The main suspect is likely to be the condom, particularly if you had not used that brand / type before. Often it is what is on the inside of the condom that severely irritates the sensitive skin of the glans, added to that during sex there is a whole lot of friction going on between the inside of the condom and the skin it is in contact with. This makes any potential source of irritation that much more worse.
Not sure what you mean by ‘being heavy handed during clean up’ - do you want to clarify what happened during this?
Not sure why you need thrush cream, unless you were not using condom throughout sexual contact? So, your wife is right: thing about the condom you were using, is there a trusted one you have used previously, perhaps?
The other issue you need to be wary of is that the skin of the glans can potentially develop an intolerance, and should this occur the skin can become irritated by almost anything it is in contact with. The thing that contributes to this process is constant exposure to soap and body wash such as shower gel - try using water only, certainly until this irritation clears up, thereafter limit exposure to soap and body wash as much as you can. Make sure you dry the skin on the glans, and the the entire foreskin if you are not circumcised as a slight hint of dampness in the area can become an irritant, and can again, become part of a long-term issue.
I was rough with the towel when I was cleaning up, that’s what I mean by heavy handed.
the irritation has nearly disappeared. so it lasted 3 days.
it was the first time using condoms in 12 years as the skin of the glans is sensitive which makes my cum really quick and gets damaged easy.
thanks for your reply