Need help to feel better...

Mental health
1

Here’s the short version.

I suffered from stomach issues for about 3 months (loose stools, nausea every time I ate). Doctors didn’t find anything wrong - I had just lost my job so my guess would be stress and anxiety. I didn’t stop eating but I decreased significantly because I just felt so sick all the time.

I only weighed about 95 lbs., I’ve always been petite. I lost 15 lbs. Now I’m only 80 and feel like I look terrible. No one can notice a significant difference but of course I can. I find myself weighing myself frequently because I’m so afraid of losing any more. I feel a TON of self blame and self hate for letting it happen. If only I had weighed myself then, I would’ve forced myself to eat more. It’s like 15 lbs. just got away from me so quickly. Now I feel like how am I ever going to get it back because I have such a hard time gaining. It literally took me my whole life to get to 95 lbs. and I don’t even know how I did it.

The good news is I’m starting to feel better and get somewhat of an appetite back. I’m eating full meals but sticking to kind of a bland diet for now. But…I’m at a stand still. Haven’t gained a pound back. My doctor said it would probably take 6 months-1 year to get back to somewhat where I was. Seems like an eternity.

2

you’ll get there! One day at a time. Please stop the self blaming and self hating. None of us are perfect and we do things or don’t do things that we regret. The important thing is that you are on the right track now and you should give yourself credit for that! You have to be your own best friend! Because the world is tough .
dont try to force weight gain. It will happen. Just be patient with yourself.
you would most likely benefit if you talked to a counselor about all of this. They can help you manage your anxiety and stress. Hope you feel better soon take care .

3

I am seeing a therapist. Thank you so much for your kind words!