also some days it looks really red and then some days it doesnt
If you searched for typical symptoms of penile cancer I doubt very much whether this would be typical of those symptoms.
What age are you now Zach?
What is the most frequent source of irritation like this is something that is chemical based, and as we have contact with body cleansers, including soap and shower gel, most often, it is these kinds of thing we need to look to first as a potential source of irritation. Then some men apply skin creams, baby oil, Lubes and other lotions to their penis on a regular basis - sometimes it is not the action of one thing in particular, but an accumulative effect of different things that causes an irritation, and until these are all excluded from contact with the irritated skin, the irritation remains.
The starting point is to get hygiene right: no soap or shower gel on the head area of the penis - and on the foreskin if you are not circumcised - use water to clean, then make sure the skin is completely dry. When you are unable to wash after urinating, either use a paper tissue or toilet paper to remove any residue of urine from the head area of the penis.
If you need to achieve peace of mind with fears of penile cancer go see a Regular / Family Doctor or GP …
im 18 ive had this probably since i was 15 my anxiety has got bad and it just made me start worrying that it was cancer
So, as I say, get your hygiene right on anything that is emitted from the penis, get that right and keep it right will take care of most of this, if not all.
You will need to do this consistently, and I mean in excess of 5 or 6 months until you start to see any sign of a noticeable difference.