Ways of dealing with the symptoms

Sexual health
1

I've just recently gotten over a primary occurence of genital herpes. I can honestly say it was the most painful experience of my life. I caught it as a result of my boyfriend performing oral sex on me whilst suffering from a cold sore.

The symptoms lasted just under 2 weeks, and have cleared up due to a five day course of anti-viral medication (aciclovir.) I have a great deal of empathy for anyone who is or has suffered from this condition. It seems the only thing I wanted to do whilst suffering from this was curl up in bed and try not to move around. However, putting my life on hold was not an option so I took paracetamol at regular intervals and bought myself an anasthetic cream (Lanacane) from my local pharmacy. The cream helped but needed reapplying very often so if you can find yourself something stronger such as an anasthetic ointment I highly recommend you do. Urinating was extremely painful (as a woman) so I found myself catching urine in a container so as to reduce the chance of irritating the blisters/sores - hopefully someone will find this useful.

I have pulled through and am amazed at how much I was taking for granted simple things such as being able to walk around, sit on hard chairs and urinate without pain. Keeping a positive mental attitude is important too, I was constantly telling myself through the pain that this was my body, and I have control over it - I would not be kept down by these symptoms.

2

I am currently part way through a primary occurance of genital herpes (8 days in!!). I can agree with the comments above...I too have found this to be the most painful and miserable experience of my life! I cannot sit, lay down or stand without being in a lot of pain, subsequently I have probably had about 8 hours sleep in the past week - I am exhausted. I finding going for a pee absolutely unbearable ( will try the tip in the previous post next time I need to go- thanks!!) and am very tearful and irritable. It has also made me realise that everything I normally do (sit down, stand up, lay down, walk, etc) I definately take for granted and once I have recovered from this I will make the most of being able to move around pain free!

Currently, I find the only time I am in the slight bit comfortable is when I am totally absorbed in doing something - taking my mind off it! One of the reasons I am writing this....but then obviously to let others know of my experience incase any of it may be of help! I have found crosswords and similar puzzles good for taking my mind off it, watching TV, reading a book or magazine isnt quite enough to completely distract my attention from the pain!

I am still trying to ascertain when I caught the virus as I am in a long-term faithful relationship with my boyfriend who does not appear to have ever had any symptoms of genital herpes (or even a cold sore!!). Although apparently he can take a blood test to find out whether he carries the virus!? Im still trying to understand whether I may have been infected during a previous relationship (years ago) and have only just had a primary occurance!?

I began on Sunday evening feeling generally a bit crap and the glands in my groin were quite tender. By Monday the glands in my groin were very tender and my genitals were sore. I managed to go to work but as soon as I got home I put on my PJ's and curled up on the sofa, during that evening I began to ache (flu like aching) and developed a fever. On Tuesday morning I woke upto the whole of my genital area being covered in very sore bumps. People talk about \"blisters\", but at this stage they just appeared like bumps. I dragged myself to work but by midday I couldnt take it anymore- I was in so much pain! I phoned the doctors, as I was requesting to be seen by a female I couldnt get an appointment until the following day.

During my doctors visit on the Wednesday morning, the condition was mis-diagnosed as a localised infection. I was told that due to me being in a long-term faithful relationship it was highly unlikely I had got herpes - unless my boyfriend had been unfaithful recently - this went on to cause a huge argument that evening . I was told the infection was probably due to breaking the skin during shaving or something and I was prescribed a course of antibiotics. 36 hours after starting the antibiotics (it is Thursday afternoon by this point) I had seen no improvement, I was still in a great deal of pain and if anything it was getting worse. After a battle with the receptionist at my doctors surgery I managed to get an emergency appointment with a different doctor who immediatly diagnosed me with genital herpes. I was prescribed an anti-viral drug (Valaciclovir) for 7 days, painkillers (codeine) and told to sit in salt baths (which I have found very soothing!!). Due to me starting the anti-viral drugs 4 days after I developed symptoms, they appear to be taking sometime to work. Although I have seen a slight improvement I am by no means fixed yet.

My advise to anyone is that if you have ANY slight suspicions you maybe experiencing a gential herpes occurance, seek medical attention straight away!! If you feel you may have been misdiagnosed, insist on a second opinion or being swabbed. You must stand your ground, do not be afraid to challenge your doctor- they do make mistakes like the rest of us!!

3

dear guest

i am having the same condition that u r, i too believe that i caught it upon oral sex the previous sunday when my partner had a cold sore. my episode started on thurday when i woke up with blisters, by friday the pain was terrible, i had sore lumps in my groin, i went to A&E where i saw a gynacologist, she said i had to wait till monday to attend the sexual health clinic, she took urine sample, and swaps from the blisters and vagina and gave me dicolfan or something which is a painkiller that didnt work for me, the pain i cudnt move or walk, the headache, the fever, my vulva at that stage was beginnign to swell. on sunday i cudnt close my legs i had to walk to awkwardly to the car to get to the A&E again i saw another gynacologist who gave me antibiotics which did not help much. anyway went to the sexual health clinic, the consultant diagnosed it as possible genital herpes and gave me the same medicine she gave 'guest' i've only started yesterday and already i feel better. she saidi should use salt warm baths which are most soothing and the inflamation is considerably better. the pain still there and the awkward walk, let alone the disgusting look of my vulva with the inflamed skin and yellow secretions. as for painful urine i had to use a warm bath once and then take a good shower, or also try doing so while pouring warm water on ur vulva using a small jug.

i am still in pain, but hang in there ladies it will go in time and good care.

4

i have just come back from my amazing holiday from the dominican republic. out there i met the most amazing man ever and we desided not to have sex to show respect for each other .however this did not stop his friend takeing full advantage in the hotel tolets after i stagerd in drunk.i did not tell any one not the new man in my life my best friend or my mum i simply stumbled outside wiped away my tear and drank even more i woke up the next morning gutted and felt abused

but enoying the rest of my holiday falling more mad about the kind honest man i met not even mentioning the fact his mate unkown to me yet caused the most horable pain i have ever experianced in my life i feel dirty in pain and worthless the thaught of having any kind of sex agen scares me half to death i cnt sit down or get the tablets that are supost to help down my neck fast enough 5 tablests a day within 4 hr intervles i have never wish 4 hrs away so in my life dose it ever stop?

5

I've just been diagnosed with herpes too and I've been married 2 years and with him for nearly 4 years. I had the same experience when telling my husband about it- he was furious that I asked him if he'd been faithful cos I know I have! Then when researching this I could have had it for years and only just got an episode. I went to my docs with the most awful pain and couldn't deal with it- was crying 24/7 and couldn't stand, sit or lay down. No sleep didn't help. Doc done swabs and then told me I had herpes- blimey- i nearly died. It's a terrible stigma but having been to my local GU clinic my mind has been put at rest a bit. It's a virus in everyone and some are unlucky to catch it. Some people have it for years before they even realise and how do you tell who infected you??? I'm 43 now so it could be 1 of a few! lol

However, the clinic staff were absolutely brilliant. They took more swabs and a blood test............ also tried to give me an internal which hurt so much she actually stopped and didnt pressure me into anything cos of the pain. I'm going back Monday, so maybe they'll try again OUCH

The telling that you've got this infection is a shock to the system but I urge anyone not to research it too much with others experience and stigmas, but to talk to a professional-at a GU clinic where they can explain things to you. I accused my husband of all sorts but as the professional told me you can have it for years and then get an episode due to stress (which I've had alot of recently).

I know it's with you for life but it wont kill you and that's something to be grateful for in a way.

I've been able to explin it to my husband and we seem ok again. The professional also gave me a leaflet for him to read which also put his mind at rest.

Take care all and don't worry too much about it

xxx

6

Sorry to all those suffering...

I caught herpes about 10 years ago and it was so painful the first few times ....I had 4-5 outbreaks that 1st yr and felt dirty and horrible and low esp when I found out there was no cure sad

However I now rarely get an outbreak,maybe once every few years and although its uncomfortable for a few days its so much easier to live with....infact I never think about it and have 2 healthy children so please don't worry all those suffering it does get less and less frequent :wink:

7

I cannot empathise enough with those of you going through an initial episode of sores, it is highly painful and I found that peeing in the bath was the only way I could manage a trip to the loo along with a regular intake of paracetamol.

I contracted Herpes about 5 years ago and like so many other women, it arose from oral sex with a boyfriend who had never had a coldsore in his life. He was as shocked as I was and tested positive for Herpes. On further reading I discovered that a huge majority of the poulation have some type of Herpes by the time they reach older/adult ages. Although I know that probably doesn't console people experiencing it right now, it is useful to bear in mind that this is not a life threatening virus - a total pain for sure, but with time I have experienced less and less frequent episodes and NONE have been as horrendous as the first.

Talk to people you trust about this - you may find that a lot more people have some form of Herpes than you think. People get coldsores around their mouths the whole time - this is no different, it just happens that we get them in a really inconvenient place.

8

today i jst discovered i have herpes after being in sheer agony for 5 days, everything written above i can relate to, the pain is horriffic never felt anything like it in my life, i have jst started seein a new partner, who am gonna have to explain to wht i gt, after rackin my brains an readin a lot about this, he did say he was jst recoverin from a cold sore, so tht could prob explain why i have gt this, but tellin him will be diff story as i will prob get the blame an he will prob call me all the dirty slappers under the sun an tht will be end o tht, i will jst have to hope he the understandin kind o guy!

9

I have been suffering with all the above symptoms for 2 weeks now, I have seen 6 doctors who have taken urine samples, poked around, swabbed, examined internally and it took until the 6th one to actually diagnose me with herpes and prescribe me the right stuff. It has been complete and utter agony made worse by the fact that it has come from having been taken advantage of in a drunken state. It's only just hit me today that this will be with me forever like a constant reminder of that little prick but luckily the worst of the pain is over and I finally feel like it won't last forever, Im on the mend and trying to get my head around it but I'm scared about how it will affect my life and who I am.

10

My situation was similar to yours. We need to share what works and doesn't work. I guess the whole point of this forum. I am sharing my best and worst discoveries in hopes it will help and in hopes someone might write something I could find useful.

Good:

Sleep / Rest / Minimize Stress

Healthy Diet - no sugar, and not too much salt helps me

Exercise

Viradux-AU (a very good anti-herpetic crème - has stopped OB's altogether)

keeping positive

Bad:

Stress

acyclovir

Valtrex

Tons of other treatments out there that I have tried and not had much luck with if any at all!

Thanks for sharing all!

11

I just got diagnosed today with herpes. It was quite a blow but like others have said- its possible to have it for years before you ever have an outbreak. As a result- I have no idea who/where I got it from.

As far as the urinating goes, I have found that the best way for me to go with out intense!!!! pain (literally takes your breath away and makes it feel like you got punched in the stomach) is to lean way forward and almost lift a little bit off the toilet seat. It keeps the urine going forward rather than down towards the open sores. I put off going as much as I can but that almost makes it worse cause you have more coming out.

As far as other pain goes... I feel like im on fire down below all the time, woke me up this morning just throbbing. The doctor told me I could use some vaseline to protect the sores and make it feel a little better but that doesnt really help. I saw someone mention a salt bath...? is it regular salt, epsome salt or something else? I need to be able to work and function but right now its just not happening

12

Im so pleased to have found this!

After being in absolute agony for 2 days I went to ER where they confirmed I had genital herpes. My boyfriend had a cold sore on his lip and had gone down on me so I'm presuming that's how I got it. I have been on the meds (aciclovir) for 3 days now and I'm still in pain. I want to know when the blisters will heal? and do you get regular outbreaks since you were diagnosed?

13

Honestly girls I feel your pain.

So it's a saturday at the moment... I suspect I developed the actual physical herpes on the wednesday night - I had SEVERE unbearable itching around my vagina and anus whilst on my period (apparently it's common for the period to bring it on as periods affect your immune system). Since monday I'd had fever-like symptoms, sickness, flu-like symtoms (dizziness sensitive skin sensitive to light proper headachey) but no ACTUAL cold has emerged. My tonsils have been way up ever since, but they're always just waiting to infect me whenever something comes along.

So not only was I developing (self-diagnosed) herpes, I had to wear this AWFUL pad which stopped any airflow!!

Anyway, the next day I could get away with not wearing a pad. I had a look in the mirror at what was so itchy (I thought it may have been some sort of rash from the pad). I instantly knew, without a doubt what it was - red hard bumps which were painful to the touch and blister/spot-like. Me and my friends had comletely taken the p*** out of people with herpes over the years, so we kind of knew what it looked like and the symptoms already. Karma, yeah I know.

I'm waiting to go to the STI/STD clinic today with my boyfriend (who I suspect infected me with it) so I can get some antiviral drugs because the pain I'm in is absolutely unbearable. The toilet thing isnt THAT bad if you lift your legs up while you use it and push it all out quickly it's not too unbearable!

I found some old anaesthetic cream that's in the meds bag, and i slapped that allover the place to stop the itching, burning, chafing and general pain. It burned at first for a min but honestly is the best thing I can suggest as it feels almost completely numb now (although still itchy as hell).

I have a high pain threshold but this just completely knocked me out painwise, never had anything like it. I suffer with terrible periods and get tonsillitis reoccurences (and when they come its like WW3) and THIS definitely beat it. Good luck to you all. I just worry that because I'm only 20 this is going to be a lifelong problem and that it will never ever go away sad that's ALOT of years (god willing) to be living with this type of thing sad xxx

14

I am 54 and got herpes2 about 30 years ago.  I get it on the backside, not the genitals.  It is also excruciatingly painful at its worst, which lasts about one day.  I have gone for as long as several months, maybe up to a year without an episode, but it always comes back eventually.  I'll list here what helps me and what I need to avoid.

Avoid: 

Stress

Most nuts, cashews, walnuts etc

A lot of chocolate

Becoming too tired or run down

Oddly enough, I find if I masturbate (which I have kind of outgrown and happily have a very 'active' husbad) I am more likely to get an outbreak.

Hot sun - once in Mexico I had on a low bikini and got a bad burn and got *seven* sores where I was burned. OMG that was the worst.

Avoid foods that are high in L-arganine.

What helps:

An amino acid called L-lysine (read precautions... body builders use large doses which can cause problems). I take 1000mg up to 4x a day during an outbreak and 500 mg pretty much daily as a precaution.

Getting lots of sleep.

Eat foods high in L-lysine

Also herpes is a virus and viruses cannot live in heat.  If it is an area you can apply heat to, that can kill it before it gets established.  Because mine is on my backside, I take a jar with a small opening and fill it with pretty warm water.  Hot really, but be careful not to burn yourself.  I submerge the spot that is just breaking out (raised just a tiny bit, or just at the tingling hurting stage) until the water cools off a bit.  I repeat that 3-4 times one right after the other.  The last time, the bump was started and I could really feel it was coming on, so I did that and also made a paste of 3 of the L-lysine tablets and rubbed that on for the next couple of days.  The little bump went away.  I have had some success with the heat before, but if I am too stressed or run down, it just appears in a different spot... determined little bastard that it is!

I'd like to see a bit more research done on this heat technique.  

I'm hoping a cure can be found soon, but after 30 years, I'm not so sure, so for me it is a management thing.  I definitely conduct myself, what I eat especially, accordingly.  Good luck everyone... 

15

Hi anna, 

seems to me aciclovir does not help much. 

why you list it under the bad things, as they do harm or simply they did not relief your pain, discomfort either ? 

I suffer from almost constant itching...got infected with herpes five months ago and had the first outbreak after the primary Infection three weeks ago. 

Nonetheless the itching is almost always there... Thanks for any advice, as you know the constant feeking of discomfort isdestruktive  so any piece of advice is highly appreciated ! 

Best s. 

16

I can relate to pretty much everything you said. I dreaded using the bathroom because it felt like a thousand knives were cutting me. My doctor suggested getting a spray bottle and spraying water on my vagina as I peed. It really helped!

17

I am waiting for my results to come back in but today my doctor told me I possibly have genital herpes. I also have no idea how I got it. I spent a whole week with my boyfriend, we were oral on eachother & nothing ever came up . If we both went down on eachother wouldn't one of us gotten a sore on our mouths first ? I still don't believe that I have herpes. I arrived saturday afternoon to my home, and I got the sores Sunday night when I was already with my family. I am just 18 years old, I don't have many sexual partners & I have been with my boyfriend for two years. This is the most pain I have ever been in, I am so scared to pee that I don't even drink water or eat anything.

18

I found when I had my outbreak, actually my mom gave me this idea, she told me to you take a cup of warm water and stream it over your girly parts and pee stream, mainly your pee stream, and that it makes it way much easier to pee and much more pleasant.

19

I have found well during outbreaks of the most severe kind , using a cup of warm water to pour with your urine stream makes it a lot more pleasant to urinate . My mom gave me this idea and it worked out great .

20

You can actually have children? Omg thank the Lord.