I recently moved away off to another school...I left my previous school because some guy who disliked me and pretended to be my friend stole all my previous friends. So school started today and since the school im attending is litetally right next to my old school i get a feeling of longing whenever I look at my old school. I feel like getting revenge against the guy who stole my friends but...I know revenge isnt exactly a good thing. Im confused..like i got advice saying change could be good or bad dependibg how I see it but to me it feels like both..What should I do to get ovet this already?
Hi there. I understand and your feelings are natural. But you have a great power inside that will allow you to adapt to change, and this is just as well because life is all about change. Otherise it would be so boring and we would stagnate like still water! We must master change (not let it master us) and love it or we'll get left behind. It's an exciting adventure with new things, new people and new ideas all of which means you grow more. New thinking and new behaviours mean new living. Growth and contribution are the two main things that will truly fulfil us in life. Change comes to each one of us in its own unique way so that we can develop and become better, stronger and wiser. We need these qualities for all the good things that will be coming our way so that we can really enjoy them when they do. However, only you can activate your power to deal with the unique changes that come into your life for you.
It's good you were exposed to difficult personalities at your old school because it won't come as a shock later with some! People can be fickle. Often they are insecure and unaware of real life truths. We need to be big and strong enough, in heart, to forgive and let them grow in their own time.
Many older adults wish they had known things like this at your age. For some it can take a lifetime! It would have saved them loads of time and energy which they could have used to move on, forward and up. Your change seems to be a blessing in disguise, as if you've been given a head start compared to others. Believe me, much of the so-called 'big stuff' that happens in school feels so so irrelevant, even laughable, as an older adult.
Best of wishes.
Change is often difficult, particularly if it is enforced due to circumstances we cannot control. The truth is that real friends who will stand by us when the chips are down are a rarity in our lives. People have friends on Facebook but these are barely aquaintences. School friends, especially when we are young can often be fickle. We cannot own friends and people who are lured away by other aquaintences are in no respect friends. Often what upsets us in life is finding out that life is not as we believe it should be. In thgis regard we can be totally unreasonable. For example, expressing anger if you stub your toe on a brick. Why would we not expect that to hurt? As for seeking revenge, I worry for you. That is not emotionally healthy. I think that you would benefit from talking to a school counsellor to start with. Can you discuss your feelings with your parents or guardian? One thing is for sure, please do not look for advice on the internet, it is a dangerous place especially if you are emotionally vulnerable. There are many wicked people out there who obtain pleasure from harming other people.
I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but you will make friends at your new school....hopefully better than the ones you left behind.
The guy that stole your friends...he is just a bully, and no good will become of him.
Take care, and pop in to let us know how you are getting on in your new school. x