I've been ruminating now for just under a year over something that was said about my now girlfriend by a work colleague. It's been affecting me for a long time and I don't know how to just forget and move on. Can anyone help?
It depends on the situation you find yourself in. If it is a lack of trust or something is negative in your Girlfriend past you may be on a hiding to nothing, depending on your beliefs and understanding.
Personally this site is for Anxiety, and I am trying to place your worry and concern.
You have the choice of forgetting the problem or moving on, and if you are able to accept your concerns and fears. Only you can decide on that, and if someone is not truthful or using someones past to upset your relationship that will have to be addressed or you move on
BOB
It was basically a sly comment of her sleeping around work etc however I just shrugged it off at the time. I don't care about her past and she's been nothing but loyal to me it's just eating me up inside. I replay what was said and it winds me up to this day, like I should have done more maybe or been more assertive. Instead I just said I don't care and moved on. I'm not a confrontational person but sometimes I wish I could be to forgot about negative people and not let then rule my life
For whatever reason it struck a nerve with you. You cant do a thing about it anyway. A lot of ruminating thoughts come from wishing the past played out different. Its funny in a way. You can replay it a million times and guess what it is still in the past and happened already. Nothing new to learn from it at all. You wish too hard for a different past. most people with anxiety disorders, not the ones with bipolar, but the anxiety disorders tend to be people who hate conflict but are bothered by it. People pleasers and too empathetic for our own health and good.