I've found myself completely overwhelmed at times. I've given up alcohol and cigarettes in October. This led me to try and deal with anxiety with no crutch. I stopped anti depressants in January. I left a toxic relationship and our home in March. I exercise more regularly and do things I enjoy more.
But I get myself in an awful state thinking about the future. I'm 32, newly single, I don't own my own home, but I do have a car... Although the car looks on the blink and it mightn't drive tomorrow. I work full time. I'm not living in the best place- with a friend who still drinks- makes it a challenge for me to avoid it.
I'm now faced with many options do I move abroad? I have to rent my own place right now. I have to save money for this. I need money for a new car. What about future men now I don't drink. A whole pile of nonsense over and over. I'm not rich things will take time to save.
I'm so used to wanting the instant gratification, it kills me to be patient. At the same time I'm trying to heal. My own place would provide this- but I don't have the money yet.
Thinking about everything makes my brain want to explode. Which makes me want to drink and often think suicidal thoughts. I'm so worn out. I need to calm the heck down. But it all seems so much.
Hi Starsabove
We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologies for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.
If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.
Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here: https://patient.info/health/dealing-with-suicidal-thoughts, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.
If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.
Kindest regards
Patient
Think about your recovery. That's a lot of chemicals messing with you brain. Alcohol, cigarettes, AD's. Some say withdrawal symptoms can last up to a year after AD's. Maybe you are experiencing this.
If you can abstain from drinking that's great and you should be proud of it. it will help you massively in the long run. I don't drink much but ive noticed when I do, it makes my anxiety a lot worse. Ive had bouts of very severe anxiety since july last year. I also recently stopped anti depressants and it is HARD but I feel its the right move.
Set a short term plan and stop looking to far into the future. keep us posted.