Hi guys,
As the title suggests my resolve is crumbling with what is going on. For 2 months now my thought processes have been severely skewed since a disastrous encounter with dp/DR. Ever since then every thought comes into question, every notion is a cause for concern, and even the gaps between every word, sentence and events are stressful for my mind. This has grown out of what began as an initial obsession with time. When it is really bad there is absolutely no relief, as if I try to do something like breathing exercises that is just another concept that exercises my mind further and it is like this all. Day. Long.
I'm completely detached from normal emotions now (as feeling emotion is also registered as a stressful concept) and needless to say this is not a deliberate over analysis but more like my awareness has been hijacked, not by an entity (I'm not psychotic) but by a malfunctioning part of my brain. My thoughts are fragmented and I can't hold onto a train of thought before it gets infested with this doubt and over analysis. My mind is always trying to cast itself past and future, and has this strange obsession with "will I remember this event normally or will this hurt too"
I haven't had a formal diagnosis, I haven't had any continuity of care. I used to be a very self assured, direct guy who was happy with his life, routine and pastimes. Now every waking moment is hell. I'm not sure what I'm looking for, but by the gods... I'm pretty desperate