The mind goes wild during menopause!!!! Need to talk!

Women's health
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Does anyone feel like they just want to run away? My job and my coworkers are getting on my nerves(I don't like my job, but I like my coworkers). I'm also feeling paranoid like I might get fired(I know this is not true). I feel worthless like life is passing me by.

​Also does anyone feel like they are going insane or dying?  I try to help myself by praying, exercising, drinking plenty of water, taking a multivitamin, garlic oil, fish oil, D3 and I'm going to start taking turmeric, it's supposed to help with a lot of things but I want to take it because it is a anti inflammatory and also helps with anxiety(I hope to be able to get off the antidepressant).

​I'm taking a mild antidepressant called Trazodone, and I have Valium for the really rough days(I only take it about twice a week anyway).  Sometimes I can go for a week and feel "normal", no dark thoughts, just happy and looking forward to the future and then boom! The craziness is back!  I can't imagine how I would feel if I were not doing the few things I'm doing. I have crazy thoughts like I'm going to kick the bucket before I have a chance to live out at least most of my dreams(I try to pray those thoughts away).  Anyway sorry this is so long, I just wish I felt more like me again!!rolleyes

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Hi Juanita, 

   Life sure does change, doesn't it?  If I remember this correctly, you tried HRT and had a horrible time with it.  

I think one of the worst things about menopause, is our loss of self.  Things that used to roll off our backs, just don't any more.  We feel completely different both inside and out.

   I sure wish I had something good to offer beside emotional support.  Just know you aren't alone, or crazy.  It sounds like you're trying to do all the right things to support your body.  I'm just not sure we'll every feel like our "old self" after menopause. I miss that girl too!   

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Hi Juanita, I can't say it any better than Gailannie did... it sounds like you are doing everything you can to support yourself.  I miss myself, too, but sometimes I catch glimpses of who I used to be.  It would help if the fog in our minds would lift and give us more room to breathe.  I keep hoping things will be better someday.  Wishing you all the best.  Take care.

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Bless your heart. I can so relate. Totally know how you feel. Some days I feel so anxious and terrified. Im trying to rely on God more.

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Omg this is exactly how I feel.although i love my job.my boss called me in today because I've not been myself.i cried as usual.i hate this feeling.anxiety is mental.horrible thoughts.im normally happy but am so miserable x

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Hi Kim, I worry that this could happen to me, too.  I'm the oldest employee in my group and tend to worry that some of the others don't like working with me.  Anxiety is so awful.  I do as much as possible to be part of the group, but it's mostly young men and we just don't have much in common.  Hoping things get better for you very soon and I'm sorry about your meeting; I've cried once in front of my manager and know how awful that feels.  Take care and here's a hug (((Kim))).

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Yes,...  my mind is going crazy too.   I'll be doing good then out of nowhere I'll feel tired and weak which lasts for a few weeks. Or anxiety will come about and I'll get freaked out about work or something.. And yes, (not sure if being married is the problem) but there are times where I just want to get away or dream about my life being single and older which means no one can bother me!!  : )   Yes, I too try just about everything so that I can get back to normal-- swimming helps me especially my feet but I don't always want to go..

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Aww thank you hun it's awful isn't it bloody men don't have to do this lol onwards and upwards isn't it 😀😀

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Thank you for replying ladies. I have a job where I'm on call(but I very rarely get called out).  But my Supervisor just informed me to be prepared to be called out tomorrow night(Friday)and that it would be late like after midnight. While this was okay when I started this job and was younger and full of hormones, I just find myself wanting to quit. It seems like this week my Supervisor had been doing little things to get me to quit. I did have a meltdown Tuesday and threatened to resign(she didn't seem to care). I have never been trained properly for my job and I have never felt I was good at it.  Now at 58 I don't want to have to get out of bed at 2am, or in this case I have no idea when they might call so basically I will have to stay dressed tomorrow night and not go to bed. 

​I'm so close to resigning, but I can't afford to right now. It's just weird it's happening now VICE has NEVER called us out.  I'm Victim Advocate by the way, a very burned out one. She and this other coworker are friends and I mentioned to her how burned out I was and now I think she's just doing things to just push me out the door, because I'm sure she told her about how burned out I am and they don't need a burned Victim Advocate working here. Just thinking about being called out gives me heart palps and a queasy stomach.

​You ladies have just helped me so much. Between, God, you ladies, and a new male friend(we decided to be friends first and if turns romance fine)who actually listens to me and makes me laugh, I'll be able to make it through this.  Okay, rant over.  For now, Lol

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Thank you gailannie.  Yes, HRT and I don't play well together. I can't believe you remembered that! 

​The emotional support is VERY important to me. 

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Thank you. I can always count on you ladies.

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God and this forum have been my saving grace.

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I detest my job(I didn't use to). Read my reply below to see how that hot mess is going. Lol

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I know right? I have to make myself go to the gym.  My work life is pretty crappy right now. I don't what happened. But what can I do? Right now I have to work. I dream of retirement EVERY day. Lol

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No apologies necessary, Juanita...we totally feel what you're saying . I know I have felt like you have...off and on...quite often. When I get to the point of tears, and hit my knees in prayer, is when I usually get a reprieve. Or a period. 😒 Seems to rebalance me.

Keep talking it out to empathetic women like the wonderful ladies in this forum. We uplift each other!

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Thank you so much❤❤❤❤

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LOL... work and menopause are indeed a hot mess!  🤣

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Similar situation here... my job is really the kind of thing that attracts young people and that’s who my boss wants working for him.  He’s stuck with me because I was already there before he became the manager.  I am desperate to find another position with people I can relate to more and work that is more meaningful.  He’s been trying to shove me out the door for years.  I know some of how you feel being burned out at work.  Dealing with peri on top of that is like throwing gasoline on a fire.

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Amen.

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Hi Juanita

yes you are NOT alone.

I feel cookoo sometimes/most times... and i know its the hormones, its like im becoming a different person, and have lost my old self. 

I tried hrt and bio hrt for months on end and now ive realized that they did not help. Im hoping i dont get worse bu im tapering carefully. Ive tried antidepressants and can not tolerate. I take lots of supplements and whows if my digetion is good enough to be able to utilize them because without a healthy gut, you dont absorb anything.

I think this time of our lives is meant to go deep, reinvent ourselves, learn from the past, be gentle with ourselves. 

My moods are completely altered now in menopause, its been very difficult. I make each day to be a challenge, and if i make it through the day i am proud of myself at night for getting through. I go to bed and no matter how rotten and dark i felt, i give thanks for my life, my boys, having been given this gift.

For me its day to day for sure. 

I have found it to be a time for renewing, acceptance, saying goodbye to the past, and be gentle with ourselves.

Also to find joy in anything everyday, its really hard when you feel empty, but life is precious and i look around me and see that in nature, and in my kids. I see this in the hearts of all the women here also, i feel supported and loved. 

I totally understand you Juanita, and i am with you on this as well. I am grateful for this forum, we are in this together..truly.

xoxox