I've had Depression since I was 18 and for the last 9 years it has been under control. A few months back it started coming back and getting worse. I started seeing my Psychologist again and put on new antidepressants. After 2 months I'm not noticing a difference but the opposite. I'm having horrible mood swings, crying spells, outbursts and etc. I have never felt so low in my life and for the 1st time I have had suicidal thoughts. I feel so depressed and worthless I don't know what to do. I have nobody to talk to because everyone dismisses it as drama. I'm afraid to go to the hospital because they will lock me up in a mental hospital. I just need someone to talk to and comfort me. I feel like nobody would care if I did do something to myself including my family. I can't shut my mind off and I can't focus or stop crying.
im so sorry i suffered with bad depression too ;( do u also suffer with derealization too?
Hi Nik
I think the new antidepressants are not suited to you or the dose needs adjusting. Please go to the doctor and get some help. I am like you at the moment on new ones waiting for them to kick in its horrible but do something as soon as possible. You will get better. Just keep posting on here for help all these posters have suffered or are suffering just like you. People who dont have this find it hard to understand and even when we are better its hard helping others with it as there is nothing we can do but tell them they will get better. pls go to doctor
Yes I do. I'm just constantly criticizing myself, being and thinking negative and I think everyone feels/thinks the same way. I'm also very paranoid and anxious
i understand u completely its so scary! i lost my mom 3 years ago it tramatized me so much watching her suffer ny depression hit me bad i felt hopeless cried everyday missing my mom and bad anxiety paranoid along with stupid derealization and brain fog i hate it sm!
Oh my gosh I'm so sorry for your loss! I can't even imagine what that must have been like. All I know is depression is one sneaky, scary b******!!
Hi jran,
I have an appt on 1/6 with a new doctor because I have no insurance so I can't afford to see my previous one. I'm hoping they will up the dose and add a mood stabilizer because I think I could be bipolar. Anyway having no insurance has caused a lot of delays in getting proper mental treatment and I have a chronic pain issue that is also going on simultaneously. Both of these mixed have basically thrown me over the edge. Mentally I'm a mess and physically I'm in horrible pain. Plus I can't go to the ER because w/ no insurance it would be a lot of money plus they treat people like me like crap and druggies looking for a quick score.
i couldnt see your comment ;(
It moderated me that's why. I just said I was so sorry to hear about the loss of your mom and I couldn't imagine how hard that was. Depression is no joke and it really does some crazy, horrible things to us. I just wish more people understood and had sympathy for it.
thank you. i actually went to my drs app crying ive been a mess i miss my old self im on antidepressants i feel less depressed but now im anxious have brain fog and some derealization i hate it ;( i just wanna be happy u know?
I know exactly how you feel! I miss the old me and the happy, up for anything, goofy me. Now I'm just a walking zombie, I'm so moody, easily offended/sensitive, anxious, overcautious and etc. Oddly my antidepressants aren't helping so I've gotten way worse the last few days. Plus I have chronic pain that has been causing problems right now as well. So basically I have 2 major issues mentally and physically I'm trying to control and failing.
yeah im on 2 weeks taking sertraline i feel less depressed just cant rid this damn fog and out of it ness and anxiety i want my old self back. i hope u start to feel better soon
Thank You! Same to you as well!
I I am so sorry to hear you feel so bad. I have felt that way before. If you are taking new medication, perhaps it is not the right kind for you. When you see the new doctor maybe he or she will decide on a different medication.
Also it takes time for a new medication to start working.
Take care of yourself. We are here for you.
Hi no one is going to lock you away in a mental hospital unless you are out of control, a danger to yourself or to others. Are you?
It sounds like your meds aren't working so you need to go back to your doctor pronto and discuss this. x
I'm not a danger to myself or others physically. I'm just mentally destroying myself to the point I can't even function. I don't have insurance so I can't see my Shrink because its almost $200. IDK what to do??
Sorry I'm in the UK so don't know anything about medical insurance. Are you in the USA? Hopefully a member who is there will come in to help. x
Medical insurance is very poorly run here in the US. IDK if in the UK all people have medical insurance but in the US we don't. You only get it through job benefits or you pay out of pocket which is very expensive. I'm waiting for Medi-Cal which is insurance for people with low incomes but it takes quite some time.
I think the system in USA is barbaric and I have heard of people dying though lack of money. We have the NHS here which is free to all. A few people have private insurance, mainly the wealthy but the vast majority don't. David Cameron is trying to privatise it now just leaving a very basic service for most of us and is promoting private medicine. Well he is a multi millionaire so it's ok for him and his ilk. Not the rest of us though. Bev x
Our whole country is a mess. We really need to follow what the UK and Canada do w/ providing medical insurance to everyone. Too many people are dying because physicians and hospitals treat you very differently based on if your insured so they miss a lot of simple things that could be caught earlier and save lives. People go broke or work obscene amounts of jobs to get med insurance. It's a joke here. Plus we give free insurance to people who immigrate but not the natural citizens, how messed up is that. They have better rights than us.