Not sure if I'm in the right place... Stopped drinking 2 days ago :(

General health and lifestyle
1

I haven't had a drink Thursday or Friday and I feel like sh*te!  I drunk most days, though seldom spirits.  And most days I functioned perfectly fine. However, i am worried about what I could be doing to myself long-term and about my bank balance - i can't afford to drink daily!  

I've never seen a doctor about it.  Though I have had my mother make plenty of comments over the last 20 years.  And nicer friends.  Right now, I KNOW a couple of drinks (of wine or cider) would stop my head and back from aching.  Without going to the doctor, is there a way to tell if I've done/am doing damage or if I can still have a few drinks?  I can't picture a life void of alcohol

2

Well done you ! Hopefully tomorrow will be easier! As it leaves your system.

You sound a bit like me, I'm on day 1

GOOD LUCK

3

day 1... its a bigger deal than I would have thought! what are your reasons for stopping?  Before now I never really thought I had to, I never saw a problem and certainly didn't recognise that stopping may be difficult and that I'd need support!  

  having just reread my initial post, I sound like I don't want to stop - in truth, I kinda hope that I don't need to.  I don't drink nearly as much as some.  but at the same time, I know my relationship with drink isn't healthy. sigh!  Is there a middle ground where alcohol is sipped and put back in the fridge?

is it normal to feel so bad?  maybe I'm simply coming down with something?!?!   x

4

hi tracy  please take it from me,  you will be doing damage to your organs, i was a heavy drinker, i damaged my liver kidneys i also had bladder problems, you must go to a doctor for help, they will guide you through if you realy want to stop, it is not easy to try and do it alone, the only way to avoid damage is not to drink at all

    good luck 

5

tracy my reson for stopping was LIFE i nearly died, alcohol is very sneaky it creeps and a gets bigger hold of you, bit by bit without you realising it x  

6

my reasons for stopping is that once I start thats it until its gone! as you say the bank balance struggles too. I picked this weekend as my partner has taken the kids away ( a fun weekend) and I am scared of tackling this whilst their around! heading towards my second evening, I never consider drinking before 6pm and never touch spirits and do not want to speak to GP too ashamed

7

I am no medic but I am someone who has binged and stopped and started in differing lengths. You aint felt like this as your body has never been on empty. the alcohol stays in your body a long time so you've always supressed it - it will pass.  But do see your doctor and get some tests.

8

Hi Tracy,

I hope that things are going well.. never feel ashamed about your drinking, it is the worst possible thing that you can do, it is 'very easy to then start drinking in secret and the guilt compounds and causes even more problems..

The fact you like a drink does not make you a bad person in any way, go and see your doctor or your local communities alcohol service, they can offer help and advice in total confidence, also they are never in any way judgmental.... if you feel that you need help, you are entitled to it and as deserving as anybody else.

I had a very bad alcohol problem that almost ended my life!! I was sectioned four times into a secure mental health hospital. And I had many home detox treatment

With an alcoholic specialist nurse..

You are worth as much as anyone else and to ask for help shows courage..I am

Sorry to say that alcohol intake creeps up on you, but I am sure that if you get help

Now you will have a very healthy and happy future...

One final note, I am one of the very lucky? Ones, I can have a couple of drinks every

Now and then, albeit after ten years of abstinence.!!!

I truly wish you well and sincerely hope that you feel better health wise, and never

Forget.... you are worth as much as any other person so try to let go of the worry

And guilt.

You will be in my thoughts, Deirdre x

9

UR first clue admitting u" can't picture a life void of alcohol," says it all. Alcohol dependence is just what U said , that's the definnation of alcohol dependence. 

Take the first step listen to UR mom.. Get the help u need. And move on....just keep it movin addiction can take over UR life as it sounds like it has. Time for learing how YOU can take back control of UR life without addiction! biggrin

 

10

You said..." I don't drink nearly as much as some". Well add Yet !

11

Tracy, are you having physical withdrawal symptoms? By that, I mean, are you shaking, feeling nauseous or seriously anxious?

I don't know if you have had a drink today (Saturday) but if you have managed to get through a third day without a drink then you are probably over the worst. If not and you find that you ARE having physical withdrawal symptoms, you need medical help to stop drinking, don't try to stop drinking without (that is IF you are having shakiness etc)

You mention a couple of drinks, is that what you REALLY mean? Or do you mean a heavy session of drinking? How much have you been drinking per day?

12

Tracy made it thru the weekend ?  We r all pulling for you!

Most alcoholics in clinical studies show they begin to drink due to extreme anxiety (social, general, etc). Living & suffering through this many times. Coping with the pain & anxiety and the inability to even understand that Anxiety was the primary cause of pain that caused the drinking in the first place. The path to drinking then starts as a learned behavior that alcohol numbs the pain of anxiety.  Many use alcohol as self medication to treat anxiety & for many years. Learning to cope with anxiety before the addiction becomes a illness is key & may even save UR life. confused

13

I am ashamed Deride, and been hiding what I'm upto for ... wow ... well over 10 years.  

It did indeed start with social anxieties following a childhood illness & then PTS after a road accident.  I  was always well aware I drunk more than others, but it wasn't something I saw as a problem as I was able to stop when I'd had a good month or when I got pregnant - not cut down - stop.  Cutting down has been an issue for as long as I can remember.   

I'm afraid I drunk last night.  Again, not as much as some - a bottle of wine and a bottle of cider - one to two bottles of either is the norm for me, usually alone, but I have the control to keep most of it till the evenings.  I feel such a failure, im reaching out for help now as this time I see the problem, this time I am finding it hard to stop.  I really don't want to goto the doctor, im too embarrassed.  Is there an alternative?  Goodness, I couldn't even make it 3 days, pathetic!  Now I'm scared.  Of myself, my lack of will, and i admit, of what you guys will say.  Help, please.  

14

I didn't make it through, I feel even more worthless!  This is the 1st time I've ever tried to give up and I drunk on the 3rd day.   I kept myself so busy, working in the garden all day and i watched the clock as the shop shuts at 9pm (I don't keep alcohol in the house, but I ended up dashing there before closing. I don't think a drink enough to feel withdraw.  I had a constant head, stomach & 'bones' ache, but only trembled very slightly on and off - isn't trembling the biggie?  I assume, for me it isn't a physical addiction? The only thing aching right now is my head & my self-esteem.  I need help.  

15

tracy don't beat yourself up about it! today is another day! 

I did manage a second night not without a bad bad headache, I have been drinking full fat soft drinks to try to give my body the sugar that its missing from the alcohol also a glass to hold!, maybe an idea?

Good luck

16

Well done for your second day.  

I can't do this alone - now looking up local support meetings.  Also looking up how long I can expect to feel physically ill as that will give me a short term goal to aim for.  

Beyond the obvious, of not drinking alcohol, and keeping busy. What else can I do to focus, to distract myself etc?  Drinking sugary drinks may be a helpful - thanks.  

I don't believe in a higher power, do all support groups include prayer?  

17

Tracy, it sounds to me like you need an alcohol detox. That will get you a week under your belt which will be much more comfortable than trying to go cold turkey. All it involves is taking some medication which counteracts the withdrawal symptoms.

The fact that you have any physical symptoms at all suggests that you do have a physical dependence. Google 'sadq' and do the World Health Organisation's 'Severity of Alcohol Dependence Questionnaire' and see what score you get.

Don't feel worthless, you are no more worthless than a person trying to run a marathon with a broken leg. You have a medical problem which needs sorting.

18

Tracy, Dont worry about not making it through, the journey may be different for many of us and for  some relapse is part if it - believe me i should have a medal for the amount of times.  Someone gave me this:

On the basis of their own observations Prochaska and DiClemente believed that a person who changes as a result of receiving help, through counselling or therapy for example, goes through the same processes as a person who receives no help but has nevertheless has changed.

SIX STAGES INVOLVED IN CHANGE

PRECONTEMPLATION

CONTEMPLATION

DETERMINATION

ACTION

MAINTENANCE

RELAPSE

Just keep trying.

As for someone else's comment about giving up to a higher force - I to was dismissive about this and still am, but someone pointed out recently that even if you didn't get anything 'from' AA one of the things it does offer is that you are 'around sober people for a couple of hours'  t-his made a lot of sense to me, even though as a lone drinker rather than a social drinker - i.e. I drink at home alone it still makes sense i think dont know what others think.

19

Hi Tracy,

Please don't feel bad about yourself in any way xx. I took ten years to stop drinking, nobody can do it overnight.. if you can cut down slowly for a start off, say one unit every other day, and if possible one alcohol free day.. if you have days when you

Fail, just pick yourself up and start again..

I have to say that I found it easier to think, right. I can have a drink if I want to and

It helped to take the pressure off rather than thinking if I have a drink I have failed.

Believe me, I did not find it easy to stop, I was dragged kicking and screaming ( not

Really ) but I was sectioned four times, and even then I had very many slips along the way.

Even after giving up, I have been well for ten years, I still feel the need to have a

Bottle in the house so in some kind of way I still have a choice.. I used to feel the

Most unbelievable panic if I ran out..

Just try to never forget that you are in no way a bad person, you do not need to feel ASHAMED of your problem... try to talk to as many of your family, friends and

Support groups as you can..AA are very good ( even though I am a Catholic I found

It to be to intense for me ) you can ask your doctor for help, but I found the very

Best for me were the : community alcohol service : ,you can phone them or just call

In and ask to see someone, it is in complete confidence, my nurse became a very

Good friend to myself and my family.. they keep in touch with your own doctor, and

In my case my psychiatrist and mental health nurse.. you can see how many

Problems I had with alcoholic... I feel though after all those bad years I have come

Out the other end as a better person, stronger and much more laid back.

I truly wish you well , try not to worry too much, I am sure that you can do it, but

Don't worry if it takes very many tries.. you are in my thoughts and prayers

Good luck, let us know how you are doing.. xx Deirdre xx

20

Hi Tracy. I'm hoping my story will make you feel that you really are not alone! I have recently just done my first month in 15 years of drinking, possibly longer! I had an abusive partner who tried to destroy me,I suffer from depression, I've completely embarrassed myself in public, broken my ribs drunk, fallen down stairs, hurt my family, nearly lost my husband and children!. I tried AA and other  recovery programmes, ect. Then I stopped going out at all, just drank in the evenings when the kids were in bed. My husband always works late so I became dependant on alcohol, my wind down and my only thing I looked forward too.

I started to get all sorts of health problems but was in total denial that the vodka was hurting me! I had test after test and because my liver funtion test came back ok I carried on. Recently a few weeks ago, my bloating had become embarrassing, I'd been asked if I was pregnant! And my liver was hurting, I had an ultrasound and they set the alarm bells ringing for me!. They said my liver was fatty and swollen, it had noduals on it which he said could be Cancer.

I came away from the hospital with more wracked guilt than I normally felt daily, and the sick feeling that I might be too late to see my children grow up. I was so in denial that all that mattered was getting pissed! I never in a million years could imaging an evening or going out without a drink!!! But I knew I had to, this was my turning point. I didn't shake but I sweated it out a couple nights and it was bloody hard, but I did it. I was as moody as hell and horrible to be around, I slept in the spare room for 3 weeks, couldn't go near my husband! I had to wait 4 weeks for my liver results but stopping drink, all my symptoms disappeared!!!. My scan showed alcohol damage and my liver is still swollen. I still have to have a MRI to be sure but it looks like I stopped in time! We are now on holiday and I have had some sangrea, but sprits are a no no. I never thought I would say it, but the theripst  said to me. Don't let your mind control your body, let your body control your mind. Your mind tells you you need a drink, your body tells you it's hurting you! Every time I want a drink I think of a shrivelled up liver, which takes a good 6 months to repair and some days it still hurts. Message me when ever you like, even if a private message, if I can do it, I know you can. xx