Well, ladies... I just received a letter from my employer stating that they denied my FMLA and my health insurance will be terminated on March 4th. Additionally, if I do not return to work they are terminating my contract. In other news, my mother had a mini stroke a few days ago and is not doing well. I don't feel well enough to return to work. I work in a high stress environment where you always have to be "on." If I did go back, how would I be able to take off for all of my doctor's appointments as well as my mom's? Is it even safe for her to be home alone? How is this my life now? I was a normal working woman four months ago. I have nothing. I have been on unpaid status since December. I am single and broke and sad and I feel sick everyday. I am scared for the future. I don't know what to do. I just wish I never had a migraine aura and all the consequent visual disturbances. It truly ruined my life.
Staci, I am sorry...it is awful...all of it. What is the appeals process for FMLA? Also, can you apply for health insurance through your state? Medicaid? It is all so exhausting. All we do is pay and pay and we have to Fight, fight, fight for everything when we are in a bad way :-(
I don't know if there is an appeals process. I was assigned a lawyer through the union, but he has not proven his worth as of yet. I assume I could apply for charity care once the termination is complete. I just can't believe how different things are from just a few short months ago. My friends have husbands, children, houses, don't work, go on vacation, have seemingly endless money to burn, etc., etc., etc.. How did I get to 44 years old and have nothing to show for it. I know I am being ridiculously whiny, but I just wish I could have a bit of luck. It could be worse...be thankful for what you have...blah, blah, blah! My period is due in two day, can you tell?
hello why they denied the FMLA if your are sick? is suppost to protect you. i dont get this jobs i work for Human Services and the admin is just horrible . im so sorry about your mom is there a way she can go an assisting living or rehab ?
please dont feel bad you are not alone with this ! i have been bedridden now for 6 months with mono and sick with it for 11 months . i live alone no family around so going through meno and mono at the same time has been hell. i wonder too what the future holds and how the heck are we going to get through this ? can you go back to work and then hire a nurse ? so just know you are not alone in your struggles and something will turn up ....it always does..keep the faith !! we will get through this .
I know it's hard, but Lori is right. Keep the faith. God has amazed me over and over again during this trying trying time. I'm having more good days than bad lately. I'm sorry about your mother. I just gave in a laid at God's feet. I just couldn't worry anymore, it was making me worse. "Come to me all of you who are heavy laden and I will give you rest". Hang in there please.🤗❤
hi Stacy , is there a way you can re-up heal the FMLA I would do that and work with your lawyer don't give up on it.
Life really dish it out doesn't it I understand totally a lot of us ladies feel overwhelmed overburdened lonely excetera today has been an exceptionally low day for me I don't know how I can feel as tired as I do I almost feel an ominous presence like it's maybe something in the stars or something who knows I don't know how I can feel as tired as I do I almost feel an ominous presence like it's maybe something in the cosmos or something who knows
are you on unpaid status meaning you're not getting paid because you're home or how does this work ?
A few days ago I had a two-day migraine and it just comes on like that and sit there in my head then I'll have tooth pain and now I'm just super super low so I totally know what you're going through and so do the other ladies promise you A few days ago I had a two-day migraine and it just comes on like that and sits there in my head then I'll have tooth pain and now I'm just super super low so I totally know what you're going through and so do the other ladies promise you
And Juanita is Right sometimes we need to just pray and turn it over because that's really all there is support going your way and hugs and heartfelt energy
Xoxo
oh sweetie, i'm so sorry to read this. wish we could all get together and help you properly. sorry if this sounds corny, but in my experience, these bad life phases can allow for changes and unexpected things to happen for the better. maybe a different job where you dont constantly have to be "on"? keep with the lawyer and stand up for your rights if in anyway possible. sending you good vibes. gerry ps having a husband and children can sometimes actually be more stressful than being alone - not everything that shines is gold....
Eliaimee,
I don't know if you are in the US, but here employees are basically expendable. I had notes from several doctors, I had brain scans, I traveled to NYC to see a specialist. The initial episode happened at work and I was taken by ambulance to the hospital. I don't know how much more proof they need. My mother is not quite at the assisted living or rehab level, even if she were, we could never afford those options. Thank you for your kind reply.
Mauiblue,
I'm not sure if you are in the US. Here we are given a set number of days you can be sick in a year. For instance, mine is 10 days. If you exceed those 10 days, you don't get paid. Since I have been out of work for 4 months, I have long exhausted my sick days and I no longer receive a paycheck. Thank you for replying. It's true...many of us here are suffering from lows we have never experienced before peri/meno. I truly feel sorry for all of us.
Lori,
That sounds so awful...meno and mono!! You poor thing. I don't feel well enough to go back to work. Most of my symptoms are migraine and vision related. My job requires me to stand, use a computer, and be in front of students...all day long. I have to be "on." There is no phoning it in or working quietly at your desk. Oh, and the noise. Children are so loud!!! There is no way I could ever afford to hire a nurse. I have no income since I have not worked in four months. I am sorry for what you are going through!
Juanita,
Thank you for your kind words and encouragement.
gerrygerry,
I hope you are right. I could use a change for the better. I am afraid to tempt fate though. Prior to falling ill a few months ago, I wished for a different life. I certainly got one. I understand what you mean about the husband and kids. I just wonder about my life if anything were to happen to my mom. For instance, I was taken by ambulance to the hospital four months ago. I won't even have anyone to call. Or, if I was in car accident or had cancer. It would just be me. I think of all the things I do for my mom (schedule doctor's appointments, drive, financial support, etc.) . I helped her recover from cancer and am caring for her now. When I am older, it will just be me. I don't have any money and haven't been to work. What happens? Do I just become homeless? I just worry a lot about the present and the future. Thank you for the good vibes...I will happily take them!
Sorry you're feeling so low Maui. Hang on. It has to get better.🤗
It appears that when I talk into text on my phone I'm sending the message double oops! Yes thanks Juanita I do hang on that's pretty much what I do it's fine though I'm a survivor
I think a lot of my mood is also situational as I have some pretty heavy issues going on with my son I'm hoping you're doing okay at work and getting by. it sounds like you're getting better though . Xoxo
Hi Staci yes I am here in the US get my job is at a smaller scale and a medical clinic they wouldn't even offer FMLA in my wildest dreams. .There's no relief at my job so you basically can't take off ever and if you do your major guilt-tripped. there's no replacement. Have you been off for four months because of basically your symptoms? it's a scary time truly for all of us. I don't think a good majority of the population understands really what we go through. do you have children ? I'm praying everything eases out for you. Were here for you. Xoxo
mauiblue,
Yes. I was diagnosed with persistent migraine status. My vision was severely affected by a migraine aura. I have been under the care of several doctors and there is no cure. Although, there are some heavy duty medications, which have side effects. No, I don't have any children and am single.
Staci I am so sorry this is going on, it does seem to happen all at once. Is there any way your doctor can write a letter to your employer stating your condition. Or is there any way you can get some sort of subsidy from your government (disability). I understand every country is different. Some places allow a leave of absence to care for a loved on, it's called compassionate leave. You don't get a lot but enough to pay the bills. Is there anyway that you could start your own business. There are a lot of great self businesses, marketing ones, or something like dog walking or house cleaning. That way you can schedule around your appointments and reschedule if you are under the weather. Just some ideas. Is there any other family members that can help your mother as well? It should not be left to just one person. A lot of the times we take on more that we can handle and that gets us overwhelmed and stressed, making symptoms a lot worse.
I do agree that some of your mood may be caused by what's going on in your life. For instance, I was fine yesterday until I spoke with my sister about a family trip. It's a long story, but today my mood is not so great. You are a survivor and I'm glad you realize that about yourself. 🤗
Even little things like a conversation or a misunderstanding can really switch your brain. The situation I have going on with my son now it's pretty rough right now and I'm struggling between making some major decisions regarding where we live if he goes to stay with his dad Etc and he's completely changed he's 13 He is volatile and hostile and I feel like I'm being abused . My other son can't stand it he a stellar 16 year old who's trying to explain to me that this is not right. I could go on but I will save it for another day. it feels kind of it feels kind of like PTSD , unresolved issue on a daily basis creates a sort of depression in itself I think. let me know how your work is and how you are doing these days sounds like you are a lot more stable. I hope all is well spring is coming! Aloha Xo