Advice for Depression

Mental health
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1

Recently, I moved out with my partner to his side of the country. While it’s all joyous and fun, I started to feel certain changes to my everyday depression: to give context my depression high-functioning but usually I neglect of my personal needs and wants and call it unnecessary. I’ve been diagnosed since I was 14. I’m 23 now. Before I moved out, I was getting really scared of people perusing me and it was making me delusional-ish (at least what my therapist would say) and my depression was very strong. But got better as the fabled day of me moving out got closer.

Anyways, It started with heavy limbs and aches and pains, I’ve laid in his bed before for 2 weeks at a time, and it was never painful, this was the first time I woke up with my whole body in pain. It was a lot more comfy to lay in bed than to get up. But my fear of letting my partner down scared me more so I get up. Everyday, same thing happens, I wake up achier and heavier than the day before. Even to this day.

Then they breakdowns during the night, from nightmares and stress. I would wake myself up from a nightmare and cry and cry for hours at least once every couple of nights. And I’ll go back to sleep. Wake up the next day, smiling and bright.

Then the exceptionally low moods and energy levels. I would only get up to eat and drink. And smile through it, and then go back to bed for hours and hours, call it a nap. Then I would wake up, and I do the same tango again. I would always say I’m just tired and that, I needed to rest. But I think he’s starting to assume that I have addison’s disease or something lol.

I have told him and ask him for help. But it’s not usually enough to get me hopeful. I’m worried that in a week’s time, where my 3rd year anniversary with him will be uneventful. And I’ll be at fault for it.

2

Heya, first if all give yourself some grace; depression isn’t something that can usually be controlled but managed to an extent. Not sure if this will help as everyone is different, but when I feel that way I do the bare minimum - wake up, shower or at least wash my face, brush teeth. Put on fresh clothes. From there everything else is extra, I have to show up for work but take plenty of breaks. I am trying to add working out into the mix as it does help a lot but it is a struggle actually getting there.

As for the anniversary, their your partner they will understand if you’re not feeling great and want something low key. So would definitely open up to them or to someone close to chat about it.

3

Dear Ellie

I am sorry that you are not getting any help or understanding. You need to register with a decent Doctor and get on some antidepressants. You also need therapy and an understanding boyfriend! He sounds as though the whole thing frightens him and perhaps it would be a good idea, if he is willing, to come along to a therapy session with you, so that he can understand what you are going through. The heaviness and pain in your body is your way of shutting down/ out from all the despair you are feeling. Perhaps you could consider CFS/Fibromylagia if the Dr doesn’t feel it is linked to your depression. Have you got any close friends that you could contact that might understand and support you? Don’t let this carry on, because trying to mask your feelings will only make you feel worse. I shall be thinking of you. Rosemary xx