3 days ago we put our beloved cat down. He was 15 1/2 but started sleeping a lot and had been drinking water from our glasses beside the bed. He stopped eating one day and so we took him to the vet with the news it was pretty bad kidney disease. I feel so bad because i should have taken him to the vet months ago for a check up..but he seemed happy until the last few weeks he was very whingy. I am so guilt ridden because i would get angry at him for meowing so much. The poor little man was just trying to tell us something wasn't right! We got him an anti nausea injection and the vet recommended to put him down the next day. My partner didn't want to put him on IV fluids in a hospital because he didn't want that stress for him. We slept with him in the lounge room that night and gave him as much love as possible. we put him down the next day. The poor little thing was so confused and limp. I keep thinking that we could have saved him! It was too quick and we didn't even try to help him. it could have helped!? I am suffering so much sadness and guilt. I want my beautiful cat back and its too late....I can't stop crying
Hello,
I'm really sad to hear that the cat you love so much has had to be put to sleep. You mustn't blame yourselves though. I work for Cats Protection and am coordinator one of their branches in the south of england. I also have kidney disease Stage 4. I can tell you that kidney disease cannot be cured in cats only sometimes delayed if cats are given medication from a young age and older cats are particularly vulnerable. Sadly there is not a great deal that could have been done. Your cat has lived very much longer than average. 151/2 is a very good age for a cat. He has also received a lot of love and had a very happy life with you. I wish that more cats got this. Remember all the happy moments and don't blame yourselves for what is a natural process of ageing.
Thank you so much Lyn, your words are a comfort to me. I am so sorry that you have kidney disease yourself and will send you some loving energy from Australia to get through the hardship of this disease.
Thank you. Thank you.
Hi Kate,
I don't think you should be blaming yourself, but try to think of the 151/2 good years that you had together. KIdney failure is a common end for an old cat I'm afraid. It is best when their quality of life has gone not to put them through complicated procedures. I think you did what was best and it is not wrong to grieve for a much loved animal. The worst days of my life have been when one of my dogs has had to be 'put to sleep'! I feel for you!
KenR
Thank you Ken, It just happend so quickly. To say goodbye. I am now feeling like I will enjoy the memories and try not to blame myself. Thank you for responding and your kind words. It helps.
I was so staggered by the insensitivity of your post that I had to read it a number of times before I could believe you were seriously talking about a cat with kidney disease on a patient discussion group which is used by people with end stage kidney failure whose lives have been devastated by it. I thought it was a bad joke at first!
I think that's a little harsh. We are all creatures on this earth. Who is to judge whom we love or grieve for when they die?
Hi Susannah,
I am truly sorry to have posted this in this section. I actually googled grief about euthanasia with cat forum and this forum came up. Someone posted about thier cat on this site and I now realise it was in the depression section. I really wasn't thinking clearly through my grief. This month i have also lost a baby at 9 weeks. I am 40 and might not be able to concieve. 10 mins before I went in for a proceedure to remove the dead fetus, i fould out that my cat needed to be put down. My partner also suffers BPD (borderline personality disorder) and has been suicidal many times. Our cat was a source of great comfort, his purring would calm my partner down in the most desperate of times. It is such a journey and our cat was the most calm and constant thing in our lives. I myself have thought there is something terribly wrong with me to be so overwhelmed and desperate about the death of our cat. I should have posted this in the depression section. I don't mean to negate your pain and suffering. I am so sorry.
Thank you Lyn
Hi Kate,
This forum is populated by many understanding members who are well able to sympathise with multiple problems. It was easy to recognise that the post might have been placed elsewhere. If one cannot make a helpful suggestion then it is best to keep quiet, not knowing the full circumstances! There is no shortage of helpful and understanding people on this forum!
Hi Ken,
Your understanding and sympathy have been so helpful to me. I have never used a forum before, and the kind words that have come from stranges have helped my grief. Immensly. Just to be heard.
Thank you
Hi Kate,
I think we all owe help to others and there is no doubt that we all benefit from giving it. So dont take awkward comment to heart - understanding is the important thing!
Thank you Ken
Hello,
So sorry to hear about the loss of your little kitty, as an animal lover myself I know we have them in our lives so long they become like family members and this is how it should be. I would be worried if you were not upset. I was also saddened to read that you had lost your precious baby, as a parent myself this would be heartbreaking. You are also supporting a loved one with mental health issues so I would say you are a pretty strong lady wouldn't you agree if you have a think about it. I have gone through all of the stages of kidney failure and dialsysi and also transplant so kidney disease and you don't usually feel pain unless there are other issues so for your comfort just think kitty wasn't in pain. I don't think the site actually specifies you have to post about people, I may be wrong but do you know what you are going through a really difficult time and you are reaching out for a bit of human compasion and support so if you get that on here I am glad you posted and I wish you all the best for the future xx
Hi Helen,
Thank you so much for your kind words and understanding. It is incredible that people on this forum have given their compassion towards me when they themselves are or have suffered so much themselves. It is that beautiful feeling/energy from others that helps so much and is so valuable in the world. Just like Ken said.
I would like to donate to a kidney foundation/research as something i can give back. Can you ...or others let me know which is a good organisation to do this.
Again Thank you.
Hi,
If you google them there are a couple, if I put it on here they may get deleted by the moderators as there are certain things you cannot post, I know some links are deleted. I did a walk when I was on dialysis and raised money for walking with the wounded which helps ex servicemen and women. I did this as my husband is ex forces and I know how in they are. You see you can give to any charity to bring value, I want to walk up snowden for air ambulance when my leg will let me. Neither of the above mentioned have any government funding you see and I think my firend did a kind thing for me with no benefit for her (I had one of her kidneys) I was helped so I want to help others and it doesn't need to be people like me just those who are in need like I was. My walk was fun it took ages and I did it with a friend who has various heath issues but we did it (Slept for 2 days after but we tried and acheived what we set out to do) Never lose hope either for the things you want most in your life. x
Dear Kate,
You poor dear! You ave been through such a lot lately. I do hope things improve for you. I had a similar loss of a child when I was 40. It had taken a long time to get pregnant and I thought I might not be able to conceive again. However, I had a lovely daughter. She is 33 now and has her own children. I hope this can happen for you.
There is quite a lot of research om the effects on health of having a cat as companion. Stroking cats can lower your blood pressure and make people feel less stressed. Maybe one day you will be able to give an unwanted cat a loving home. There are many people on this forum and the support many offer is compassionate and helpful. I hope you find the strength to deal with all that has happened to you.
Thanks Helen,
Thats wonderful that you give to to those other charities. It sounds amazing what you have done and will do. My 76 year old mother voluteers her time in a womens refuge, and she and the women she helps benefit greatly. Although the many sad stories it is worthwhile in its entirety. I will never lose hope Helen and strive to help others along the way. Thank you x
Dear Lyn,
Yes, I guess I have been through a bit lately. After Susannah posted I wrote the words to try and explain to her about my mistake and situation. And that helped me. I realised that I had been going through so much and have had to be strong for so long. I have had to always hold the fort. I thought I was so strong. Until this. I didn't realise how much love and energy the cat gave me and I gave to him.
Thank you for sharing that you had a similar experience with the loss of a child. I am so glad that you have a family around you now.
Maybe one day I will give an unwanted cat a loving home.
Through this forum, I have been able to start healing.
Thank you Thank you
Kate, my dog was diagnosed with kidney disease one month before we had to end his suffering. It showed up in his annual physical bloodwork. I almost wish that he hadn't been diagnosed because the treatment the vet suggested was to change his diet to one for dogs with kidney disease. Until that change in diet, he had been eating fine and we didn't think that he was acting sick - just old. Once he was getting "treatment", he wouldn't eat and he started losing weight which is the worse for progression of the disease in dogs. It was painful to watch him try to eat - he was starving, but couldn't bring himself to eat much, even when we changed his diet back and offerred him all sorts of foods that he had liked before. I can't help but think that if we had never changed his diet to one that is better for kidney disease, he would have been able to eat for awhile longer and he would have lasted more than one month. So, please don't be hard on yourself for not taking your beloved cat to the vet sooner. It could have been worse for him. Take care of yourself and I hope that you are feeling better soon.