Been on cit since Nov initially on 20mg but after xmas stress, debt & snow doc increased to 40mgs.
FELT FANTASTIC !!!
So what happened ? busy getting my life in order happy in general looking forward to going back to docs tomorrow to look at possibly going back to work then BANG the lowest i have been for years the only difference was i didnt cry, really wanted to as it does make me feel a whole load better. Thats when i thought what is the point? should i carry on?
Just felt so withdrawn worse than ever i couldnt even talk to my really supportive, wonderful partner & soul mate as i didnt actually know what it was.
Today i feel guilty, sad as my partner has gone to work feeling really tired as he was so worried about me, fed up with moaning at my gorgoeous daughter to tidy her room and gutted because again ive realised im not ready for work ( i miss everyone so much)
Sorry for posting a rant as i normally only post positive comments
I can relate to how you are feel, I left work in September last year started Sertraline, which helped. I have had a few bad episodes when I thought the pills werent working, I increased them for a week then lowered them, after i felt better.
Do you find you feel your worse around the time of you period? I do and I find this hard to deal with.
I started a new job 6 weeks ago, it helps I feel fine when I am work, Like you I have a soul mate for ahusband who has been my rock.
See you doctor and just explain, I know its hard for doctors to understand how you are feeling, I feel Like i am banging my head against a brick wall with them at times, But hang in there.. this little espisode of yours should pass.
The point is that you really will get better. You've been really positive and optimistic in the past and you will be again. It's another hill to get over and you're really lucky to have the support at home to do it. Just keep strong and, like all things, it will pass.
That really gave me a lift when you said that i normally am positve, didnt think anyone actually read my posts !!!!
Had a lovely weekend walking & generally being 'Me'
GP said i am nearly ready to go back to work, see just wants me to meet with the occupational health before i do, to discuss phased return, i just want to get back .
I AM SOOOOO GIDDY :D Cant wait to see all the kids ( i am a year 11 manager)
That's good to hear. And thank you. I don't get many downers now (third month on citalopram and a success story really), but if I do I tend not to post because it somehow prolongs it. What I'm inclined to do is abandon myself to the long dark tunnel and wait for the light to appear at the other end - which it always does. Wouldn't work for everyone but it's OK for me. I know I'll come out of the tunnel so I'm not afraid to go into it.
Enjoy the kids. They show you what things can be like. And use chemistry to get there - there's nothing wrong with doing it.
