16 and have no friends. lonely.

Mental health
1

hi. im a sophomore in high school. im depressed as hell. 

i doubt i'll commit suicide bc it'll cause problems for other people. 

im miserable. 

i don't have any friends. yeah there's people from my old school that i talk to sometimes and i have streaks with people on snapchat but i don't have FRIENDS. 

my anxiety is too horrible for me to try and make friends. seriously, i don't think anyone understands. i can't even leave my house because the thought of being judged is so nauseating. 

my life is ruined. i can't make friends online, either, because im just that lame. 

if i haven't already made friends, what are the odds i'll ever have any? seriously. 

im broke and i don't think i'll get to go to college so i can't make friends there. 

again, anxiety, so if i ever do get a job it'll be something lowkey where once again i won't be able to make friends. 

i feel so lonely. 

i just wanna be normal. i want to do cliche teenager things. i want to be NORMAL.

i wanna drive down a highway listening to my favorite music with friends. i wanna go shopping and bowling and play laser tag. i wanna go to an arcade or roller blading or go to a drive-in movie. i wanna have someone to be goofy with. someone to tell secrets to. someone to care about who will care about me. 

instead i sit in my room scrolling through social media looking at what i can't have. 

and it hurts. 

has anyone else ever felt this way? 

or am i just completely helpless, hopeless, worthless, etc. …

2

Yes I feel like you too except I'm now 25. Just had my birthday this month. Anyways you're not alone. I feel like this too. Always have I stayed at home too now I regret my past. I know it must be hard for you. I never had any friends either I was too shy to talk to them. They always wanted to talk and I would just nod or say no. Avoided them they got the hint and left me alone. But I thought I wanted to be alone. I didn't now I know. It's my anxiety too it has made every aspect of my life su**. I wish I could be living life like everyone does but I stay at home. Have been at home for 7 years I have Agoraphobia. Please don't do the same thing I did. You will regret it. Push yourself to go out. Ask your mom or sis, bro to go with you. You can go out with your family. There's nothing wrong in that. Little by little try to engage in small talk with someone who you want to. I felt miserable when I was going to school. I hated it. I hated my anxiety and being near people. All the things you avoid will get worse. Like it happened to me. I lost track of time now it's been years since I haven't left my house sometimes I don't even go outside. You really would benefit from therapy. They would teach you ways to relax yourself and change the thoughts Anxiety causes. Try meditating, yoga, exercise, walking, breathing exercises seen on Youtube, you can also practice self imagery. Which is imagining you are at a relaxing place like the beach all by yourself. Eyes closed or open. I visualize this too and can even hear the waves. The mind is very powerfup. Good Luck💖Have you talked to the school counselor. I remember mine  somewhat helped me . I can't make friends online either I always write something I don't know how to explain myself and everyone hates me afterwards. I'm not very good with words in person or online. I'm only good in my head. Good Luck. You're not alone I'm sure there's more in your age range that feel like you too. Not every one is the same. Others your age are suffering from loneliness too. Don't lose hope. Try to talk to your sister or brothers friends. Engage in small talk with someone possibly while you're alone with them and have the opportunity. Take the risk and you feel happy you did it. Practice makes perfect. I remember I gained confidence in myself because I started talking to someone then others wanted to talk to me. I would reply full sentences. Which is alot since I wouldn't say anything before. You will get there. 👍

3

My bad for the long reply. I just started typing and got so into it.😬lol

4

I have a son your age. He is also lonely and has no friends. I blame the damn iPhones. My son is over weight and scared to grow up. He sees a therapist weekly. I suggest you do the same. The therapist really help with goals and social expansion ideas. Depression stinks, but you don't have to deal with it alone. Try school resources as well. They are required to help you by law if you are depressed. Things get better. Life is a rollercoaster with ups and downs, good days and bad. Remember there are people out there much worse off than you. Next time you see someone in a wheel chair or getting chemotherapy remember you are not that bad off. As you mature, you will learn to cope better. Life is not easy or kind and it will be what you make of your self. I hope this helps. You are not alone. See a therapist. 

5

Jade, bible is available in Social Media. Try reading a paragraph every day. I am sure those words will give you strength. Why don't you go see your parish priest ?

6

Hi Jade

Although my story is not the same as yours at fifteen I was similar and didn't have any friends outside of family cousins etc.

I started to play world of Warcraft and I joined a guild and ended up gaming with older people and speaking to them daily. This built up my confidence and I actually met some of these people.

As life went on I built myself up and met people through various happenings to now i have many friends, a loving GF and run my own business.

So my advice would be don't get to hung up.on right now as I am sure your life won't be like this forever.. find a starting point mine was gaming if you don't like that find. Hobby you like and join a local group etc.

7

Don't you feel like you are giving him advice to escape reality? A virtual world is fine but social skills are learned from social interactions in real time not on fantasy. The kid wants companionship a physical presence you can't get in a game world. He will get lost and remain isolated and will have no skills to deal with the realities of life. It's cold, hard and disappointing and we must all developed the skills to cope but not by escaping to virtual world. That's my opinion, take it or leave it. 

8

Jade, Im so sorry you are hurting so badly. I felt the same way as you when I was your age. It's a very lonely miserable feeling, I know!!! 

But I want you to know that it doesn't last forever!

I learned that keeping my feelings bottled up was the worst thing I could do. 

We need human interaction when we are suffering.  I did speak with a counselor and it felt like a 100 pound weight was lifted off me. Just to vent everything was great.

I highly suggest you talk to one. Yes, the school must help you connect with a counselor if you are depressed.  Take advantage of it.  They can help you manage your anxiety, 

Also I wanted to tell you that when you are a little older, you see things from a different perspective. I too had no friends and felt isolated and sad.

BUT...Now you have to trust me on this.... as I got past high school, The sadness of no friends went away. As you mature, you don't see things the same way as when you were younger.  Really, most kids go their separate ways after high school, even friends.  When you get into the world, get a job, you have way less pressure to find friends.  When you make friends  as an adult, it's way easier and more natural and no pressure  . In high school there's way more pressure  because kids that age place such importance on things like that. 

You would be surprised how many people on social media look so happy, but in reality, are not.   A lot of people put on an"air"  so others will think They have a great life.

 I know many people like that!!!

 The grass is not always greener on the other side .

You are not helpless or hopeless and definitely NOT worthless! 

You may not be aware of how much greatness you have inside you!

What a great friend you could be to someone.

 You have undiscovered talents , dreams, etc

This is where a counselor could help you.

You have your whole life ahead of you!  You just need some direction and guidance to get going.

High school is just a tiny fraction of your life and when you look back at it, you will see what I mean.  

I think kids would be lucky to have you as a friend!

Hang in there ....

Get the counseling 

Maybe get involved with something outside of school 

Listen to you tube audios for anxiety, and guided meditation for self esteem or self confidence.    They can really help!   Use earbuds for a better effect 

There are many to choose from. 

Be a fighter for yourself!  Be kind and gentle on yourself.  You are Unique person.

 try not to take life too seriously. Remember to laugh and smile. 

You are already a winner just by reaching out for help.

❤️❤️❤️😁

 

9

thank you, Jan.  that means a lot. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️!

10

thank you. i was actually considering doing something like that hahaha. have a great day, proud of you! 

11

it's no problem! lol. thank you a lot. ive actually just been enrolled in a virtual public school so i can't go see my old guidance counselor but once i figure out how to navigate the website im sure i can speak to the new counselor. good luck to you too!💖

12

Thanks. All the best of Luck💖