This is my first time posting so I apologise now for the length! Things have been bad for years now, I've had counselling but that had to come to an end. I feel the reasons that sent me into depression are in the past but I can't get back to the happy, funny, full of life person I used to be. My social skills are terrible now, I literally want to become a recluse at times. I struggle keeping a conversation going and get very uncomfortable when there is silence I feel like I've caused it. I've tried telling myself do this, make this change in your life and things will get better. But it dosent i feel I take 1 step forward 3 back.
Hhhm.....perhaps its time to consider short term pharmaceutical assistance
Small steps, recognise your successes. Change takes times. Xxxx
Did the counselling help?
Sometimes talking therapy is better than
medication.
Talk with your GP who may know of another type of. Counselling.
Keep trying I found I hard but took some courses, frightening at first but it helped me x
I try tell myself that I am stronger and that I can beat this, it's hard for me to ever take the next step because I'm so up and down
I can really relate. I'm having a tough time at the moment and have been for months. I am managing at work but the idea of socialising really makes me so very nervous. I was on a course this week and normally I would make small talk however I just didn't know what to talk about other than how rubbish things have been and how terrible I feel which isn't a great conversation to have with people you don't know!
I have a lot of Terry Pratchett "Trousers of Time". If only I hadn't given up on Sara we would have married and been happy. so I'll never be married, cause my life should have gone to the left not the right where it is. I feel as if i've been left behind. My life is Denials instead of New Opportunities.
Recently, I got as far as engagement before it fell apart (geez) but at least I got that far.
Am looking at accomodation in a different area of Sydney, Aussie, and have discovered that hiding in one area stank. I'm discovering nice places.
My social skills were never good. I was always full of TV's going thru scenarios so much that I couldn't really say much. Couldn't even listen well cause of this, as I'd get "does she like me? no? well maybe" and then find she was waiting for a reply and I hadn't heard what she asked.I try to fill in the silence with anything so I end up talking to people for 2 1/2 hours about very detailed stuff un till they pull the plug and I feel that ive failed.
So maybe not filling in is good hey? 
With all relationships/friendships there are silent periods, silences in conversations. It's natural.
When you meet someone try to ask questions like what's your favourite colour, food, ask them about their life, not too deeply though.
People respect those who are willing to listen to them and take an interest in them.
Think about trying that.
Even if its only" are you having a good time ?"
Xxxc