Severe Anxiety triggered by moving out/changing "safe place"

Mental health
1

I'm 24 and I've lived in the same house my whole life. 18 years downstairs and then when I started college I moved into our little "studio" upstairs bonus room. Its been my ultament safe place for the past 6 years. My parents are like my best friends and its the most comforting thought to think that they are right downstairs if I have an emergency. I have major depressive disorder, and generalized anxiety disorder. I need someone to help take care of me sometimes, It can get really bad. sad But I'm so blessed I have figured out medication that helps a lot.

I'm actually getting married on Sept. 17th, and he is amazing. I'll be moving out right into his apartment after the wedding, and I am terrified. I don't know how to cope with moving my safe place to somewhere new. It's not close to home so I don't get to go there a lot. I love him loads and we have known eachother for years- it's not our relationship- its the space transition I'm so worried about. 

This worry is ruining the excitment I should be experiencing at this point in my life! None of my friends understand, and my fience is understanding but he still doesn't really get how horrible it feels for me.

Any coping advice is deeply appreciated. 

2

Hi Katherine I think a lot of people would find this stressful even those who do not suffer anxiety and depression.If l were you l would spend more time staying at your new apartment so it is not such a shock to your system.Also move your belongings in so it feels more like your home.Keep in mind even when you get married you can spend time with your parents and stay over.Just take it one day at a time you will get used to the change.

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Thank you so much!! I'm going to slowly start moving my stuff over, I agree it will help moving not feel like such a shock!

4

Good Katherine.Let us know how it goes.Just take it slow and steady.

5

Hi Katherine,

I literally made an account just so I could talk to somebody who feels the same way I do! I suffer from severe anxiety and my mum has always been the one who looks after me and understands. 

I am 23 and I moved out over the weekend with my boyfriend. It all happpened so quickly we were living at my mums house and on a whim found a perfect apartment, applied for it an all in a week we were moving. I didn't really get time to stop and think about it all. We moved in on Saturday only 20 minutes away from mums house. As soon as all the cleaning and organising was done and the apartment was set up perfectly I wasn't distracted from being so busy and I had an anxiety attack. All weekend I have been throwing up and crying trying to calm myself down. I feel like I am trapped and ended up having to come home to my mums last night and left my boyfriend to stay in the apartment on his own. Luckily he is really good and understanding with my anxiety. I feel so embarrassed and pathetic I am 23 years old and can't even move out of home 😩 I can't just keep running home eventually I was going to have to move out but it's so hard when your own room and bed and familiar surroundings are what make you feel better and they are all gone. I have never felt so lost so you are not the only one! 

Abbey 

6

Oh I'm so sorry!!

Thank you so much for replying, it is so comforting to hear from someone who really understands! You're the only one I've found who is in the same boat!

Anxiety attacks are so scary, anyone who hasn't had one doesn't understand. Are yours like a panic attack that comes and goes, or is a lingering attack that can last hours? I'm curious because mine last hours even days until I take knolopin. Are you on medication? 

You have to sometimes listen to your body and what it needs, even if it doesn't make since to anyone else!! I'm glad you went home where you wouldn't keep feeling sick. Even if you don't stay there forever, your body and mind needed to be able to relax! And thats OK! I'm hoping you'll be able to warm up to the surroundings and be able to move back in comfortably. <3 It may just take a little time!

You are NOT pathetic!! You struggle with something that the average person does not. Just because the "average" person may be able to transition without anxiety, that does NOT mean that you are a weaker person because you struggle with it. But it is hard when you feel alone in the struggle.

I'm literally getting married Sunday and I am terrified!! I can't hardly say that to anyone without freaking them out. I'm only in my bed for one more night! I know its not the end of the world if I need to come home a few nights. I hope that helps you feel any better, you are not alone in this odd predicament!! My fiance is so understanding as well, I don't know what I would do if he wasn't! Thats one of the big reasons I knew he was the one for me.  

Lots of love, lots of support, lots of prayers,

Katherine