So I have panic disorder, PTSD, and anxiety...I'm about to start a new job but I'm afraid my anxiety is going to get in the way. I've had full blown panic attacks and had to leave work at my last job. I would be in the bathroom puking and ready about to faint. The job before that I was a pharmacy tech, it was fast pace and making mistakes can only be slim to none in a pharmacy. If I made one mistake I would go into deep depression and obsess about making that mistake. It's distracting.
Lauren:
I truly do share your pain. I have the same anxiety about work. I am so afraid that stay up all night worrying that they will fire me over a mistake. i shake and also go to the bathroom and hyperventilate from fear.
I try to tell myself what is the worse that can happen? I made a mistake and if they do write me up I will live. I try praying and relaxation techniques. Good luck on the new job.
Happiness is but a stain upon my brow that I must make smile. I hear a sadness in someones voice and say they would be happy if only me. A wish unfulfilled.
Loneliness closes all around and a heavy mist disturbs my thoughts to make me happier; to no longer to bare innocent guilt and shame of a life that talks too loud to be quite.
Yet, there remains a special song to sing into the void that would have alluded me but just enough to keep away the purple dark; a song written by God that lingers and is keeper of a love that grows to hide my discontent.
This song, a lonely hunter of contentment, swells in my heart with every missed beat. My song welcomes each breath I take in the mornings and on into the night. The melody it makes is a drum rolls heard only in my hearing but too quite to fully understand.
David
I understand your fear. I use to have full blown panic attack as well. But you are quitting the job before you even get there. You are self fullfilling a prophesy. I use to do it all the time. I will tell you how I was able to help myself with anxiety. I still have it but I do not let it steal my goals from me anymore. Something that helped me tremendously is I would expose myself to crowds. I would go to concerts where there were thousands of people. At first the anxiety was just like yours. I would puke, my digestive would slow down, my palms would sweat and I thought everyone was against me. It was all in my head. I kept exposing myself to crowds, and I would feel the symptoms. I kept exposing myself over and over again until my anxiety cured itself a great deal. You can't cure nothing you keep running from. Go to a place where a huge crowd is. Keep going and you will see a difference. And remember to think about God Think about God and his mercy. I love you. God bless.
I would get right in the middle of the crowds too............
I'm due back to work tomorrow and I am dreading it, the same thing applies I think they will sack me for being off too long which makes me more anxious,
Lauren,
There seems to be a whole lot of religious stuff cropping up on these posts. Each to their OWN!
Do you take medication currently?
I can sympathise re the job situation totally I worked in a very confrontational environment and had panics and elevated heart rates a whole lot of time. It caused me considerable issues as I could not really take any meds. If your in a position to speak with you doctor I suggest that's the thing to do first. If you can take appropriate meds at work then you should consider it.
Also possible a support network where ever you are. I don't know if you in the U.S. or UK but there are councillors everywhere who maybe able to help. Also I found that a work based support/ friend network was helpful and encouraging to remain within the work place.
Thank you for your post! I actually was taking 150 mg Zoloft, 20 mg fluoxetine (beginning to switch off Zoloft) .5 mg Xanax for when i had panic attacks. The Zoloft made me become very isolated and paranoid, as if people were watching me constantly or judging. I was having suicidal thoughts so I stopped taking the Zoloft and started on fluoxetine. Well after a couple weeks of that I decided to just stop all medications. I felt like they were making things worse. I had some pretty bad mood swings when I switched but during this time my mother in law was dying, which was 3 weeks ago. She was on life support for a week and I missed my pschiatric apt so they kicked me out of the practice. Currently looking for a new one
Wow, Lauren I thought that post was one I had written. In the early days I would keep puking and nothing was in my stomach.
I'm in a new job also and the fear the first few weeks were exactly how you describe them.
Do the people know you have them? These days anxiety attacks are talked about without judgement.
Good luck in your new job