Ok so I'm perfectly normal when I'm alone or around people I trust. When I'm not around people I trust my attitude is either extreemly nervous to the point of not talking or extreemly nervous to the point of talking too much. Don't get me wrong, I have my good days too. And there are some people I can connect with that don't make me feel that way. But I'm always asking myself, should I think this way, should I act this way, am I crazy, is this the logical decision or is this an emotional decision? My voice changes depending on how nervous or how confident I am. I try to keep it level I do but I can't most times. My heart is almost always jumpy. I can't stand crowds. But I can go up to someone who looks lonely and say whats wrong or whats up and be just fine. I've been trying more and more to get out and do things I've secluded myself off for a little more than a year. And I've been talking more recently than I have in a long time. A lot of it is forced, some of it is easy depends on the person. I feel like I'm changing though inside. Is there something wrong with me like bipolar or is this just how anxiety feels?
No youre not crazy.
I had this worry when my anxiety increased. Googling bipolar wont solve your problems but it doesnt sound t me like you have bi-polar. Youd need extreme mood changes, extreme behaviour. I think this sounds more like social anxiety. Have a look at metacognitive therapy for anxiety and depression its a really helpful look at why some people worry and others worry about their worry. Do crazy people worry about being crazy? not to my knowledge. Theyre 'crazy' because they dont realise it is not normal what they are doing.
You are just being hypervigilant/aware of your own behaviour and have an 'insight'
x
Hi Nutcase, love the name, your far from crazy , everyone has these feelings , its a matter of overcoming them and not letting fear destroy you, remember the people out there are usually just as scared as you and in the end what do you reallyhave to fear ? Nothing enjoy life its real short
I know exactly where you're coming from. When I am really anxious it affects my voice. I know what I want to say, but I can't physically get my words out. Sometimes I slurr my words and sound like I'm drunk when im not. I am a binge drinker so when I speak sometimes without alcohol people just think I've been drinking. I ended up buying a breath test thing just to prove to my GP I'd not been drinking. Family and close friends know by my voice when I am anxious. I even lost a job years ago as my boss thought I'd been drinking when I hadnt. See you're gp and explain how you feel. Believe you me, the longer it goes on the more insular you will become. Even if you have got bi polar, medication can control it. Good luck.