If only I was the only one to suffer because of menopause. How I wish this was over! On top of all of my misery I feel so guilty when I shut down because of Peri...
I suffer with depression anyway off and on but I have suffered worse being peri menopausal. It's awful.
If there is anyone else in my boat I would be glad to hear.
My family has suffered when these symptoms started to get the best of me. In some ways they still suffer. My anxiety is hard. When I get in that mode and panic over how I feel and I'm not comfortable being alone, my family thinks I'm going nuts. But as I learn more of what's going on with my body, they are starting to understand that it's not in my head. I too shut down when I feel out of sorts. I promised to take my little one to the movies this evening and I'm already dreading the trip. I'd rather be at home where I'm comfortable, but I wouldn't dare dissapoint her. It's really hard and I wish I could tell you that it's not. I feel guilty all the time. The one thing I can tell you is that one day you will get back to being yourself. It's going to take some time. I have to reassure myself every day of that. You are not alone. We will get through it.
Yes im in the same boat - depression & peri and its horrendous xxx
I know exactly what you are saying. I had to put my 4 year old in daycare because I don't want him to see me in this condition thinking something is wrong with mommy. I cry so much and he is sensitive to everything that is going on with me. My poor husband has gone from having a wife to having an invalid at times. My mother is worried that I am dying of something and my older children who are grown just think mom has gone off the deep end and worry that they wont ever have their old mom back. It is awful but I have faith we will come out stronger than before. Savor your good days and when they come, spend it with your family. That is what I do, and it seems to help a bit.
My mom had a horrible experience with it all in her 40s... her panic and anxiety were so bad that she couldn't be alone, was scared to drive, cried frequently, etc. I have always hoped that my experience wouldn't be as bad, but I have had a good amount of panic and anxiety and pretty much had a total meltdown today. It makes me feel guilty, too, when I don't feel like enjoying time with family. They are incredibly patient, but I know it's rough on them, too. Cannot wait to see light at the end of this tunnel someday, it gets really dark sometimes.
Elizabeth, I agree with how it pulls the guilt out of you. I've felt guilty so many times, which does nothing to help the blue mood that comes.
So true, Snowbell. I don't have children, but my sister is divorced with two young sons and I help out with them a lot on weekends since she works a retail store job. They are good kids, but I can see the disappointment on their faces when I'm too tired to join in some of their activities. Still, I do find it helpful to be with them and we often will just relax and enjoy some TV programs and video games. They've been through a lot and we are a comfort to each other, but it's hard sometimes.
My mom went through the same thing. She was on so many pills because the docs kept saying she had bad nerves. She finally weened herself off those. She would run out of the room or house when her heart started racing. The funny thing is I remember it well but she didn't like docs so she really didn't go. I thought something was wrong with her. Her hot flashes were bad too. She rode it out with the exception of the pills for her nerves. She never heard of peri so she didn't know. Now all these things are happening to me except the hot flashes.
Wow, I know that must be tough to have to put your little one in daycare because of peri symptons. I explain it to my kids, (they're much older, but I hide the worst because I hate the idea of my kids having bad childhood memories. I have always been such a stubborn, (mind over matter) person and I'm really mad that I haven't been able to overcome this, hahahaha!
You know Elizabeth, I never had an issue with anxiety (although people around me did) till peri hit. It's so much worse than I thought it would be. I had a really bad meltdown last night and still had after shocks today, but by evening thank god I was fine. My family are so understanding and forgiving. It sounds stupid to say it, but I feel so guilty sometimes that I think I deserve some sort of punishment....I guess that's the depression and guilt speaking, I guess! lol
Hi yeah feel in the same boat here....I have a teenage daughter and 10 year old daughter and really feel for them and myself......sometimes its vry scary, it can feel like badness rising inside me and get scared I CD harm them.....they also see me crying etc, I want to feel love in my heart again and joy........anyone relate?
You're not alone. I have an amazing family and my hubby, (who deals with his own disabilities), is second to none. BUT I have this overwhelming guilt sometimes and feel like a burden because of how I feel about it.
It's ladies like yourself that make me feel 'normal' somedays. I hope it lifts for you soon x.
Oh my goodness, MoodyNoire, that is exactly how I feel!!! (Sorry if I sound a little too excited there, I know it's weird.) I've not heard anyone else say that before, but I'm the same way - I feel like I deserve punishment, too, for no real reason. The after shocks are scary, too. I woke up again in panic this morning and came to work with tears in my eyes feeling shaky with shallow breathing... don't know how I'll get through the visit with the gyn doctor tomorrow when she has the lab results back and makes her recommendations about having the ovary and mass removed. I am terrified. I just want to know that I'll be okay, and people keep telling me I will, but it's like I don't hear it.
Jamie, along with not liking docs, do you think she also didn't go because she was afraid? I am really struggling with that now after so many doctor visits over these last two months, and having to deal with the ovarian mass and upcoming surgery, I'm having panic attacks in doctors' waiting room and even had one during an ultrasound last week. I'm sorry that you are going through the same things, too, as I see that you and I both remember how hard this was for our mothers and you likely hoped as I did that yours would not be as bad as hers.
Hi Tropical, yes... I relate completely... just want to feel like myself again. Right there with you on the crying and trying really hard not to cry in front of my nephews, but I think they know something is wrong.
She may have been. I know I have. At first I was running to the docs now I don't want to go anywhere near the docs unless I have to. I had a panic attack in the office during my pap and a visit before that one I had a panic attack in the office. I was never like that before. I noticed that mines is just like hers but I think mines is a little worse. She said she didn't have some of the weird symptoms that I have.
Do any of you ladies take anti-depressanrs or anti-anxiety medication to help you through peri? I have panic attacks all the time, feel disconnected from everything and am really not myself anymore x
I know it's so hard to just, " keep on keeping on" isn't it? I mean, things that are so routine to others seem to be so traumatic at times. But you just have to keep in mind that going to the doctor is really proactive
Sometimes it's so hard to just, "keep on keepng on" isn't it? When it comes to important stuff (dr.visits) I really have to tell myself that there is no option about whether or not to go, because I will talk myself into cancelling. lol Most of the time our greatest fears never come to pass, thank god! But, not knowing is scarier to me. I try to put it a positive light. Instead of dreading the dr. visit, I try to think, oh I can't wait to get there and get it over with so I can either address the problem, or be told there's nothing to worry about. But, it's so stressful any way you look at it....
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