i lost my mum five years ago and know ive let myself go. i dont sleep or eat properly and just feel like i never want to do things. my house is a complete mess but i just cant be bothered doing anything about it. im now making excuses about going out. my brother wants me to meet his fiance but i keep putting him off. ive even started cancelling doctors appointments. i just cant see a way out of this mess im on antidepressants but they arent working as ive been on them for twelve months i feel ive let everyone down and mum would be disgusted in me
Hi Alison - sorry for your loss. Have you tried grief counselling? It can help you move through the process.
hi alison, poor you, have you tried CRUSE? they are a bereavement service. you need help with this. i had to have help when my dad died. x
Hi Alison,
Your Mum wouldnt be disgusted in you being a Mum myself I would hate you been so sad and your Mum would too. I think you need someone to talk to, in your area can you self refer yourself. Losing a Mum is very hard you have one Mum and its never the same again. I self referred myself for counselling, the first counsellor didnt suit so if one doesnt seem right you can see another one until you feel comfy with that counsellor. What you are feeling is normal and the apathy is depression. Its hard meeting people I get that as it is very tiring putting on an act for people. My Mam died three years ago and I have bad days, I do exercise to try to help but miss her very much. Is there anyone you can talk to?
My opinion is that you’re experiencing a very natural depression due to the passing of your Mum. It would be helpful for you to accept this about yourself as well as accept all the results of your depressed state such as a messy house, etc.
It also sounds like you may need a different antidepressant and if possible some therapy to talk things out for as long as you need to.
Please don’t dwell on what your mother’s reaction would be to your condition and the condition of your life. The important thing is for you to accept yourself as you are, and be kind to yourself and give yourself some slack until you can get this thing sorted out.