i want to tell you all about things that happen to me
the fear i have been trough the internet searching i have went through again and again every time i realize another effects came up..
i started with carbimazole from 15 and change it to camazole a year ago and i am 24 years old
i never really shared anything about what i went through my family wasn't really that well of and i can't let them waste their money other than blood test every six month and my med..
i found out was sick when my mom notice my neck seem like something is sticking out
not that visible but it was there
when i start i have this feeling like i want to throw up, with stomachache
my body start to swell with my right eye bulging out
my hands tremble
and my heart is beating like i run for miles and miles
and i fainted a lot when i am tired..
or when i was to sad or to angry i fainted
so my doctor suggest me to stop working out and give me med (i have forgotten the name for i didn't take it anymore) something p...... whatever..
afterward i my family did try other alternative when they found me throwing up when i don't even take my med properly at that time..
so we took another way and went to find chinese med it taste suck so much that at the time i can only said it didn't work that well with me months past and another blood test show my t4 t3 tsh is all still not normal..
so i got back with carbimazole
yes my t4 t3 tsh get normal after a year or more and yet after stopping all those med it got worse again
some of my families suggest to take surgery..
but because my father is hyper thyroid we can't take the risk
and there is also the possibility of not being able to bear child and ect..
so in the end i took the med even until now..
but
the negative effect of the med start to show up more and more after years
the pain in the stomach i got use to it
the weight gain at first i can make it goes back down but not anymore
the headache feel normal to me
the blurry eyes i pretend nothing happen
the dental problem i thought nothing of it
the aching body like my hand is going to fall off
or when i walk and i suddenly on my knees
or the hair lost so bad i fear being bald
or the mood swing i have
or the feeling of fainting and want to throw up with massive tremble and chill after a bit of exercise
or the trembling hand i ignore
the crazy heart beat i don't want to care about
and keep carry on pretending nothing happen
i want to keep pretend even right now
that i am writing this..
i will return to pretend everything is alright again..
but i want to tell you all i think it is not worth it eating the med for years ..
i regret not having that surgery
but now even having a surgery
i fear what else that will came out later to even do it
maybe some of you went through what i've been through but i think i have enough .. ^^
i hope non of you went through this
even right now i am crying and laughing and get angry and sad as i write as my mood goes up and down..
i don't even realize since when but i start to get numb a lot my body i mean.. at least i think it is