Need help what best thing to keep safe when you want to kill yourself
Hi, I'm not the best person to answer this but I wanted to reply. I have been in similar places... You say in your bio about panic attacks so try to focus on deep breaths for that, from the belly not the chest. Suicide isn't a way out of pain it just makes sure you're as close to it as possible, so please try to stop considering it. Try to give yourself a break from whatever thoughts are leading you there, you've got nothing to lose in any case, let a YouTube audiobook distract you for a couple of hours. Time might help give you a healthier perspective on things. It's not a rational act to kill yourself, so please keep telling yourself that you're being irrational, you might not know why or how to solve it in that moment, but if you can wrap it up with that label that has helped me in the past to at least know that its chemicals in my brain messing with me and I can wait them out, even if it seems totally rational, I know it's not. If the problem persists please search for the suicide prevention hotline in your country and call them for a talk.
You can go to A&E (ER) and they can put you on watch for a little while. That way, if you do attempt anything, you can get to the hospital very quickly.
Even just waiting in A&E can be good because you’re in a safe and public environment, massively reducing actually attempting to take your own life.