I HAVE HAD A FATHER AND BROTHER PASS ON.. AND IVE BEING IN 7 ARMED ROBBERIES... IVE SEEING THERAPISTS..... PUT ON ALL KINDS OF MEDICATION.... THE DEPRESSION OF BEING ALONE: AS WELL AS NOBODY UNDERSTANDING I AM GETTING TO THE END OF MY ROPE.. ONE CAN ONLY HOLD ON FOR SO LONG.
DO NOT KNOW WHERE TO FROM HERE OR EVEN WHY BOTHER.
Hi Angela,
I am really sorry to hear about what you are going through. My dad passed in January and he was my last family member.
I share the exact feelings that you do. I find that I can only talk to very few people about my depression because I have caused people to avoid me since they flat out don't want to hear about it anymore.
That is why I go on this site now.
I also feel like why bother. My only two reasons are I am afraid of being eternally damned if I kill myself and I am not sure who I would want to take my cats.
I don't want to make you feel worse. All I can offer is this forum and you will always have someone to talk to here. People say that it will get better and when I really think about that objectively I can kind of believe it. I am in the worst spot of my life. My work has slowed down, I'm single... So I guess, you and I have to believe that things can only go up.
I started volunteering. It gives me a sense of purpose. Maybe you can try that as well.
Please continue to post. I wish and pray the best for you.
Thanks for replying; because I hit such a bad patch in feb; I started going to church... ashamed to say i went cause i had no more options... it has absolutely helped but Its a work in progress and so many things hit you too your knees so you drift off the path.. I am also in the middle of closing a family business so its really emotionally draining... to just mention suicide; i do not believe in it as i do not think we have a right But that does not make us immune to complete breakdowns where you feel like you cannot turn to anyone.... i am TRULY so sorry for your loss.... it will never be something you get over but one day you will think of them and it will not hurt as much.... anytime you want to chat.... i am here
Hi Angela, I am really glad that you have a spirtual base. It is really the only thing I really have right now. I hope you can really continue with it and try and rely on God. In the end, he is all we really have.
Sounds like you too are being hit from all ends. Were the armed robberies at the family business?
So brutal.
I have also started exercsing daily and have given myself goals.
Maybe you should try something like that too. Since we are experiencing such a loss of control over so much, at least you can control your weight, how you feel physcially.
Come here to talk often. It really helps to know that there are people in same depths of depression and you are not alone. Try to get the worst of it out here. I have pushed away so many people with my moods. It is very disappointing that people that I have known for years and considered very close are really not there for me. I get it though, I am redundant in my conversations I cant step out of my depression for long and it is too much for people to deal with.
I used to love getting up and starting a day. I feel so different now.
I am glad you are not suicidal. That is a relief. Hopefully when the business is closed something new and good will replace it.
Maybe also you can try and talk with your pastor and also be put on a prayer list. Try and stay active. But when you feel down come here to talk.
dear angela,
i feel horrible for you. at times it truly can be a sad, scary life.
my only family member that was very kind to me passed away. it will be 10 years next month. it feels a whole lot more recent than that. sometimes i feel her with me, when i need her most. mostly when i feel like i'm going to lose it. i hope in time you'll feel your brother and father watching over you. sorry i dont have any great advice. just want you to know i sometimes ask myself the same thing as you. why bother.
fortunately, that miserable hopelss emotion of mine DOES pass. i hope you can feel better soon
truly, laura x
Hiya; i am sorry for your loss.... as the time goes sometimes it feels like its getting harder to accept. But its always a part of you... my moments are not passing as quick as they used to which is a bit worrying: but i guess we all have a testimony on our journeys... guess we just Dont give up.
Hi Angela,
You have certainly gone through a great deal. Why, we all ask that same question when we are faced with tragedy or life changing circumstances.
And that is what you have endured, but more times that most of us. To me , if I had come through such testing times, I am not sure how I would cope but you have taken a big decision to share with this site.
Everyone here faces many challenges in life and most will be happy to assist you if we can.
Best of British luck to you.
Mike.
Hi hi. Thanks for your reply; you are right everyone is going through something... suppose thats life... i guess everyone gets so hammered down that you feel like theres no hope... but this page in itself is such a blessing... the fact that people really listen here is just amazing. So thanks.
Stick to the meds. If they are not helping, talk to your dr. Maybe you need a higher dose or to try some other ones. Good luck