Hi Lara,
Have you been to your gynaecologist and had a diagnosis of LS? White patches are a pretty sure sign. You need to get the standard prescription and use it properly. Do watch Dr. Goldstein's presentation so you're up to speed on this horrible disorder that nobody talks about.
https://patient.info/forums/discuss/dr-goldstein-lecture-271556
Two things:
1. stress makes LS worse, so freaking out will only trigger a flare. You might look into various mindfulness practices.
2. if you're having intercourse even though it hurts, the friction and bodily fluids will make it worse. Wait till you get it calmed down.
Now, aside from the meds, which are for life, there's a lot you can do to keep LS calmed down. One thing you can do right away is cut way down on the most inflammation-causing food – sugar. Even piles of fruit. It's not an allergy, you can have a normal small amount. Just no candy bars or big, sweet desserts, ice cream cones, etc. This will make a difference quickly.
Have you stopped using soaps and smelly stuff on your undercarriage?
Are you wearing cotton underwear and loose pants?
Bathing with 1/3 cup of baking soda in the water is very calming and healing.
A diagnosis of LS and proper treatment can stave off disfiguring scarring and prevent cancer. The appearance of white patches is the least of our problems.
We all freaked out for awhile after diagnosis (or just figuring it out for ourselves on the internet) but joining this community and being able to talk about it and get helpful tips makes a world of difference. I've had LS for forty years, but was only diagnosed in 2013. I had two children naturally, lots of satisfying sex, and I'm not going to get squamous cell cancer of the vulva because I'm looking at my undercarriage every day with a shaving mirror, using the prescription properly and keeping it slathered with oily stuff to keep it from drying and cracking and to act as a barrier against irritating urine.
Hope this helps. Glad you found us.