Hi everyone, i wonder if i could get a bit of advice? everyone i know think i have the perfect life. I have a really well paid senior managers job, a great wife and two beautiful boys.
My major issue is that i think i may be an alcoholic. i can stay of it for a week or two but then i feel the pressure of work coming on and wham, i'm straight back on it. I'll drink for days on end, mainly on my own! miss work and then lie about why i wasnt in. im lieing to everyone including my wife and im not fit enough mentally forv my current position. I've constantly got the fear and feel suicidal often. I want to leave my job but feel that could be the last straw and i'll never get myself sorted. maybe i should go sick and let my employer know exactly whats going on? any advice would be good as i'm really struggling.
Hi I lied to my employer for years and for me it was the worst thing . My drinking spiralled out of control. Towards the end ( where my drinking was at its worst ) I finally told the nurse in our OHS department at work....... for me it was one of the best things I have ever done . They put me into a twenty program in a rehab hospital. It was the help I finally needed and wanted. I thought I had kept my drinking secret and no one knew.... but in reality everyone knew . I still have my job and my relationship with family and friends have much improved. No more lies and feelings. For me opening up and being honest was the best thing I have ever done ✅ hope my story has helped and wish you lots of luck in your decision.
thanks leslie and paul i'm goi ng to speak with my employer and gp regarding taking a few weeks off and possibly starting a programme. advice much appreciated.
Your drinking style sounds like the "binge" style, wherein one might take days or weeks off from drinking, then drink for days on end. The Sinclair Method that Paul mentioned can be very good for this. I had a daily drinking addiction for over 30 years that I gradually wound down using The Sinclair Method. It took me about 5 months and in the end I just didn't care about alcohol anymore. Month by month, I drank less and less as I felt like stopping sooner and eventually not drinking at all on some days. That expanded to not drinking at all on most days and only having a couple on days that I did drink. Booze ceased to "speak" to me as it did in the past and I've largely lost interest in it. Now, it takes me a month or more to drink what I used to drink in only one night.
Good luck with your employer 👍🏻 It's the best thing I did was hard but worth it 😀
Hi Jimmy,you have one life.Both my late parents died many years ago.They were both Alcoholic S! I was sent away to a boarding school& never had a family life or love or support,& now suffer from chronic Anxiety,due to my late parents.Next weekend I am celebrating my 60 th but I am not going to drink as it will give me an awful headache,& I would rather sit down after people have gone home & might have a small Bailey's.You only have one liver.It sounds as though you need to take time out of your job & seek help,before it's too late.Good luck regards Amanda
Hi Jimmy... you have really already taken a huge step today by asking for help.You really need to get some time away from.your work responsibilites, and face yourself .See your GP and say what you have told us here...there is help for you out there and support from communities like this.
Your GP may refer you to local alcohol services ..There is AA which although isn't for everyone, an understanding ear is always there .. where you have been there is always someone else with a similar story There will be a meeting somewhere near you.I don't personally use AA these days but found them a deep source of help in.my darkest times.Many of us have lied to the people close to us .... finding all sorts of excuses for those hangover days and not turning in work or worse still going into work when you know you aren't fit for the job ..you are not alone Jimmy but I know what a lonely place it feels .. .You really do need some time to sort yourself believe me it really can get better Natalie
SeE GAGE test . A questions under useful resources by emis moderator. The second post box on the alcohol site.
Also has a lot if other helpful resources listed that has been available & discussed for many years and helped many here with AUD.
This also gives you an opportunity to find more information and help with any questions you may have concerning AUD & the many meds to quiet the cravings and TREATMENTS AVAILABLE ,
HOPE4CURE 🎄
Hi All, thanks for your comments. not been drinking now since Friday morning. been rattling about full of anxiety for two days now. i'm pretty lucky as my wife is so with me and supportive. i really appreciate all your comments as i was feeling im in this myself, i really want to stop drinking and think the Sinclair method would be best for my situation. Would my GP know about this method or would it be a specialist that id need to speak to?
How Jimmy ... Well done ! Thats good news Am so glad ypu have the support and understanding at home .I have just this week started TSM .. I did mine through an Online doc initially as thought i'd try the Selinco and see how I got on before song my gp..It's expensive to buy tho so my time like that is limited ...Took first tablet Fri and now on day 3 .Had a couple of drinks every night and had no urge to drink more ..Also side effects from the medication have been minimal for me... I feel great too and got so.easy control back so I know its really helping me ..I would be interested to know what your GP says about it ...Take it easy and Good Luck
Try your GP Jimmy. Unfortunately many won't prescribe Naltrexone or Nalmefene, but it has to be your first port of call because some are willing to. They are unlikely to know it as The Sinclair Method though. I would recommend asking for Naltrexone and maybe tell the doctor what you have read. Maybe even print off a brief summary of the method to take with you (nothing too long or it is likely to be ignored.) If you can't get Naltrexone, the GP may be willing to prescribe Nalmefene but the side effects of that can be more difficult, so try for Naltrexone first.
will do Paul and ty natalie
Hi Jimmy,
Part of the support I offer is to look up the local NHS guidelines for your area. This will tell you who your local NHS has deemed to be the best person or organisation to prescribe these medications.
If you wish to, please feel free to PM me the town and county where you live and I will be able to look up any guidelines specific to the area you live.
Joanna.
Hi, I tried talking to my doc about TSM - she was totally dismissive of it and said she had never heard of it - told me not to go there as she did not like the sound of it.
When I came clean with her about my problem this year she referred me to Smart Recovery and I asked her if she drank alcohol - and if so what would life be like, to her, if she was told she could not drink anymore; her reply was that life would be very boring and she cannot imagine it - well that empowered me a little - I felt like I was interviewing her lol. But yet again I went to see her on Friday for another issue unrelated to drinking and she was off sick - AGAIN - which makes me think that me talking to her about TSM got to her - like the saying goes The Lady Doth Protest Too Much.
What I am saying is that if your doc does poo poo TSM, don't feel defeated, not with this site, there is no need. I would gladly dump my doc for these guys.
First start is being honest, and you have, like all of us - blooming hard to do. Now you stay on here no matter what your doc says (although you may be lucky and have one that is literate with TSM) then it is onwards and upwards with our family - we will get you through.
Very best to you
G.
Hi
I'm having problems with my GP too. I have been on Antabuse for years ( hadn't heard of others medications until I came on this site ) . I have other problems too but my doctor will not prescribe me anything other than Antabuse!!!!! Not happy but I'm not drinking im sober and healthy BUT the urge to drink is still there
Bypass your doctor and self refer yourself to your local alcohol recovery service. Nearly all accept self referals. Attend the initial information gathering appointment, and the request an appointent to see the prescribing physician there. Discuss the treatments with him/her. In the UK, the NHS has approved antabuse, acamprosate, natrexone and nalmefene for prescribing in the treatment of Alcohol Use Disorder. Under the NHS Constitution, you have a LEGAL right to be assessed for any approved medications to see if they are suitable for you.
By not referring you on, or assessing you himself/herself, your doctor is violating your legal right as written in the NHS Constitution.
Just because your GP doesn't feel comfortable prescribing anything other than antabuse doesn't mean you should be an addiction specialist.
You wouldn't expect your GP to prescribe you a course of treatment for cancer BUT you would expect your GP to refer you to the consultant who specialises in cancer, wouldn't you?
Sorry, typo. That should read....
Just because your GP doesn't feel comfortable prescribing anything other than antabuse doesn't mean that you should not be referred to an addiction specialist.
This annoys me so much. That doctors feel qualified to tell you that treatments they know nothing about are no good. Yet they are happy to refer you to services which have less than 10% success rate and are not based on ANY science.
What I really fail to understand is why, with it being so easy to look stuff up in these days of the Internet, that professional clinicians do not go away and read about these things. We are now living in times in which many patients are far more knowledgable about their condition than their doctor. This means that the days of doctors dictating should be in the past and medical treatment, where possible, should be a partnership between the patient and their doctor.
I would be ashamed, as an alcohol treatment specialist, if there was a method of treatment which was proven to be effective and I hadn't heard of it. Like when I first heard about TSM, I read about it and thought about it and, although I initially thought it might be rubbish, I looked into it enough to see that it made medical sense, then started using it with my patients. It's common sense! If something may work better than what has done before, it should be considered.
Yep u got it. And in that situation also I would be ashamed,