Hello! I do not really know how to categorize this so I am sorry if I tagged this post incorrectly. I don’t think I have an anxiety disorder, though?
Anyway, I have someone I’m afraid of. I believe that this fear of them started because I have witnessed the said person be verbally abusive towards someone I am fond of (not in a romantic way since the abused someone is blood-related) for a decade and more. This person is also related to me by blood (but I apologize that I won’t state the specific relation). I am very, very uncomfortable around them although I can see them and can interact with them in a civil manner. But when they raise their voice or if I feel like they are going to start an argument (no matter who they argue with, not necessarily me), I immediately feel so afraid that I start crying. I sob uncontrollably and that can go on from minutes to hours. I often have difficulty in breathing because of sobbing so hard. This certain “event/experience” also only happens with the said person because I am often someone who are strong enough to not cry if I hear others yell or have their arguments.
This started years ago. This person is also one of the major influence of my immense sadness (I don’t think it’s depression, though, but I’m not entirely sure. I just don’t want to label because I am not diagnosed with any disorder at the moment) and suicidal thoughts.
My question is: is that “event/experience” something that needs to be labeled (like is it an anxiety attack?)? or am I just overthinking this?
I hope you can take your time to respond to this question of mine. Your answers will mean so much to me. Thank you so much in advance!