Think I may be having a GH outbreak (I pray not), how to discuss with my boyfri

Sexual health
1

I have been sexually active with my partner for roughly a month and a few days, two days ago I felt quite sore around the entrance of my vagina and assumed it was friction burn from the excessive sex we have been having . I decided to shave and have a little look down there, to my dismay I noticed 4 sores that resemble canker sores two on each side of my labia. These sores are not clustered together nor are they blisters which make me hesitant to believe they are an outbreak of herpes.

We both have very high sex drives and in the week or so leading up to getting these sores we had been having intercourse 3-5 times each day (rough). Could the sores be a result of the large amounts of sex we've had especially as I wasn't always properly wet at times? Or could it be something more sinister such as herpes?

Apologies if this is TMI, but I also experienced large amounts of white cottage cheese like discharge which is abnormal as my discharge is usually that of a egg white texture at this point in my cycle. I haven't felt any extreme itchiness, the most is an itch or a uncomfortable feeling. I've read up that its possible to have Yeast infection sores, but very uncommon.. I took a bath in warm water mixed with baking powder and let myself soak as advised for 15-20 minutes, baking powder is meant to help rebalance the pH levels and it did indeed help reduce the discharge I'm receiving which is now little to non.

I'm honestly hoping that these sores are nothing untreatable, especially as I have never experienced anything like them. I'm going to my local doctors first thing monday and then going to my walk in sexual health clinic to have a full STI check.

I don't know how to approach this with my boyfriend, I fear that he will leave me at the slight possibility of having herpes. I mean who would even take the chance of getting it. I contacted the last person I had oral and vaginal sex with (prior to my boyfriend) regarding this, he was able to show proof that he had gotten a check up shortly after we were intimate and he was clean which has eased my mind. Does this mean that if I have indeed got the virus that it was my boyfriend that gave it to me? Or could it be possible that the virus was dormant in me and I simply didn't pass it on to my previous partner.

Also there are two slightly swollen pea sized balls beneath my skin, in the valley of where my thigh meet my groin are these swollen lymph nodes? And are they related to my sores, as far as I can remember other than the sores I've experienced no illness no fever aches or pains etc

Apologies for such a long post but I am distraught at the concept of having herpes, I've never even had a coldsore as far as I can remember. I'm only 18 and theres such a stigma attached to the STI, I feel disgusting and looking at the sores make it a 100 times worse. Would I even be able to deliver children vaginally? Or would they be infected too? Will my vagina ever look normal again? I already have one incurable autoimmune disease (Systematic lupus in which my immune system attacks itself) but being burdened with herpes will shatter me.

I really thought I had found the perfect guy, he's so good to me and tries his best to ensure I'm comfortable to talk about anything with him. I just can't bare to discuss my fears with him, I fear rejection. Should I tell him my fears or wait until I have been doctors and received definitive results. He's already beginning to question what's bothering me and keeps asking me what's on my mind, I just feel like crying.

2

I ally like quite possibly herpes. I don't necessarilyily see any reason to go to two doctors unless the first cant provide the test you need.

Your ex - unless he specifically requested HSV Test, they won't do one. HSV and some others (trichomoniasis, HPV, syphills) are not automatically part of even a full std screen. From what I've read, your symptoms may also be syphills. Much less common, but more Serious, bu

3

I'm pretty sure my GP doesn't give full STD checks, but its worth trying as its much closer.

And its crazy to me that testing for HSV isn't as commom as testing for Chlamydia, from what I've researched it's becoming a slight epidemic as many people are unaware they have the virus and unknowingly pass it on.

If you don't mind me asking do you have HSV?

4

Unfortunately a regular std test doesn't test for hsv. the only way to accuretly test for herpes is to get a culture done during an outbreak of blood work. Other then that it's tricky to catch. I am a women with genital HSV1 and have only been sexually active with two men whom I've been in long relationships with. I'm still with my second partner, and I had my first outbreak about three weeks ago. It started as an irritation and some redness which I assumed could have been chafing from my thong, later on came this little lump that I assumed was another abcess(which I'm prone to because I have an immune deficiency) so I went to see my OBGYN and she diagnosed it as herpes right off the jump, but tested the spot anyways. As the day went on the lump sort of flattened out and I had two ulcers that weren't pus'y or painful unless urine hit them. I began getting a few more twords my anus but even when I googled I found nothing that looked like mine so I was positive I didn't have it. Like how could I? Neither of my partners had cold sores. But sadly, I got a call explaining that I had genital HSV1 and shortly after I began getting what's then known as a painful breakout with flu like symptoms and swollen lymph nodes in my groin. Anyways, point is my doctor explained that this is actually VERY common and it's not nessesarily an STI either. It's a mere skin condition, like shingles, that flair up because the herpes virus lies dormant and can for years and years. I wouldn't worry so much about feeling dirty. I'd really look into support groups like this and do your research. It's stressful and tough, but I promise it isn't as bad as you think. 1 in 3 people have it.

5

Thank you for taking the time to respond, after researching more it's calmed me down. After realising how many people have this condition it made realise its nothing other than just that, a skin condition. It also seems as though people who have been diagnosed are much safer and informed when it comes to sexual health aswell as general health. Although I'm pretty sure that it is indeed herpes, even if it isnt all my research has definitely opened my eyes wide! I'm coming to terms with the possibility, my next obstacle is discussing this with my partner and overcoming my fear of rejection or judgement. I have a bad habit of obsessing over possibilities and convincing myself that google is always correct, convinced myself I had tongue cancer at one point lol so I'm hoping this is the case and I do not have the condition.

If you don't mind me asking how did you approach this with your partner, did you tell him from the first suspicions or did you wait until you knew for sure. Also how old are you?

6

I'm 23 and I honestly told my partner the second I came out of my doctors office and got into the car. I broke down and was going insane for a week straight, I didn't even get out of bed I was beyond depressed because "why me, how could this have happened". But he was very understanding, we've been together over 3 years and it didn't bother him at all. He told me to stay positive because it's a possibility it wasn't but I knew it was just by my symptoms. Since then I've been cleared up from my outbreak and we've been sexually active with one another as if it's never happened. Hasn't changed a thing! It actually made us a lot closer to one another. Neither of us questioned infidelity either, we have a very strong relationship. We understand that this strain I have could have come from him, his ex or even mine! It's one of those freak things. I would definitely wait to get results unless you're seeing all of the symptoms associated with HSV. It's usually a self diagnos type of deal. You can tell what it is just by looking at it. But bring the conversation up on a very calm manner, and if he doesn't understand and he wants to leave then let him. People don't realize that HSV can be passed soooo easily and while he may have it and never show symptoms, it could have been transmitted to you and if your immune system was a tad bit weak or if you're run down your outbreak will happen. It all depends on the strains as well. HSV1 you'll get one or two outbreaks and that's it , usually especially in the genitals since that isn't the place that hsv1 usually lives, the outbreaks are rare. VS HSV2 which causes multiple outbreaks and they're a lot more painful.

7

Went to the clinic today, 3 hours wait to be given a visual diagnosis of herpes and to also be diagnosed of BV surprisingly. Which makes sense as my partner did express that down below smelt a little off recently but I put that down to stress diet and him ejaculating inside of me. I got a full check (blood test and swabs) the woman also took a swab of the sores which was extremely painful I actually cried out in pain. I asked her if it was possible to get a bloodtest and she said they don't even provide bloodtests only swabs if sores are present.. WTF?? So now I'm wondering how we're going to find out if my boyfriend also has it since he doesn't have any symptoms or sores to swab.

Today's been so hard I practically broke down as I left the clinic, been crying so much my eyes are literally bloodshot and telling my boyfriend was the worst part. He was asking me what's wrong and if I'm not happy with him etc, he even asked if I was pregnant and began getting happy lol. Hated bursting his bubble and tbh I'd much rather be pregnant than dealing with this. He's being so supportive and telling me we'll treat it together.. when he asked if it can go away I felt so bad at the thought of giving it to him. He's currently saying that he still loves me and his opinion of me hasnt changed, we'll see if he feels the same if my results come back positive. I wouldn't blame him if he doesn't want to be with me because of it but I definitely would be devasted. Fingers crossed for the best xx

8

Ugh I'm so sorry Hun. The initial diagnosis is the hardest part. It feels like your life is going to end, I know how you feel. If he says he is ok and doesn't feel any different twords you then believe him and open up to his love. I didn't believe my boyfriend would even touch me ever again and I was wrong, it gets easier I promise. As long as he is understanding of this and is willing to still be with you then so be it! It's very possible that you have this virus and he might not. If it's HSV1 it's rare to pass it on genitally when there's no outbreak present and that's because HSV1 lives in the mouth and when it's on the genitals the outbreaks aren't as bad and rarely even happen because that's not the place it usually lives in. The outbreaks will go away before you know it and you'll feel back to normal again. And they do offer blood tests to test for the specific strains , he may need to see his regular doctor. I don't know why yours said that they don't do blood tests. That's false.