Hi,
3 years ago my psychologist gave me the diagnose that I suffer from severe anxiety disorder and agoraphobia. I’ve tried so much to get better, but I struggle with myself almost constantly every day. I feel so tired of everything. Now my psychologist gave up on me and I’m waiting for a new one, but the waiting list is huge, so it can take up to 8 months.
I can’t function normally in my every day life. Because of my symptoms I’ve lost my social network, school, job and contact with my family is also low. I struggle with myself at home, but especially outdoors.
3 weeks ago I started taking walks 2 times a day without a skip, but things actually got worse. I feel horrible. I can’t really explain how I feel, but it’s like I’m in a constant bad trip with lots of anxiety. I feel stressed for even the smallest things. My emotions are not balanced at all. I feel a lot of pressure around my head. The list actually goes on and on. Nobody understands it including myself. I don’t feel like myself. I don’t feel grounded with this world anymore.
Because I’ve tried so much and things don’t get better I’m wondering if it may be physical. A while ago I did a basic blood test, but nothing came out. I don’t really have health anxiety, actually, if I had a real health problem it would bring me relief. I barely can’t handle things anymore. I’m not sure what I exactly have.
Before everything went so bad, I can think of a few triggers. 1. mental and physical domestic violence for 8 years when I was a kid 2. Faint at my school. 3. bad trip with weed and mushrooms.
Besides this I always been more anxious then the average person and very thoughtful.