not been on for a while as I've started back at school. Only a phased return but finding it really hard to get back into the swing of things. I am so out of touch and don't feel as if I belong there anymore. I've been told to observe and have been given bit jobs to do but nothing like my normal stuff. I came home tonight in tears, am I just being over sensitive or has anyone else experienced the same and did it get better? My husband doesn't understand and looks bewildered when I try and explain why I am so stressed and sad. All I need is advice and support from you guys to get me through, or a good lawyer
thank you all in advance , hope my hippiesfriends are gaining strength and seeing progress.
I have a lot of responsibilities on the non teaching side. Transport, housekeeping, health & safety etc. I just get the feeling they don't want me anymore as various people are now going my job.
It's taken me four months to get back, I drive 2.3 hours to get there an back to work, so a phased return 9.30 - 4.00 ends up being 8.15 leave home, arrive back home 5.15/20 is a long day
I had hip replacement in Feb this year. Had 10 weeks off work. I'm a manager in retail. I felt exactly the same as you when I went back. I struggled to fit back in with the rest of the management team, and felt like they hadn't wanted or need me back. It was if they had been better without me. It does get better eventually, and your maybe been oversensitive. Looking back now I think I was. The weeks will soon pass and you will soon get back to normal and wonder why you ever felt like this. Big hugs and take care xx
I have just gone back to work too. It was meant to be a phased return but they want me to work four days. I tried it last week due to it being half term as I also work in a school but I found it very difficult. The pain I had before the op returned. My wound has also been hurting. I'm not liking this at all as feel like they just want me back and don't really care about my recovery
Sorry to moan but I'm finding it hard. All the best to you. Take care
I'm so sorry. Teaching is such a hard, hard profession. Perhaps they are trying to make it easier for you. Try and be kind to yourself. I'm 64 so beyond working age, but I can hardly imagine the difficulties of getting back to teaching. Wishing you good vibes!
After reading your reply I also felt like this. Like I've missed a lot and everyone else now seems to be going with the flow and I feel left out. I didn't realise this what it was. Everyone came back to work today after half term but there seems to be groups already formed not sure if I'm overreacting. I work in the office at the school it's a busy job have exams starting tomorrow that I'm having to organise but seem out of touch.
fthe responses show that you are not alone in this --- 4 months is a long time -
life went on while you were dealing with major surgery and healing ... you changed, you know - nobody knows what you had to go through ... did any of your co-workers come and visit you or did you have any other contact ?
be honest about your feelings - maybe talk to your manager or a counselor - (Not sure how that is called) -
How long are you employed at this school?
Keep taking deep breath- it will be okay, darling ... take one day at a time -
Hi Kate.We are at such stresssful times.I read that workers productivity is up 20 % and raises percentage is quite low.Its really a difficult time in c corporate America.Chin up,
Oh yes - I was all at sea when I returned to work. I work in a busy IT department, and I was very much the 'old hand' who knew all the "in's and out's" of the systems. Following my return I was totally lost, in fact I told them to treat me as 'the new boy'. My memory was useless, and I had totally lost my technical 'edge', I had the concentration span of a goldfish and had to keep writing things down to remind myself just how things worked. It took me about 6 months to get back into the swing of things properly.
I was lucky that I have a super employer, and was given a 'phased return' starting with 2 days per week for 3 hours maximum per day. I built up to full time in about a month. I was also given extra physio totally free of charge .
Your many responses made me cry,thank you so very much for your wise words, ongoing support, hugs, love and kisses (bless you Renee) and reminding me that I am not alone.
We are all a fantastic network of people who, never having met, have an afinety with one another's pain, fears and anx.
I am so very grateful to you all, I will try and weep less, be less sensitive, try and be thoughtful where my poor husbands concerned and carry on my recovery in the knowledge that I have wonderful friends in all of you.
Recovering from the replacement is complicated by the drugs you were given for anesthesia during surgery and the narcotics taken after surgery. All of this temporarily changes us...once all of thesr drugs cycle out, you will recognize your old self.
I have been off my work for over a year l was a manager in an internet bank l have just started back as a phased return. While l was off l had 2 hips replaced and 1 knee. So its been a tough year. I still need my other knee done but have put it on hold as the 3 surgeries have took there toll on me. I have only done 2 days a week the past 3 week but like you l feel like a stranger. My position has been taken so l am basically moved into another seat with 1 person next to me that works part time to. I decided l could not face or do full time again because of the pain l am in sitting at a desk for 7hrs so l have reduced my hours to 3 days a week. But l feel fed up going in. Its a total struggle and l feel like there is no place for me anymore. I have worked there for. 14 years yet it feels like l am a new person. I have basically been left to do my own thing as l have tests that l need to catch up on for the full year l have been on which need to be done in the banking industry. I used to really enjoy my job but l hate it now. So you are not alone. I have no clue what will happen going forward. Right. Now l am only needing to do 2 days as l have holidays to use up before end of year. And l have found that going part time has not made a huge diffrrnce to my wage as l don't pay tax because of how much l earn. I feel like will never go back to normal me. I am nearly 43 and have worked all my life. I hope this helps. The thing is l still have a knee to do and am not sure how long it will hold out for.
Hi Kate, hang on in there, it will probably get better gradually. I also teach, and it's hard work. When I first went back I too felt a bit out of it all, and was quite fed up at times, but it's all improving. I'm really pleased you've got a phased return. Take it steadily, and try not to overdo it. I wish you well.
I'm sure it feels really awful...maybe they are trying to make it easier for you. I think we are all hypersensitive...I feel as if the world and its mother are looking at me when I go out, cushion, crutches and all! Bestest best of luck you you xxx
There is so much I should be grateful for, sadly I'm in a bubble and can only focus on how I feel.
Reading your note , I truly understand the position you're in. Your company, like so many just don't understand the healing process. It's now more than ever that we need the support of our managers, but they don't have the knowledge or time, hence the pushing to one side while we're left to get on with it!
I've thought about retiring but I know I have so much more to give!
But I'm not as sharp as I was in May, find I can't respond quickly when problem solving which is quite scary.
I've worked at this school for 10 years and friends did visit me during the summer which was lovely. But I have lost a great deal of confidence, people see me back and expect me to react as the old Kate and I can't.
I've had 4 major operations in my life (62 last month) but this one has affected me more than the rest! I know it's 'cause I'm older and can't bounce back like I used to.
I can only offer my friendship, love and ongoing support. If only more people understood how these huge events affect our lives, maybe there should be less taboo subjects and we all talk more freely without fear of being judged.
your health, physical and emotional is more important than anything else, don't leave your knee too long it can only lengthen your recovery period the more you delay my love.
one thing I would throw out there, the pain meds and other meds related to the surgery screw with your emotions and sometimes make your mind do strange things. I found myself at times getting depressed and short tempered etc. Sometimes you gotta just step back and put the situation in perspective.
Focus on healing, once you get well and back to normal work will return as well. it is a process. get healed, get the meds out of your system life returns to normal.
It is so tough ... you have gone through so much the last year and still have a lot on your plate ... perhaps your values have changed and other things have become more important -
of course you lost touch with the corporate banking world and yes, you were replaced -
Personally, I find this whole hip journey very confrontational -
For now, maybe you can just ride the year out - do your best, make it interesting for your self -
Is there anything that you would like to do ? A new direction maybe?
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thanks for that Peter. x