My LDR boyfriend is questioning his feelings for me this past week due to his depression. Until now we have been in a healthy relationship. One problem is that he hates talking to me about these types of things. What can I do to make him feel better and save our relationship?
sadly, not very much. a depressed person really needs to want to get help themselves - pressure from outside can actually make things worse. All you can do is explain to him that you understands he struggles, and you will be as supportive as you can be - but if he doesnt get help, then it might put too much pressure on the relationship. That way your not blaming him, but your being honest. Never ever lie to a depressed person or try to force them to do anything - it simply will backfire, its a horrible illness, but the key to recovery has to lie with the person who has it, everyone else can choose to be supportive or they can choose to leave - either is fine and understandable, as long as your honest
I am actually questioning my relatinship with my boyfriend lately and I'm curious if it has to do with my depresion that is being treated.
We are very open about talking things through, so for the past month I've needed space. The more I've been around my boyfriend, the worse I feel. I feel extremely guilty for putting him through this type of pain and that guilt on top of my brain moving 95 mph trying to figure this out is too much stress for me to handle. He's been great with space and I'm starting to find myself again. That to me is what I need to figure out what I need from the relationship and that would be my advice - see if it seems like he needs some space.
For me, my boyfriend clinging on to me and bringing me flowers and that type of thing only made the situation worse. He wanted to show me he was there for me and loved me, which is always important, but it isn't what I needed.
Best of luck! I'm so sorry you have to go through this but it's great that you are trying to be as understanding as possible. Sometimes depression really screws with the brain in very hurtful ways.