i have just been put back on 10mg of citalopram and i am now on day 15 and the side effects are unbearable! i do remember it been pretty dreadful the last time too as i kept a journal of the experience but this time round i actually feel like im losing my mind, anxiety is so bad it is impossible for me to keep still, my heart thuds really hard, not racing as on Propanalol for that, i wake up with a feeling of dread and doom and see no end to it, the only way i can describe it is i feel like im losing my sanity as i feel petrified every minute of every day, just reaching out for any advice or help ive come this far dont wanna stop but its getting too much, 1st ever time posting on any forum, thanks
hello I no how u feel I'm going through this as we speak absolutely horrendous. how long have you been on new dose? xx
hi i am on day 15 today its really is horrendous doctor suggested coming off them however ive come this far and hoping things start to settle ! how about you and sorry to hear you are experiencing the same thing, you always feel like surely this isnt normal and no one else could feel this bad!
1 Like
Hi Nicola,I sympathize with you as I've been there many times over the years.Starting the medication only to find that your anxiety starts going through the roof,feel like you're losing your mind and unable to control the crazy symptoms that come with it all. As You're only on day 15 you will be in the acute phase when the medication is making things much worse. Unfortunately,as you know from previously, antidepressants will increase your anxiety and this is when people stop taking them because they can't handle it. I have never heard of Propanalol until recently,sometimes people are prescribed something calming to get them through this phase because it is so hard. You are on the lowest dose but even that can have an extreme effect on your anxiety as you well know. The only thing is to push through it knowing things will improve eventually,but it is a long,hard road to recovery. I've been on my current dosage for 10 weeks and still things haven't settled properly, you're not on your own. Keep taking the medication and look towards a brighter future. Take care.
hi Ian thanks so much for your response it does help when you read on here that we are not alone! the feelings i am experiencing are just awful and like you said it feels like you are going insane, problem is i cannot sleep at all probably getting something like 1hour a night then waking up in blind panic from sleep with an awful doom feeling and racing heart! ive lost 11/2 stone in like 15 days as i cannot eat either, but like you said i dont want to get this far and give up just need the side effect s to go away now its exhausting....hope you feel better soon and take care always around if you need a chat x
That's quite an extreme response to the medication,so I'm assuming you must have been pretty bad before you even started, because 10mg is a very low dose of an antidepressant. I was in a very bad way 2 half yrs ago when I went on 10mg Citalopram and was ill for 3 months but felt less depressed when I went on 20mg. Hard to know what to do for the best with these medications. Wether to go straight to 20 or wait to see how it goes on 10 and then increase later.If you're only sleeping for an hour and not eating and losing weight like that,it is concerning. Are you on your own because you shouldn't be on your own really at the beginning of treatment. You should have support from family or friends if possible to help you through the beginning because it is so hard. I'm very much improved thank you,but you sound particularly ill at the moment so don't hesitate to message,reply or post again.
1 Like
hi nicola i went through the same as you back in july i started on 10mg and was literally 3 weeks of hell with every side effect going. sweating, no appretite, very upset tummy, my whole body felt shaky and on full charge if that makes sense. i could hardly sleep and would wake up in panic and with the worst dread. it was horrific. the worst part was the increased anxiety and intrusive thoughts they were horrific and scary. after around 4 weeks i had some good days then went through a blip went all the way back to the way i felt at the start. moved to 15mg i was scared of side effects but they were not as bad. again eventually i had a couple of good weeks but again came a blip and felt back to the start. i have finally moved to 20 and have felt a bit better the last week and i hoping now i am on a proper dose i will improve. its been the hardest worst time of my life and just want you to know your not alone and hear any time to chat as i know how lonely it is. this forum has been amazing and on bad days i have sat just reading all the chats and success stories hoping itll be me one day! hang in there its so tough. leigh xx
hi ian i lost my mum last year pretty suddenly which kind of set my anxiety off on another level i was put on 10mg citalopram and i remember feeling pretty much the same then only thing is im sure the depression side of it wasnt as bad as now and maybe this is what i cannot handle the horrible thoughts and feelings of dread i did go up to 20 mg and it did eventually make me better, im not alone i have my hubby who has been amazing although its hard for him too i also have a large family the only thing i struggle with is the lack of help from doctors, etc its like you are given these drugs and just made to get on with it which is so scary! its now 5am and i had more sleep to tonight which i am sure will help. so happy you are getting there and same always here xx nikki
hi leigh thanks for your reply i 100% agree if it wasnt for these forums i really dont know how i would cope as you are just left to get on with it and i have never felt so vulnerable and scared, even though i have a big family and an amazing hubby i have never felt so alone as its hard to explain how i feel and to them i must just look insane as i am alwqys wanting to go to A&E or ring the crisis team but i literally cannot take the feelings, so happy you are getting there and i remember last year i was on them the dread feeling went away after around day 10 seems to be taking longer this time around doctor advised me to come off them but i scared to try something else to maybe go through all this again....always here too if ever need anything..nikki x
Hi Nicola. Very sorry to hear that you lost your mother,that is a life changing experience. It's normal to go through the process of grief and that process is unique for everybody. Some people can come to terms with things quicker than others and some people can cope better than others,we are all different. You say you have a crises team,not familiar with that,but have you had grief counseling? As for Dr.s I understand completely. It's not their fault completely because they have limited time to see you,and being general practitioners they are not trained in mental health and can only offer you a prescription. Mental health services in this country are woefully inadequate and it's sad we have to rely on these sites for understanding. I've experienced this for many many years,even before the internet when there were only books to read! At least you do have support and you're not completely on your own. If things are too personal to talk about don't hesitate to message me,take care.
hi Ian thanks so much for your messages really helps as like you said mental health services are so bad, it is these forums that have helped me so much as Drs dont really know much about the side effects, as mine said yesterday she hasnt heard of any of my side effects been that severe, i have read so many stories on here with the same side effects as me so goes to show they dont know much about them! i do believe this is all grief related never really lost anyone before so i guess this is how i am dealing with it! i am seeing a councillor privately as couldnt wait for the services far too long! its great to talk to others who are/have been through the same, so your responses are much appreciated xx
hi cheryl how are you feeling now?
Hi Nicola,never found Dr.s to be of much help other than to provide a prescription, that's another story. What I have found to be vital in recovery though,other than the medication,is knowledge. Knowledge in 3 parts. 1. Why it happened 2. What is happening to you and lastly how to recover. The reason it's happened is prolonged and intense stress caused by the grief of your mother passing in a pandemic and other things maybe on top. This leads to what is happening to you. The prolonged stress starts to affect the chemical in your brain, Serotonin. Serotonin has many functions through the body and in the brain,some of them being sleep and mood and well being. When this chemical starts depleting in your brain,sleep and mood starts to deteriorate and if the stress carries on even further can lead to what they used to call a nervous breakdown. That's like using a car with no oil in the engine,the engine blows up and you can't use the car any more.! It's the brain protecting itself against any further damage. Also,your brain function starts to get confused and your nervous system becomes hyper sensitised. It's like a computer with a virus sending out the wrong messages to the network controlling everything. This is when thoughts become confused, negative,dark and intrusive. Your memory is not the same,you have low moods,become emotional and no patience etc etc. Because your nerves are sensitive and getting the wrong messages around your body,you get weird sensations like internal buzzing,muscle twitching and tics, headaches, hearing and sight can be affected,the list is endless. Then with all this going on,you get health anxiety,am I having a heart attack,am I going mad,have I got Parkinson's, multiple sclerosis,will I recover,that goes on and on. Your thinking becomes an endless list of What ifs making your feeling like you're going insane. Then with all this going on in your head,you take a medicine after 10 minutes talking to a Dr. which is actually going to make you worse!!! This is in my mind is the hardest thing to take, and there's nothing you can do about it. The fact is, is that the antidepressant in time,will aid recovery by raising those depleted serotonin levels and it is going to take time. The road to becoming ill is long and the road to recovery is just as long,maybe longer unfortunately,but,as they say a very long journey starts with a couple of steps. With the knowledge of why these things are happening,you can try and accept all the weird thoughts and sensations eventually and know that in time you will improve and get better. Take care.
1 Like
thanks Ian i find it comforting and very informative and i appreciate you taking the time to reply....im sure i will have more questions ..take care ..Nikki
hi nikki how are you today? are you feeling any better? Ian you have described perfectly what has been happening to me with internal buzzing i have never been able to explain it properly but inside feels electric. i have had quite a good week but today i can feel the anxiety building up again so disheartening after a better week. also think hormones do not help ! leigh
Yes,it is electric. Your nervous system is electrical impulses sent throughout the body controlling all your bodily functions,such as moving your muscles when you want to move. The feeling is like an electrical transformer buzzing with electricity. It is the result of the nervous system being sensitised from stress over a long time as I explained. When you remove stress and recover,so will the nervous system. It's what people used to call bad nerves or say I'm a nervous wreck. I've experienced the buzzing myself,ironic really as I am an electrician.😄
hi Leigh unfortunately not, day 19 today and i can honestly say i feel like it is getting worse, the anxiety is unbearable i can be just sat there maybe feeling not too bad and then this feeling comes over my body so hard to describe, its like butterflies/fear and my legs feel like they are gone cold and also my arms almost like a burning sensation i get weird sensations in my bead still cant eat or sleep, maybe a few hours a night then wake up in a panic state with a racing heart , i really want to carry on but i think it maybe time to stop them now as nothing seems to be letting up! how are you? hope you are feeling better xx Nikki
Hi Ian had the worst day/night i am thinking of stopping these now as the side effects are killing me seems no let up to them my whole body is just constantly charged to the point i can even function properly, feels like its burning from the inside out and also the eating and sleeping is non existent, the waking up in a panic with your heart racing is awful you just constantly think you are going to die, i dont want to stop but something is telling me this just isnt right! did you experience any of these feelings at all? Nikki xx
Sorry to hear that. Are you still taking that Propranolol? I have no experience myself of that drug,never heard of it before. Go to the posts on it on this site, doesn't sound very positive to me,though everyone always post negatives only. I only have experience of taking Citalopram by itself,when you mix two drugs together it's hard to know what will happen. From what I read quickly about it, it's supposed to slow your heart down,so it doesn't sound like it's working to me . I would look into that drug first and see if it's beneficial to keep taking that. Maybe speak to your Dr. about it. I haven't experienced the hot/cold sensation,but I know lots of people have on the other site I'm on for Fluvoxamine. Whatever you experience, remember what I said that it's just your nervous system acting weird and nothing harmful,only frightening. Sleep is particularly stressful because really weird things happen again,weird dreams etc and in the silence of night with no distractions you become acutely aware of your heart,thoughts etc. My heart was thumping for ages earlier this year. Took ages on this med for it to calm down. Everyone gets frightened from this horrible condition but everyone on here including me knows what it's like. Look into the Propranolol first before stopping Citalopram. Keep in touch.
hi nikki are you taking propanalol? i meant to say at the start i had them with the citalopram and had to stop them and felt better when i did as the two together just didnt mix well for me at all. i have had a good couple of weeks but yesterday and today feeling awful again :-( leigh x