Hi there,
In the past when I was abit younger I used to do drugs, I was not addicted to them, I just was a bit of a party animal and just wanted to experience what taking drugs was like. I have taken ecstasy and cocaine.
When I took them I’ve had some really horrible experiences and did not like them and I just keep getting flashbacks to being in that feeling of having a ‘bad trip’ and I will sit there and think myself into thinking I’ve taken this drug again somehow and that I’m in that ‘bad trip’ and it is just horrible.
I know that deep down I haven’t taken anything but I can literally make myself feel like I have. I always think ‘well what if my friend spiked my drink?’ And it is just so horrible as I don’t like drugs and I just keep having flashbacks and feelings of how bad I felt and the anxiety I felt when I was on them drugs.
It’s just annoying because I can literally just make myself feel like I’m having a bad trip even though I haven’t taken anything. So why do I keep getting these flashbacks and actually feeling like I’ve done a drug? I will sit there and think what If i accidently took it? Or someone spiked my food or drink?
Sorry if this is confusing but I really need some help and advice and how to cope with it because it’s really destroying me.