Hi ladies
I find the more I focus on my symptoms the worse I get. I've stopped focusing on every single symptom I have I've stopped wallowing in self pity and this has made a huge difference in my life so I thought I would just share it to see if this motto will help others as it can't be healthy with the constant moaning and talking about peri or meno every day it will only impact is if we allow it to
Oh God how is that possible I can't help not focusing on the dizziness cause it just doesn't stop everyday it's tiring
Hi Nicola ,
I am trying to do the same. I find this site useful for facts and reassurance. I am newly diagnosed ,despite having had it for a while and I am trying to move on from the feelings attached to the initial stage of diagnosis. This won’t last forever ( am sure!) and I don’t want to give it any more power than it already has as I’ve been gruesome with it! Good luck with everything! X
I absolutely agree! However, when you first get into it, you really just want to get an understanding as to what’s happening to your body. I have just found some medical articles connecting anesthesia and hormonal changes. Two months ago I had a surgery, and I have not been the same person since In my mind I always connected my body changing and that surgery which made no sense to me. However, I do wonder if they are connected. And just understanding that connection and understanding that I haven’t gone crazy has helped me to start to move forward. I vow to have a positive mindset. But you truly do have to be an advocate for your own health as I had a doctor who was staring me in the completely wrong direction.
It is the worst and I mean worst ..Like i have to hold on for dear life when it happens. And then immediately the hot flash. You know it is from the hormones spiking or dropping. I have tried everything I can to stop them without meds...I heard black cohosh helps
Hi Nicola, cheers to you! Unfortunately, Easier said than done for most of us. Positivity is my middle name, however, hard to be positive when you feel physically and mentally bankrupt! Also, a lot of us have family members, friends and doctors who are sick of listening to us. I wish I could cover my eyes and all my crap would go away. I enjoy swapping stories with the ladies on this forum. They do not bring me down. This topic does not get enough attention, I am glad we are so poignant and honest. Take good care!
Hi nicola...yes agree....it can so becomr you and therr comrs a point where you just have to get on with it.....well most the time but i do have still some bad moments that set me back....thank you for this. CK
Well that’s easier said than done ... when you’re exhausted all the time can’t get out of bed depression fatigue ... it’s a whole different ballgame .
If it’s just a few hot flashes and irritability then definitely can handle that and ignore it but when your whole life stops and is affected by this ..... not so easy to overcome
This works for me on my better days. But on my bad days it takes all I can do to just get thru. When the anxiety, depression, off balance feeling, and spaced out feeling sink in then it's so hard not to focus on them...as they whack up my perception to life in general. By pure principle, lots of grin and bear it, and a heavy dose of heaven's help I am able to get thru the bad days. This stuff is crazy hard!
Yes having one of those days today 😩 not that my other days are great but it’s a tough one today. Lovely sunny afternoon and all I can think about is let the hours roll by so that I can go to bed ... no way to live ! I’ve missed most of Spring and ALL of the summer !
Hi Nicola.
Im curious what symptoms you've had? I'm doing pretty good most days now, but a year ago I was debilitated with anxiety, fatigue, globes sensation and fear among other symptoms. There was no way just holding onto a motto of not 'wallowing in self pity' would have made a difference at that time. Also, when this first started happening to me, I was not wallowing in anything! I was seriously thinking something was wrong with me and I was very ill and needed some medical diagnosis to save me from whatever it was that had me feeling so bad. I'm so grateful for this forum. It has helped me in so many ways. It's great to come here for support and chat with other women who are in the same situation. And sometimes - wallowing in self pity! Nothing wrong with the occasional break down and feeling sorry for yourself. This peri/ meno stuff sucks hards and while I think being positive is a great thing and something I practice... it is much much easier when you're not feeling like total crap! Everyone on this board will get to the point of feeling better and be better able to handle things. Until then, thinking about it everyday and moaning about it and feeling self pity at times is part of it. Bad peri/ meno symptoms are not affecting us because we allow them to or because we are thinking about them too much everyday... they impact us because our bodies are in a state of shift. I wish I had been able to control my symptoms last year just by brushing them aside and not giving them notice. That would have been a physical and mental impossibility at that time. As soon as I started feeling better, I was able to think in a more positive way. I hope your symptoms have not been as brutal as many of the women on this board. It's a tough time for sure!
I don't know what you have been through or what symptoms you have suffered but for myself it has been the toughest struggle of my life. When I was at my worst my body and mind were so out of wack I was barely able to function. I fell into a very deep and very scary depression that no amount of positive thinking would bring me out of. I was very fortunate to have been told about a doctor who specialises in woman's hormones so made an appointment and have been under his care and guidance for the past 20 months. I'm a lot better now but still a work in progress. This was never something I wallowed in at any time. It has been something I have had to deal with one moment at a time even when I had thoughts that maybe it was all too much and questioned whether or not I wanted to go on. I hope I haven't come across as abrupt but I'm very passionate about the mental health and emotional side of peri menopause. It's something that is so misunderstood even amongst some women as to how debilitating it can be.
For those of us who suffer it isn't just a bad day. It's much much much more than that.
I agree so much! I’ve made numerous changes in my 50’s that I wish I had made in my 40’s. Aging is a fact of life just like menopause. The only way to avoid the transition is death and I’m glad I’ve been fortunate to make it this far. It beats the alternative. If it can go wrong in the last few years, it has so I’ve fought depression. too. I also have hypothyroidism. I’m not privileged and have few breaks but attitude is everything. I have plenty to get me down. I changed my diet two years ago because food allergies were controlling me and making me miserable and it made me feel better as I was in less digestive and migraine pain. Physical therapy working on poor posture causing extreme neck pain has helped even more. I can’t lay on the couch like my mom and become a recluse. I’ve researched for years for cures as no docs were helping!! I’m fighting to get better one day at a time. Nobody will help me like I can help myself. The gym is next!! Positive vibes ladies!! Yup, aging sucks but I will go down fighting trying to find my best life!! 😘
Omg that’s soooo true Audra and so well said ! We’re not just moaning for the good of our health it’s because we’re debilitated !
I too have been this way for 5 months fatigue like I’ve never known it ! Depression like I’ve never experienced !
I’m no pity party person either but when this is with you 24/7 you cannot help it . We are crying out for help but there is no help !
I’ve tried patches make me depressed the cream hasn’t done anything so now I’m stuck with a fatigue that literally engulfs you ... it’s like even after 10 hours sleep you’ve been up for days. All I can say is God help us all this is a travesty !
Audra -I was reading what you went through last year and can place a check next to all of your symptoms and the one I didn't have a name for; globus sensation! I had all of that...anxiety, fear, depression, about 10 symptoms on the list non-stop AND that weird feeing in my throat - woke up in June after a heavy period and my hormones crashed.
This forum was the greatest gift to me. I thank the Lord for leading me here to a place of wisdom, comfort and encouragement. It's a place to share our experiences and concerns when so many around us don't understand.
Right there with ya! Boy the depression and fatigue is unbearable . I CAN handle hot flashes sweating irritability brittle hair but when you cannot function it’s very scary .
I too had moments whereby I thought there is no end or relief with this .. should I still keep trying should I live this horrible existence . No woman or human should have to get used to feeling this way ...,EVER !
When you are physically exhausted all day and night and your mind is negative and confused it can be very dangerous .
Well that all sounds very positive but I’m your mom ... lie around most of the day as I’m physically unable to move . So my thoughts are with her and the pain she went through .
I eat healthy workout take my vitamins but nothing makes it better .
So sorry Lori. I'm telling you what I need to hear on my bad days and that is...you will have another good day! So far our track record for surviving the bad days is 100%. But man alive are the bad days hard. Hugs to you!!
The globus sensation was terrifying for me! I had my husband look up how to do a tracheotomy in case I started suffocating! I had no idea what it was that was causing the feeling and the dr just brushed it off like it wasn't a big deal! I had 2 nasolaryngoscopies and was begging for an endoscopy trying to figure out what was causing it! An ENT told me it was caused by silent reflux and gave me mega doses of PPI and H2 blockers. Well, since I didn't actually have reflux issues the meds made me so sick and really jacked up my stomach for a couple months. I went to a gastro Dr after I started the reflux meds and he was like... get off those things! You don't need them! I still get the globus feeling- some days are worse than others but I've learned to live with it since I know I'm not going to suffocate from it! I hope yours is either gone or not too bad. It's a rough symptom to deal with!
Yes, the fatigue is so hard! I recall when I was younger and was tired, I'd just battle down and plow through it. Easy enough! With this peri fatigue there is no fighting through it! It's crazy how completely drained and heavy feeling it can make you! I know it will leave and we'll be back to normal. There are so many older ladies bopping around all chipper and energetic! One day we will look back and recall how tired we were and be ever thankful that phase of our lives is over!! Maybe this is the universes way of helping me accept getting older? I'm actually looking forward to being that old, grey haired, spiffy grandmother! 😉