Anxiety of medications

I have bipolar disorder and severe anxiety and they keep playing as a test dummy with all these medications. I have had terrible reactions to so many meds that I'm truly afraid to take all these chemicals... I can't seem to overcome this fear

As awful as this is going to sound its hard to treat people with bipolar because they dont usually follow the protocols and tend to stop meds on their own. I dont know why but that seems to be how it is. Also you are in a heightened state of fight or flight always seeking danger so yes meds will fall into that category its part of the disorder. They have side effects, all meds do. From what it appears 5-6 weeks later the body adjusts to it, alters your hormones and chemical reactions to calm the triggering of the fight or flight.

**how about this to help. Theres a blood test cyp450 gene testing. It shows which meds metabolize best in your body as its your blood. Then look at the results and it will show which will work best in your body for you. This should be given to anyone and everyone before dispensing but the world is cheap so it isnt. They do similiar testing for cancer patients rather then giving whatever.Rather then being a test dummy as you put it. And i dont really disagree with you at all. These meds arent candy. Half the time they work and they are a slow slow wean to get off of. So id say get that test at least then you know you have a good working chance at it going smoothly. 

Truth is this is your body, your life and your choice. But when you ask for help weigh the options.

I have gone through this trying different meds getting nowhere and sometimes worse. I am interested in the cyp450 gene testing.

can you tell me where to seek this?  I am sure it is the way forwatd with this illness.

I actually talked to my Prescriber yesterday about this same test. She said it only tells them what medications are compatible with kidneys not out brains😣

Oh dear thats a pity but thanks for letting me know, i might want a test for kidneys one day.

Meanwhile we are left to run the gamut of all these meds being tried out on us to see if we can find the right one, its really giving me problems and i just wish they could find something suitable.

Physchiatrists. Good ones know about it. Oncologists know about it. Major large clinics know about it.  Any updated medical professional knows about it but might have the knowledge for the testing lab pending where you live.  Google it and it can direct you better.

it tells you what medications you properly metabolize which is a big deal. Some metabolize too slow and get horrid side effects cause the build up is too intense. Some so fast the meds dont work and they are extreme hugh levels to have any effect. So yes it is very useful. In terms of it "healing" you there would be test for that as it is not an illness per say but a medicine to regulate your stress hormones. That is an internal thing based on you.  These oills are not like antibiotics. But this test is used for a match in terms that it would properly breakdown as it is intended too. Otherwise understand this is a brain thought issue that requires you to also seek theraoy and learn self calming tools. But a lot have issues just even trying to use them due to side effects and their own metabolism so the chances increase of them working at all.