Regular periods but perimenopause--is this possible?

Women's health
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Hello!

I am so glad that I found this forum! I read through many postings today and cried with relief.  I feel so bad inside. I miss myself--the me I used to be. 

I have a question--I am 49 years old and my period still comes regularly every 27 days.  It is a little lighter and slightly less painful, but still as regular and as disruptive to my life as when I was a teen.

At the same time, I have many of the symptoms of perimenopause--sweats, anxiety, constant feeling of dread, racing heart, brain fog, drop in sexual desire. I can't deal with my jobs, my dog, my house, my exercise routine...all of the thing the old me loved.

My period is here now so I am having trouble formulating my question....am I in for another 10 years of living in this liminal state where I suffer with regular periods like I am 20 and suffer with perimenopause symptoms like I am 50?

I feel like I am dying inside....

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Maddymom,

I am 60, and have been in menopause since I was 53.  I had a horrible time in perimenopause, and yes, with regualr periods.  But the things that you have mentioned, were also just as frustrating and dramatic for me.  I know how you're feeling.  Trust me, I do.  It's scary, isn't it?   Crazy how our life changes with this transition.  So to your question about 10 years of periods and crazy symtoms, I don't think so.  On average, you're a little to old to be having periods for the next ten years.  The average age of menopause is 52.   

Now in my situation, I did see some differences with my periods at age 43.  Lighter flow, sometimes clots, sometimes heavy stretchy mucus in the second half of the cycle.  And then a shortening of the overall cycles.  I had been like clockwork my entire adult life.  And I did, at the time, try several hormonal options.  I was put on a birth control pill and it was a total disaster.  Tried to use bioidenticals for two years, and that also was horrid.  So, eventually I went back to using nothing.  Over time I leveled out, and felt like my more normal self.    I had periods for the next 8 years, which slowly tapered off. (But then I was younger than you are right now.)   First it was a period every two months, then three, and then finally one every six months.  Then they finally stopped.  Oddly, I breezed through meno as though it was nothing.  No hot flashes, no night sweats, etc.  All those wonderful things, happened in perimenopause for me.   

But I will also mention, that menopause is not something that is "you have it and then you are done with it."  Nope, because our sex hormones interact with every other hormone system in the body.  So when we lose them, our other hormone systems change as well.  This is really a life transition.  Where our entire being is evolving and changing.  And it continues to change.  

Stinks, doesn't it?  Because i think if we had a choice in all this, we'd all pick staying about 40, with things running pretty smoothly.  

Sorry you are there right now, with all the changes I mean.  But it happens to all of us.  What you might do, is try to be very good to yourself.  Get to bed earlier and get some good sleep, eat well, drink good clean water, take a good mulit vitamin, exercise a little (don't over do it), take time everyday to focus on something you want to do just for yourself.  Anything you can do to help your body ease into this will be a benefit.  

I can't tell you how much I wish, I was the "ME" that used to be.  (And don't get me started on that wonderful vaginal atrophy and dryness.  Cause that's a real kick in the gut.)

  

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Oh Gailannie, thank you so much! Your thoughtful reply means the world to me. I needed your advice about nurturing the whole self during this transition. I was kicked out my house at 18 and didn't really have a mother. So even under normal circumstances, my ability to self-care is pretty compromised. 

I have read that peri/meno are a time when the unfinished business of the first half of your life asks to be processed. Sometimes not very nicely. I think that is true for me.

As you say, it does help to think of this as a life transition rather than an episodic condition that changes day to day, sometimes hour to hour.  Today I feel "mad as the sea and wind when both contend/ Which is the mightier." I am crying and raging inside about needs unmet. Hungry, but too cold to go out and get something I want to eat. 

It helps also to hear that meno was easier than peri for you. I take comfort in the fact that my body might be getting the hard changes done now and things will get better. 

After I wrote I was thinking that I might not mind being a slightly different 'me' than I was before peri. The externals of my life are so much better now than they were when I was 35. I wouldn't mind being a Me 2.0 who felt OK most days and had an extra £20 in my wallet.  

For today, I am going to do as you suggest: eat well, get some extra rest, and take an hour to read a book.  

Thanks to you, Gailannie, and all the wonderful women on this site for sharing your wisdom and experience with me. 

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What a wonderful discussion. I am 45 going through perimenopause trying all sorts of things for those symptoms mentioned above. How we wish we could be before 40 but alas it is not going to happen. Hard to accept at times and all these changes are justing making it worse. Keep posted 

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You've very welcome!  Hope it helps.

 

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Amen! Well said

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And you also have to remember that every one of us is different. I started peri around 45. Had a horrible 5 years and then a total hysterectomy at 50. Last year.

I was going to be one of those that went through menopause naturally. Someone had other plans for me though.

Remember also that you are not in "menopause" until you've gone a whole year without a period. Until then you are in peri.

I never made it to menopause naturally. I was thrown into it violently with the hysterectomy.

There was a cancer scare otherwise I never would have had the operation. All pathology reports are good

Everything gailannie says is so true. Take time for you. My Dr tells me the most important thing is for me to be well rested. As long as your mental health is on track you can work through anything else that comes along.

I too cried when I started reading these discussions. (My mom is gone also.) Before that I thought I was dying...

Hang in there♡♡

We all just need to be there for each other.

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thanks for your kind words and hope that someone understands the pain physical and mental that we are going through. I hope that everything is lot better for you now after 5 years of suffering through it.