Hi everyone, so last night i argued with my mom. Like i feel my mom never listen and never show her support to me. Whenever I’m trying to talk to her about my dreams, her response is not what i want. I mean i want her to support me that i can do it instead talking the worse about it and make me sad. Our relationship is not that close, we only talk about ordinary things such as have you eaten, what do you want to eat, how’s ur thesis goes. I love my mom and i know she loves me a lot but we never really talked about our feelings. We keep arguing when i tell story but she didn’t listen it instead advise me. So i just cried last nighy, i told her how much i really need a mom who always listen to me And support me, everytime i see my friends and their mom is so close i got jealous, whyyou always underestimate me whenever i tell you about my dreams, you don’t want to admit mistakes when you wrong, have you asked me about my dreams and what is my skill ? I just feel bad when i tell her those things, i just wanna know how is she feeling afterward? Am i wrong ? I just 😢
Hi there
it was sad to read your post but I felt I had to reply!
i am not a mum I’m 40 and mines 71. I have been fortunate that my mum has been there for me but we have had our moments.
it sounds like you really like all girls do just want your mum to be there and listen to you to hear your dreams.
i know you that when you spoke to her you argued and that’s not good for both of you.
Can I tell you what I did one night I wrote a letter to my mum put it in her bed.
She came to me an hour or so later and we talked not shout talk. For ages
maybe you could do this as it’s clearly hurting you.
may I ask your age ?
mums may not agree with what we thinks best for us but they re looking out for us in there own way. Tell your mum how she could help you, she may not have all the answers she is only human just like everyone. We get things wrong don’t handle things perhaps the way we should.
I really hope you can find a solution to this I am sure you mum doesn’t like arguing with you.
take care
vicky 🙂
Hi Charizz - I had a mother who despised me. She never even used my name - but doted on my twin brother. I spent decades wondering what was so wrong with me that my own mother would treat me like that. Went through hell trying to get an answer. The end result is that there was nothing wrong with me.She's the problem. the other discovery was that you cannot expect someone to give you what they don't have. Stop expecting her to. You will have to find another way to believe in yourself. My choice would be to go ahead with your dreams - never let anyone stand in your way. You will find that when you have achieved you can take all the credit. It will boost you like nothing else. Also, has your mother suffered any depression? She might be closed off because of something in her past that she just cannot get past. Don't blame yourself. You are only responsible for you.
Hi vicky, you are such a wise woman. I’m 23 and my mom 53, and both of us never been so close. Thankyou for telling me your story, and replied mine. Sending the love for you and your mom ❤️
Hi wayne, from the story you told me and I’m sure you’re a strong person. I admire your spirit and still get along ur life with your big hearts. My mom has suffered with depression because my dad had affair with another woman. Not only only one but a few women, i feel mad at my dad when i knew what he did to my mom. I love my mom a lot and somehow i want to protect and make her happy without feel any pain. But sometimes, I don’t get it when she mad at my dad but i am the one who blame. Sorry for my bad English because its not my native language.
Hiya charizz,
oh my days I don’t know about wise!, but I do know I’m older now and I have in the past put mum through hell really. Now she is older I just want our time here to be precious as she is a breast cancer survivor but it could have been so very different.
i hope you can keep the lines of communication between you and your mom after all we just have the one!!,
i really hope you get on better
take care
vicky xx
love to you and your mom too.
btw we still have our moments somtimes I snap at her and it’s just not fair I am gettiñg better now she I said so very gentle that I see an aging lady now not the lady running down the road after me!!!
Xxxxx xxx
Awww you’re the best :’). I’ll try make our relationship better. By this forum and your story i can learn a lot about how to fix relationship with my mom from you. I’ll try my best, and you are right at the end i only have one mom and she’s getting older not like it used to.. Thank you so much vicky, you help me a lot, i feel so much better cause of u.
I hope, i can keep in touch with you and Wishing your life filled with happiness and joy vicky. Your mom will be the happiest mom on earth for having you.
Sorry for my bad english because it is not my native language.
Have a nice day xxxx
Hiya I’ve private message you 🙂
Hi again Charizz - your English is wonderful, very well written. I was thinking maybe you are reminding your Mom of your Dad which why she can be difficult. It's unfair if that's the case, but it isn't your fault. Things will change as you get older, the bond will strengthen.