i have autism and epiepsy and some other health problems im a normal weight but very unhealthy and fit.. i have no friends apart from one girl who doesnt live near me anymore she lives like 6 hours away so i never get to see her anymore.. i have no job no money... never had a job as of my terrible insomnia i honestly go nights without sleeping tried lots of different pills and drugs and they messed up my brain and made me worse like i went weeks and weeks with no sleep i thought i was going to die.. my brain still isn't back to normal after the drugs its all tight and werid... i am lonely.. i know im a total loser i have tried dating websites but its hard as anyone who was interested in me i wasn't interested in and anyone i liked didnt like me... i do have a boyfriend now who i love but its hard its alot older than me over 20years and everyone thinks im just settling and have no standards or would take anyway which isnt true i just connected with him but don't know what to do as my whole family has judged me because of it... i also have stuff wrong down there and unable to orgasm so that gets so down to as i don't know why i cant and feel broken... i have tried lots nothing works dont think i ever will... i know some people are worse of but being surrounded by who have so much more and people who care about them and love them and have friends... i get nervous around people to i hide it very well but still people seem to dislike me and i have no idea why im always polite and kind and genourous to people and try my best to be as nice as possible unless a reason not to me ... i also have problem with my eye sight.... and i went through a stage of living in a dump and hoarding on to junk because i just feel so lonely i put it in a place of people and hated when i had to chuck it all out as felt emotionally attached to it thats how wrecked i am.. i am actually qutie pretty which to me makes me feel worse rather than better because even that doesn't help me in anyway i just feel worthless
is anyone else having some of the problems i am having i know they're all abit random but all this stuff is getting me down..
well i don't tell them about the super personal stuff as i'm embarresed but they know about all the pains and my sleeping problems... they just seem to think its not that bad or its in my head which is differcult because its all very much real which is the problem so its hard to cope with it all.....
I have many of the things that you mentioned above especially at your age how much older now the only thing that helped me was a counselor that walk me through the process of loving myself you know if feels awful to have others judge you but it has a very tiny impact compared to when you dislike hate or judge yourself
So your best bet is to stay away from medication I'm ausburgers and sensitive to medication small l amount of a benzo is the only thing I can do for sleep yet you might want to try melatonin which you probably have whoops if you're in the UK you can't get that but anyhow what I want to get across to you is therapy and counseling is the way out and people with autism tend to bounce back and you have that ability to bounce back. I think you'll find is you age you will find hobbies and different delightful things that you can do besides engage with people which might not ever be something that brings you a tremendous amount to joy but then again no one says you have to make engaging with people a priority
Do what makes you most happy and joyful and forget the rest best wishes sweetie
Maybe all your issues are not as random as you might think? Autism defined in it's simplest form "is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by impaired social interaction, verbal and non-verbal communication, and restricted and repetitive behavior. impairments of the growth and development of the brain or central nervous system. A narrower use of the term refers to a disorder of brain function that affects emotion, learning ability, self-control and memory and that unfolds as the individual grows" vison impairment and sleep disorders are also linked to Autism
Yet identifying the causality to any type of dysfunction can be complicated, time consuming, and expensive often resulting in increased workloads and expenditure to generalist physicians who in the UK are often contracted to provide General or Personal Medical Services (GMS/PMS) and expend their budget on medical evulations and outpatient referrals to specialists.. a clear conflict of interest which may go towards explaining their dismissive & trival attidudes so many of us continue to encounter towards our health concerns?, Irrespective of your personal issues we all have our flaws, insecurities, obstacles, and challenges in life which we have to work towards overcoming and/or learn coping strategies.. The world wide web is a pool of information which can be explored and utilized (learn on-demand) for personal development.. Social media can be an effective way to increase your social interactions: remain in contact with old friends, arrange and make plans, or establish and develop new friendships.. Don't be self conscious around people or fear being judged as it often reveals more about their individuality: characteristics and personality then it does yours you just have to push yourself out of your comfort zone and have faith: trust and confidence in yourself that you're capable of growing
Have you ever achieved an orgasm by yourself or with a partner or is this something that is recently affecting you? I'm currently seeking medical attention towards my own sexual dysfunction of recent onset and felt no embarrassment as it's in a professional setting and drew blood today to assess my cholesterol and hormone levels..
Also your profile's bio talks about societal influences - We all have different individuality, ideologies and philosophy of how we interact with people and view the world and how we dream it can be.. you just have to find and discovery yourself and I find a really good way of inducing sleep is to read extensively
I totally agree with Swift. Also joining online Autism support groups is another step. Often they arrange outings and such as well so you can meet other poeple with autism in your area. You might not feel so alone. I have a special needs daughter and I have every intention as she gets older to encourage her to do this (she is only 9 at the moment).
i just feel worthless