Please tell me it's normal?

Treatment and medication
1

Hi I have been on 20mg citalopram for 3 weeks now the last few days my anxiety and fear have been lingering I suffer from obsessive thoughts that sicken me and they were bad last night I was quite anxious! My hubby was on a night out and I think that made me feel feared I hate being alone even tho my three babies were in the house! I was feeling better by week 2 now week 3 seems awful is this just early days?? 

Thanks in advance

Emz x

2

Yes ..don't be so hard on yourself..we all have bad days and bad thoughts !?. You Are not alone

3

.....I think it's called being Normal ..LOL

4

Thanks so much for your message I am so hard on myself!! Thanks for the reassurance! 

Emz x

5

Emz, the same thing happened to me two weeks in. My wife was having a girls night out and I was home with my kids. I was an emotional wreck for awhile, but I took a 0.25 Xanax and it calmed me down a lot. I think doctors are being irresponsible by not prescribing a benzo with the SSRI. Almost every one has increased anxiety the first two weeks and the benzo's are so helpful with the start-up effects. 

I think what happened to you is perfectly normal. Probably some of the side effects from the pill and some of the anxiety you are taking them for. It will get better.  Do a search for the learning path on the clinical-depression uk website. There is some great information out there. 

6

Thanks mark my gp prescribed propranolol and it worked well I didn't  have physical symptoms from the fear! It's awful I know and my husband is so good! Thanks so much for the message! Really appreciate it! So it's defo my depression and possibly still the pills grr!! I don't think I could take benzos I work in health sector and can not take time off as I'm on placement for a post grad! 

Thanks again

Emz x

7

Hey lovely lady

One minute, hor and day at a time if you can reach that. I take Cirtralopam too for anxiety...started it last year and yes worse to begin with. I have other health needs so take Propananol too and it does help.Maybe if hubbie out next time put pillows in the bed when he lays may give you security of someone beign there or else  share with the babies xxx

8

Thanks lyn!! Yeah I'd thought I might get them in beside me!! Thanks for the advice just glad it's normal suppose hard after I felt bit brighter for a while grr!! 

Xx

9

Hi Emz

Gosh I so wish doctors would prepare their patients for this journey instead of just dishing out pills with a follow up in 2 weeks.  It's those 2 weeks that you need support and reassurance.

I feel for you, as we've all been through what you're experiencing right now.

Citralopram and all SSRI's produce unpleasant and scary side effects which make you feel as though they aren't working.  You'll find you'll go up and down over many weeks and experience side effects on and off.  This will all pass, but it takes quite a few weeks, and reckon by week 4-5 things will start to ease.  This also happens with each dose increase too.  Obsessive thoughts are often a symptom of anxiety and can be heightened too at this time, but once the anxiety starts to ease, the thoughts become less scary, lost their importance and fade into the background.

In my experience it's about 3 months when you feel the benefits, though some people feel these earlier.  Everyone's different.

Hang on in there ..... you're doing well, and it'll all smooth out in the end.  Recovery is a slow process.  Lots of patience is the answer.

K xx

10

Thank you so much Kate! Such reassuring are your messages! I know my gp is poor and I had to make an apt myself for next week just to chat! I'm for counselling this week il need it!! Thanks so much Kate and I do hope this horrible depression and anxiety lifts at least for Christmas!! 

Thanks again

Emz xx

😘

11

I think GP's should start taking being directed to this website lol.  This medicine is great, but we all seem to have to go through hell first.  Many people sadly give up too soon because they can't cope with the side effects.  I used to have really bad anxiety, depression and obsessive thoughts for years and never thought I'd get out of the dark hole.  I started Citralopram and recovered!  Been well for years now.

Don't expect to be well for Christmas ...... I really hope you are though.  Just let recovery come to you.  If you expect it and aren't well by Xmas, you may feel quite low.  Just accept how you feel at the moment, remember you're body is working towards recover, and it'll come in time.  Remember patience.

Fingers crossed for Xmas though xxx 

12

Hi five to that GPs reading this site!! I have friends who are drs and I said to them about my side effects at the start and was given all sorts of s*it!! But sure! Thanks Kate oh I know I really am taking each day as it comes sometimes trailing myself to do things! I really appreciate your kind support and so glad your out of the clutches of depression! Well done! 

Thanks again! 

Emz x

13

It's something nobody has any inkling what's it's truly like, unless you've suffered yourself ...... even doctors and professional medicals in this field.  Yes they're trained and know best ... but the experience is something you can't explain unless you've been there.

Good luck xx

14

Totally agree!! There's empathy and sympathy!! Thanks Kate! Nightmare getting thru to my GP, the support here is great thanks again.

Emz xx

15

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Emz3279

Yes, it always makes me wonder with SSRI's, the side effects are huge and a main one is deppression, anxiety and insomnia.  I've been on every one maginable and never really felt they worked or made me feel bad in the begining then just felt - ugg.  I feel for you, I do agree with Mark on the point of a benzo just to begin with not too long so no dependance, you would no all that.  I'm sure it will def pass and good luck Merry Xmas too you Darl.

Nicola x

17

Thanks Nicola for your message and hope your keeping well! Merry Xmas to you! I suppose it's part n parcel of the recovery I did ask my gp about sleeping tablet mainly for when I'm on night duty as I take my meds in the morning and don't want to confuse my body but he kinda dodged that and said wait and see how I go! Iv been feeling better good and bad days but defo glad I started medication! Thanks Hun 

Emz xx

18

Kate,

I so agree, sometimes they even look at you with no empathy or sympathy, you get that look of being look down upon, at least I was when a doctor had put me on a benzo and gave me repeats.  I was so down and he told me nothing about the effects and dependantcy on these meds.  It made me feel better, I could go out again, felt so much better. I now no to research anything a doc wants to put me on but I have had years of hell getting off these things and have been put on This celex everyone is talking about and my doc mentioned nothing about perhaps feeling worse before better and im still coming down off benzo's. 

Medical profession go by the book and what you SHOULD feel like but until you have had  a taste of any of this people can not understand and yes there is no way you can explain.  I feel like I was i HEll,  I actually feel Hell wont be as bad.  Good luck to all, try to stay strong so we can beat this issue.  We unfortunatly are the guinea pigs for the Medical profession now they no what these drugs to people some professionls wipe there hands of us or cut us off.  I also must say it's taken a long time but have finally found a professional that trully understands but i had to go to a Phyciatrist to find that understanding and HELP.  Please everyone try to have a great christmas or at least a peacefull one.  My thoughts are with you all.

Kind regards  Nicola x

19

Gives us all hope Kate.  Thank you.  You get more help on this site than at he doctors.

 

20

Hi Nicola

I think most of us have had the effects of no sympathy from doctors ....... one wrong word from them can send us crashing down.  A few times I've come from the doctors surgery, got in my car then burst into tears, and other times times I've left with my heart singing - all due to what's been said to me.

I had a wonderful doctor who helped me through many years, and it really frightened me when he left.  Sure enough the first one I see was rude, uncaring and wanted to know when I was going to stop taking this medication. I freaked out!!

Yes this illness is absolute hell - I used to think I'd rather have had an illness where I could just die because I wasn't living a life, I was just existing.  I felt my soul had been ripped from me, and there was nothing left except fear and dread.  Doesn't matter what I did, whether it's working, being with friends, on holiday, watching TV, reading a book .... this 'thing' was constantly in my head, in front of me, on my shoulder, inside me.  Only when I slept did I manage to escape, only for it to start all over again when I woke the next day.

This medication has been my saviour.  The side effects were scary, but nothing like the actual illness was.  It took a long time, and I'm so thankful that I'm now recovered and the illness seems a distant past.

In a strange way, I feel kind of grateful for the illness (I never thought I'd ever say that, and I never want to be back there).  I've become a much more humble and tolerant person, and count my blessings every day.

I hope my experiences can help others who are just starting their own journeys ........ yes this site is a great comfort for many.

I also hope you all have comfort and peace at Christmas ....... the New Year will bring fresh hope!

K xx