hello I suffer from anxiety both general and health. I am 71 with various health conditions especially arthritis in knees spine and neck, and diverticular disease, gastritis and ibs. A lot of my anxiety is to do with health as I never know from day to day how I will feel. I have had CBT counselling on more than one occasion but have never really got it completely under control. I have been more anxious these last few months due to various things but now it is worse. We have to go to a funeral tomorrow which involves a 200 mile drive. We are going at 6am tomorrow morning as we know from experience we might be lucky but it could take double the time depending on the motorways. The funeral is in the afternoon and we are staying one night returning home Wednesday morning. I keep having panic attacks about going my husband and daughter who are also coming know I do not want to go but just dismiss it saying you will be fine. It is not the funeral but the upheaval going early upsetting medication times and the thought of going to the toilet at a service station is really making me anxious different goodness etc I just know I will not feel well and will want to come home. I don't sleep well and the last few nights hardly at all I am always away most of the night if we go away. Why do they not understand how I feel they don't understand how going away affects me. My husband is not that sympathetic and just says don't go then but we are going. The thought of staying home alone For 2days is as bad as going. What can I do to make things easier. My digestion always plays up when we go away. I realise it is a lot to do with my anxiety but I feel That I get talked in to things too easily .
- I’ve found that most people will never truly understand anxiety unless they experience it themselves. I’ve had others put down my fears/anxieties also, and I don’t think they do it to be mean, but they just don’t see what the big deal is and don’t understand.
- Unfortunately sometimes with anxiety you have do things you don’t feel comfortable with, but try rationalizing your fears in your head… Yes, your med times are disrupted, yes you have to use a service station bathroom, yes you will probably feel uncomfortable… but none of these things are harming you or your health, and you aren’t going to die. It’s just a small trip, a tiny blip in your whole life, and even though you may be uncomfortable, you will survive it and make it through. I know it’s tough but just keep reminding yourself of that, and that it isn’t forever and soon it’ll be over and u’ll be back home! That’s what I do with situations like this.
Thank you for your kind words.
Hi. i totally get where you are coming from, my anxiety has been so bad since last April/May time & to keep this as short as possible I had book our two weeks holidays during my non anxious days!! So I could see myself not being able to go, like you, didnt sleep for days before going, we had three hour drive to Airport, then transfer to plane, I swear someone up above was having a laugh at me, you see I could see myself falling down escalators or falling in the Q for check in etc. etc., this was before I had even left the house!! BUT I got there, was a bit uncomfortable and in all my times going through that airport we never had to go up and down so many stairs, I really thing we were on every escalator in that building (hence me thinking they were having a laugh up above!) 3 hours flight, 1 hour to the resort, checking in etc., AND I DID IT what I am trying to say is (yup I will get there!) we are all stronger than we think we are, what I/we “think” we cant do, we can and have done it. So get up, keep busy, have your meds with you, maybe count all the blue or red cars ye meet or houses with red doors, anything to distract yourself enroute and when you get to the funeral, distract yourself as in “what is she wearing that for…” “what kinda shoes are those…” yes, I know it a funeral but needs must - lol. with regards to your husband have you ever sat down and tried to explain how all this crap know as anxiety effects you, I didnt talk to my husband until someone on this site told me to tell him how I was feeling and my fears & you know what, it has helped so much, he gets it a little bit better now. Anyway, you got this and you are so much stronger than you think you are so go for it and safe journey. Oh ya, let me know how many red doors you count and awful shoes… lol … GO GIRL x
i am like this. i cannot go far, havent been able to go see family for ages, all stems they say from anxiety. tried to give me anti deps but none worked, made my mind and stomach worse. not on any now. what do you take that has helped
I think it’s awful that you are dealing with anxiety at 71. My mother is 76 and has other ailments. I could not imagine her having to deal with anxiety as well. I truly feel bad for you. I have noticed that my anticipation is ALWAYS worse than the actual event. I just found out this morning that our good neighbor 25+ is being taken off life support. I can already feel my anxiety rise kinowing I will have to attend the viewing. But, I know I will endure. And, you will too.
^ she was our neighbor for 25+ years.
Thank you to everyone who kindly relied to my post. Your kind words and advice are much appreciated. Sorry I have not replied to you all individually but have been away for the funeral.
We are coming home today. I am sitting in the hotel after a bad nights sleep due to anxiety and arthritic pain having had a shower waiting for my husband to wake. So the journey down was much better than anticipated. We made good time leaving at 6am arriving at 11.15am. Luckily our rooms were ready so we were able to chill out before going to the crematorium. The funeral was one of the best services I have ever attended, of course it was hard and upsetting. It was nice so to catch up with old neighbours and for our three children all to be together. On the down side my digestive complaints are playing up, although they usually do when I go away. Tomorrow morning I have a gp appointment and have made up my mind that I am going to get this anxiety under control no matter how long it takes then I will tackle my other health problems. Well hopefully my husband will be awake soon ( he could sleep for England) and I will go and see if my daughter and granddaughter are awake before we all go out for breakfast than then home we go.
well done x
Thankyou.
hello apart from CBT which helped a bit I have not taken any medication. I have so far said no to anti anxiety tablets because of the side effects. I felt they would make my digestive problems worse but more importantly I am worried about taking them because I have glaucoma. Although they say they are safe for the common form of glaucoma which I have they are contraindicated in the other types because they raise the eye pressures. I just don’t want to take the chance. I might ask my consultant at the eye clinic what he thinks. A. couple of years ago I started taking steroid nasal spray for rhinitis but the spray caused a rise in eye pressures and I had to stop them 6 weeks later they were to base level. Sorry I can’t be more helpful. Seeing gp tomorrow.
hello, im in the same position right now, im going on holiday this weekend and its a 5 and a half hour drive and i am panicking like mad! i dont even know why the reason changes every hour, i dont think im going to be able to do it but all i can do is try. reading your post and the fact you made it has given me the hope i need for my journey
Hello I know how you feel. I t is especially as others cannot understand which sort of makes it worse. Are you doing all the driving or sharing it. I don’t drive so did not have that to contend with. My main problem is panic and sleeping. What I found helped if this makes sense is to divide the holiday into sections in your mind and just deal with one at a time. Don’t know what time you are going but think how you can make the journey easier. I tried to think about relaxing and and trying to enjoy the journey down, then booking into the hotel and unpacking, etc, the funeral and afterwards and the evening and going to bed and then the journey home the next day. You have said that you don’t know why you are panicking the reasons keep changing. I think that is common. I am glad to be back but have woken up with anxiety this morning it is because I have gp appointment about anxiety. I think just concentrating on one part of the holiday at a time and not thinking beyond . I get overwhelmed with lots of things happening or do so that helps me. I hope you have a lovely holiday. Please do post back on this forum when you come back you may find some tip which will help others, Good luck.
i am still the same. i have this innate fear of everything, going a journey is one of them. i have had to let my hubby attend funerals for me over last couple of years. no anti depressant has been tolerable and theyve put me on valium, say its a low dose but i now find i cant do without. my sleep is very erratic. i see gp today, she will just dole out more, i think there must be another route and wish i c ould find it. anxiety is something id never even had till my sixties. sometimes i feel i am going mad. please, anyone have anything helped
well since i am extra late i would like to know how did the trip go?? and believe me i know exactly how u felt my husband isnt too understanding as well and we had to do a drive from BOSTON TO CALIFORNIA thats about 3500 miles i panicked all week until the day we left and i panicked all the way til we reached our destination. being in the car too long gives me claustrophobia. i had HORRIBLE symptoms if shortness of breath i felt like i could barely breathe the whole 4 days. i couldnt eat for 2 of those days i had NO appetite what so ever i would just feel nauseated and pick on my face as a nervousness thing.. i pretty much made my husband drive the whole way by himself not to mention we had two children with us. i was a nervous wreck. but i dont know what came over me but once we reached Albuquerque New Mexico something came over me and i was ready to drive .. my husband wanted to stop and go to sleep and i wanted to hurry and get to san diego because we were so close.. so it was like a rush a 8-9 hour rush i would not get out of the driver seat lol i stared getting sleepy and instead if switching with my husband i would take a 30 min nap and just Keep freaking going until i got us there .sorry for the long post just thought id share my experience with u.. i hope your trip wasnt nearly as bad as mine .lol .