Struggling to cope with my anxiety

Mental health
1

So ill start from the beginning well where i think it was anyway!

I have always had a fear of being sick ever since i can remember but it had always stayed at the back of my mind and didnt really cause any issues until about 5 years ago i was sick in the night through a bug and my at the time partner made such a big deal about it saying it was disgusting etc and since then i quicky went down hill i started feeling like if i went out and was sick would people think the same? Make a big fuss about it? I got so bad i wouldn't leave my flat i would hardly let anyone in in fear of it happening again i started having panic attacks thinking it was going to happen over and over again i shut myself away i didnt want anyone to see me or hear me being unwell. It got to the point where i stopped eating all day with just a tiny meal in the evening to just stop me feeling faint i was isolated through no fault of my own. Months past i lost about 3 stone and when someone saw me they pushed me to go get help from the doctors which i did in the end. They put me on sertraline tablets for depression and aniexty. The first few weeks was awful i couldn't sleep i was having panic attacks every half hour day and night but when they finally kicked in i started feeling abit more able to push myself to go out and do things i want to do.. that took me a good 4 years to get to where i am now yet i am still struggling to have a normal life. Working for me is a challenge i have none stop attacks when there even if i push through they just come back stronger i chew alot of chewing gum to try help calm down the attacks but it eas now caused me some health issues and i need to cut it out all together. How am i meant to cut the one thing out that helps me calm down? Im scared if i cant calm myself down what will happen? Will it just get worse like i was before? I know ive got through alot of it and achieved so much i just cant seem to shift it completely and im scared i never will.

2

Hi, I agree that it feels like it will never completely go away!

3

Hi Jade, I read your post and felt compelled to respond. I can totally relate to how you feel. It is a daily, hourly, minutely struggle to feel alright. I've had times when I just couldn't face anyone, including family members. You try and explain it to people, they may well listen. But unless you've actually experienced it, it seem hard for people to truly understand. If I were you Jade, I would go back to the doctor and emphasise that you are struggling to cope with the panic attacks. It seems the tablets you are on are geared towards treating the depression side of things, but not your anxiety. I really feel for you. Keep me posted, Donna x

4

Hello. I have anxiety also about germs. I've had this since the eighties. I've never had an eating disorder but I was on Peroxatine which is an anti depressant followed by a tranquiiser called Amisulpride. My anxiety got so severe that I was hospitalised at one point because of my safety in public places. When I'm anxious my stomach churns. Manchester isn't the cleanest of places and I was in a children's home in my teens where tummy bugs were rife. If you were sick they thought that you had an eating disorder or had taken drugs and got shouted at. The chicken wasn't cooked very well and they found out what was causing it and this happened in schools. I became a vegetarian for a while and ate well. I eat chicken now but I'm very careful. Gastro interitus can kill.Is it any wonder people feel anxious.