I have recently recognised I have a drinking problem. Well I've known for a long time but beginning to address it now. I depend on alcohol to relax and to elevate withdrawal symptoms. I have made an appointment with a counselling service for 2 weeks time. I feel a let down as a mother and a wife. I feel anxious all the time and have started anti depressants. Guess I'm looking for moral support from this site!
Thanks
Hi, I am in a very similar position to you. The difference being that I have been on ante depressants for years now and didn't drink before (very rarely). I have come to the conclusion recently that it is the particular type of tablets (serotonin linked) that have actually caused my desire for alcohol, which have now turned into cravings.
I am going to see my GP (new GP, new surgery, new area) and don't know what he will think but I am now convinced!
I have an assessment appointment for tonight re depression and have had an assessment appointment for Recovery to address the alcohol. All very early days but a step in the right direction.
I am sharing this with you as I know how much we 'beat ourselves up!'. I hope that I will begin to make progress and can then encourage you too.
In the meantime give the antedepressants time to work and stabilise and keep an eye on your alcohol intake/cravings to see if they get worse. I wish I had had this advice myself much earlier as I wasn't even a drinker!
Take care
Hi Chloe. Please don't feel a let down. We all do what we can to get through. Anxiety is awful and takes over our lives 
Well done for getting support. And don't beat yourself up
I have similar problems and have managed to taper the alcohol over about six months but it's been so hard and had lots of blips but I hope I can keep it up.
take care x
You are not a 'let down' Chloe. You are suffering from a medical disorder which makes your body react differently to alcohol. There are solutions and people here will tell you what they have found works. My suggestion would be to do some reading about The Sinclair Method to see if it is something you feel could help you. This is a good place to start:
https://patient.info/health/sinclair-method-for-alcohol-use-disorder
Hi😊 first step is hard recognising you have a problem.
You will definitely get support from this forum, you are soooo not alone.
I've been sober for 8 years with a few blips in between.
I thought I was a let down as a mum and wife but they lonely want to see you well again.
You have to change your lifestyle, keep busy, make to do lists for each day of the week. Take your mind off drinking. Time them off as you do them, I found this helped me😉
Good luck and keep going, it is so worth it xx
You are in the right place Chloe, I know how scary it feel when you know that you have to do something about your drinking. A life without it seems equally as terrifying. Take baby steps and set yourself achievable goals. You have not let anyone down, you just hit a hurdle and now you are trying to get over it, you should be proud of this if nothing else. You will eventually learn how to relax without alcohol, and re wire your body to get pleasuer and coping skills that are more effective. Good Luck! You can do it. 
I understand how you feel. Good for you on getting help and also joining this forum. The people here are very supportive and have lots of good suggestions to help you.
Smile☺
Alcohol plays a big role in anxiety.
I am always hesitant to take meds when there is alcohol in my system.
I have been given new meds as well...but haven't taken them yet.
Counseling will help but wanting to stop..having the strength to get thru those anxiety moments (and not drink) can only come from within.
It IS difficult...especially when you know after a couple sips the relaxation will hit.
But after that the anxiety comes quickly....I do understand.
Welcome to the board. It is nice to have people to chat with that understand.
Hi Missy, I have seen your very helpful insights before. Your advice above is so true. I know you were responding to Chloe and not me but I am sure you can help me too! I am sitting here awaiting an assessment in less than an hour and am so nervous. I am so prepared to be open and honest but unlike many of this forum I was a non drinker until the ante depressant meds. You may have read my former comments. Ok so now I may be an alcoholic. But equally scared of coping without the ante depressant meds! X
Hi sharon..I am just seeing your response...I"m sorry about that .
Don't be scared of antidepressents because if you ARE..you can stop them...you won't be addicted to them...I usually give them a few days..
If they make me feel sick...I (antidepressents)...I stop and talk to my Dr. right away..you only want something that will make you feel "better".
I can usually tell that antidpressents bother me very quickly.
I don't know what assesment you were waiting for? Alcohol?
If so..I'm sorry that you struggle from alcohol too..
But antidepressents CAN help...
But if they make you worse..than don 't put up with that..just to comply.
I always tell my DRs when something doesnt' work and i have never been let down for being honest.
You are #1...you have to do what works for you...and you really have to be honest to get the best help.
How did it go?
Thank you to everyone who has posted support. Today is very bad, anxiety is sky high very shaky etc. I hope this hurdle I can conquer but feels impossible at the moment
Chloe, you'll get it under control because you want to. That's a good part of the battle right there. Heed PaulJTurner's advice. I used the method in that link and it worked out well for me. There are medications that can help you cut down or quit drinking and they have a much higher success rate than the traditional approach. Take some time to learn about Selincro, Naltrexone and Campral and how they work.
Has your drinking changed at all since you started the antidepresants?
Paul I was wondering if you have ever heard of someone using librium and gabapentine for detoxing. Just wondering if anyone had.
Yes, it can be but it is rare that a sufficient dose of Librium is not enough on its own.
Thanks. I'm just afraid that it is and I won't be able to sleep. I wouldn't take it during the day. Just before bed.
Normally, a drug like Zopiclone would be considered before Gabapentin to help you sleep.
Thanks paul. Just trying to work with what I have. I have one pill left of librium and I have to make it through the whole day and night then go to work tomorrow. Just hoping I equal out for the night. Thanks for responding
Thanks for your response, your words make a lot of sense. I am imagining how I will be when I've gotten off drink and am trying to self help by lots of reading. Keeping busy is hard at times because I won't to either sleep or drink! When I have a good day it usually follows with a bad for some reason. I have doctors app tomorrow so feeling apprehensive about that but I know it's a step forward 😃
How did your assessment for depression go? My appointment is tomorrow so feeling anxious, however like you said all steps in the right direction x
Thanks for your reply. It's easier said than done to not beat yourself up! That part I'm finding hard. Well done for the last 6 months. I'm still drinking every day but have stopped during the day. I'm hoping to cut down further and am undecided yet as to whether I need to stop completely or regain a healthier relationship will alcohol x