in my leg (sarcoma) for about a month my knee has been in pain..the back of it feels like its being stretched and my thigh is pain from time to time. I google people getting diagnosed and their stories and watch videos. And scare myself to the point of being miserable again. Yesterday i was convinced i could feel a lump.
Any time someone dies i need to know exactly how or what they had…any new illness i hear off i have to google and know the symptoms.
I don’t trust my body any more. I cant even look at my body sometimes because its a trigger and i want to start feeling for lumps or check if one leg is smaller than the other. Its so strange because prier to health anxiety i never went to the doctors ever! Felt so healthy and happy and now every morning starts with me praying the pain or feeling is gone. And it feels like my body is just going through one ‘illness’ after another.
I want my body to just feel normal again with now supposed illness.
I’m drained i cant enjoy life..there’s so much more i could say but my main point of this..is can anyone offer any advice? I’m desperate. Ive done CBT but that didn’t help. I’m desperate..Please if anyone could reply that would be amazing
hey dont be upset i had the same problem i had gasitris and acid reflux which i thought i would had a heart attack any time soon my age is 20 lol i googled everything like ■■■■ even my doctor hated me he said that i dont have anything to worry about and he sended me to take ecgs which came to be normal i can tell you that is not easy at all to stop worrying but it can be handle try to be relax and do what you like eat healty think positive what did your doctors say about illness and did you had any tests
hey
I hear you loud and clear, this is me also. my health anxiety is ruining my life. I google every single symptom and this makes me worse but I just cant help myself. like you I’ve convinced myself I’ve had
pancreatic cancer
bowel cancer
stomach cancer
ovarian cancer
esophageal cancer
throat cancer
mouth cancer
mnd/Als
dementia
my main fear at the moment is mnd I’m literally obsessed with it. I suffer with muscle twitches/body spasms and I too have problems with my throat. I really focus on my swallowing and feel like I have to much saliva and that I’m going to choke on it. I think it’s all in my head but other times I’m not to sure I’m so frightened I have mnd. I recently went to see a pysio as I have problems with my joints and she said I have brisk reflexes, I could remember reading that mnd causes brisk reflexes and I was nearly hysterical .recently a colleagues mum died of pancreatic cancer and I was asking him what her symptoms were, how awful am i that all I was thinking about was myself, I do this all the time. so believe me you are not alone. I would give anything for peace of mind. yours to me really sounds like bad anxiety, I’ve too tried cbt and it didnt work. I think I’m too far gone lol. anyway big hugs to you xxx
hello!
I am 23 and exactly the same!
having had previous health problems doesnt help either, as I convince myself that anything can happen!
I’ve recently become a mum and that’s made it so much worse! I’m in a constant state of fear that somethings doing to happen!
if you need anyone to speak too I’m always hear to talk!
All the best!
hello!
I am 23 and exactly the same!
having had previous health problems doesnt help either, as I convince myself that anything can happen!
I’ve recently become a mum and that’s made it so much worse! I’m in a constant state of fear that somethings doing to happen!
if you need anyone to speak too I’m always hear to talk!
All the best!
Hi Helpme101
Sorry to hear about what you are going through currently. I am 33 years old and can totally relate to you.
I fell ill early 2019 (nothing too serious) and it wore me down for the following 2/3 months. I didnt like to leave the house nor do anything that i used to enjoy.
Slowly surely i got back to 50/60% of how i used to be, but unfortunately now I have the same feelings as you as above. I am very aware of my body and even a little pain causes me concern. bad habit of googling its the worst. I have had plenty of blood tests in the last 12/14 months and all clear except vitamin D.
But it doesnt help, as I keep thinking I have a cancer, heart issue or something each time i feel something.
The most recent one is feeling like my legs are weak or heavy and allsorts of muscle twitching going on makes me think i have MND ALS or something! Terrifying!
So totally understand what you are going through and its good to talk.
hey totally get where you are coming from. mnd is so rare like 0.0 something chance but still its what sticks in my mind too.
i keep testing my muscles for strength. they feel weak but then i can still walk and use them and then when i stand they feel heavy. and then the twitching happens a lot at rest its crazy. feel like my bones and ankles hurt too!
Doctor advised vitamin D and other stuff but we prefer google damn it
yes my legs and arms feel heavy too and ache all the time, I’ve become really aware of walking and frighten I trip as I will think I have foot drop as this is also a symptom of mnd. this is all from googling, I’ve literally scared myself to death. x
hey im pretty sure its nothing as mnd is really really rare. but with health anxiety i guess it doesnt help because you always think the worse
do you get muscle twitches in the calves and thighs etc as well? joint pain?
I get muscle twitches all over my body, but they do come and go and I ve had them for years. very bad joint pain, again had for years, suffer a lot with back and hip and leg pain